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AIBU?

see. i knew this would happen. and now i am pissed off.

146 replies

TeggieCampbeggBlegg · 22/03/2013 07:59

dh. New job. Different hours. Further to drive. His car drinks more fuel than mine.

I predicted that he'd want to take my car not his. Financial logic agrees.

But I am actually pissed off.

It is my car. Mine. I bought it. I paid for ut. Mine.

And now it is my day off. All I need to do is tske DD and pick her up from her friday thing. I hate driving his car.

Be gentle. I have an evil cold and have yanked my back coughing. And i hurt.

OP posts:

Report

LadyFlumpalot · 22/03/2013 09:22

I'm the opposite OP. I loathe my stupid little "sensible" car with a passion and would happily leave it with the engine running and alone at night in the hope it would get nicked. Only, I can't drive it anyway as its broken and SORNed.

I absolutely adore DH's huge petrol guzzling 2.5l v6 Mitsubishi and steal it at every available opportunity. The exhaust note alone gives me a case of the wibbles.

It's not good in the snow (or rain, or mildly damp weather) at all though.

P.S, I'm with you on the living in the back end of nowhere. There is one bus a week here and no pavements on the busy 60mph main road that links us to the nearest town, 6 miles away.

stargirl1701 · 22/03/2013 09:26

Oh, I hear you. I love my car but HATE DH's. It's a hulking big Nissan Navarra and mine is a dinky Fiesta ST. His is like driving a bloody tractor. Hate it, hate it, hate it!

pictish · 22/03/2013 09:28

Yanbu!!

The fact is, he should sell his car and buy a more suitable one.
You deliberately chose the car you did, to serve your needs. His circumstances have changed and now he needs a car more like yours...that does not, to me, automatically equate that he just gets yours, and you end up with something you don't want and didn't choose.

Seems unfair to me!

differentnameforthis · 22/03/2013 09:29

We have 2 cars. One is a company car (dh's) and one is my (officially the family) car. When I pop out & dh is in, I use his car (company petrol). When I do my weekend job I take his car (I am insured on it & his boss knows I use it a lot & doesn't mind). Saves on fuel & messing around with car seats.

I can't get too emotional about a car, tbh.

CooEeeEldridge · 22/03/2013 09:33

You're refusing to go out because you 'don't like' to drive his car? YABU.

GoSuckEggs · 22/03/2013 09:49

ssd - you are coming across as very bitter. SO WHAT she has 2 cars?! I hate it when people come on to a thread not about money and then try and make it about money! FFS boo fecking hoo

PureQuintessence · 22/03/2013 09:57

I wish we had two cars. It would make my life easier occasionally.

But we dont, we have a family car, and dh has a motorbike for work. Excellent fuel economy. Much cheaper to run. And faster for him!
Dh goes to lots of business meetings. He arrives wearing leathers, and changes into a suit. Birmingham on Monday, Germany on Wednesday, parking in airports are free if you have a motorbike. Parking is generally free with a motorbike.

Could your dh consider exchanging the big tractor for a motorbike?

And now that he has wired his motorbiking jacket with heated wires and connected to the battery of the bike, he is even warm when driving, and I have one more thing to worry about!

LadyBeagleEyes · 22/03/2013 09:58

I think Taggie is being lighthearted here you know.
I don't drive, but I'm very possessive and petty about MY stuff.
I hate it if someone drinks from MY mug, or reads MY Sunday paper before me, or God Forbid they sit in MY spot
I'm now divorced so these things don't really affect me too much any more, ds abides by my rules as I've brought him up right.

PureQuintessence · 22/03/2013 09:58

I think op is cranky because she is ill and she has hurt her back, and hates driving his clunky big old car without power-steering. Not great if your back is hurting.

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 22/03/2013 10:01

YANBU

I love my car.

However - seems like it makes sense for him to use yours for the moment. Is it possible to change his to something more economical and then you can have yours back?

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 22/03/2013 10:03

BTW - well done your DH on getting a new job pretty quickly, I remember your post when he was made redundant.

everlong · 22/03/2013 10:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Airwalk79 · 22/03/2013 10:07

We have to share a car. If I want/need the car on a day that dh Is at work we all have to get up at 530, pack the kids in and drop him off, then we have to keep the kids up and pick him up at 8 pm.
It's crap if you've got nothing better to worry about, but really!
I would love to have two cars, in fact anything that got us around would be ace.
When your a family do you not work as a team to achieve the best you can for all of you, and think of the money your saving that can go towards something for your family?

akaemmafrost · 22/03/2013 10:08

Yes it's a first world problem etc but I'd be pissed off too OP.

Iaintdunnuffink · 22/03/2013 10:09

It does make sense for him to drive the smaller car. I was a sahm for 8 years and always had the big car, I was the one who needed the space and day to day didn't do so many miles. I'm working now and still have an estate as my miles are shorter and due to my hours I'm still more likely to do the pick ups. My husband has the small, cheap run around that usually only gets used for commuting. It probably won't take you long to get used to a larger car.

Even though we say my car and his car, actually they're both family cars. Still I don't like driving HIS car. It's fun to drive seeing as its so small and like a go-cart but it does t have all my stuff in it, it's filthy and not clean like mine. The clutch biting point is completely different, then I have to remember where the lights, indicators and windscreen wipers are. It's so much more relaxing to drive a car that you know.

LtEveDallas · 22/03/2013 10:14

Off topic but

Quint And now that he has wired his motorbiking jacket with heated wires and connected to the battery of the bike, he is even warm when driving, and I have one more thing to worry about

What? Really? I didn't even know this was possible . Won't he get electrocuted in the rain?

TastesLikePanda · 22/03/2013 10:18

Sometimes, when you are always 'mum' or 'wife' or whatever, it's nice to have something that is just yours for you.

It might be a lovely big thing like a car, it might be a little thing like a favourite mug... But it's the feeling that you are not an add on, but still a teeny bit of your own person. Everyone knows its polite and correct to share. Everyone sometimes wants to throw a toddler tantrum and snatch back the shared item, because its yours, for you.

I might not be making much sense because I have sinussy yuck ness that I self medicated with lots of wine last night.

TheCatIsUpTheDuff · 22/03/2013 10:18

You have my sympathy. Fortunately, DH's Big Man Car is more economical than my little car, so I only have to drive it when more Big Men need fetching from the pub than will fit comfortably in mine. It's a nice car, but all the controls are in the wrong place and it's tuned to the wrong radio station.

HelgatheHairy · 22/03/2013 10:22

teggie similar situation to DH and I. But on your days off couldn't he take his car just for that one day? That's what DH and I do. He generally has my car but there are certain days when I want it so he takes his on those days.

TeggieCampbeggBlegg · 22/03/2013 10:25

Ooooh. The lovely sympathy is lovely.

I know it's a ridiculous and pathetic 'problem'. Really. I'm over it now. It was too early for me to be rational.

I'm considering wiring my house-cardigan in to the mains to warm me up a bit.

OP posts:

Owllady · 22/03/2013 10:26

what you need is a shetland pony and a trap
that's what happened in my day you ungrateful woman

or a unicorn, either would suffice

TeggieCampbeggBlegg · 22/03/2013 10:29

Hmmm. I wonder if I'd have to pay to park a pony at work......

OP posts:

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SouthernComforts · 22/03/2013 10:32

I don't have a car.

TeggieCampbeggBlegg · 22/03/2013 10:37

Can I be unreasonable about how cold I am?

It isn't even snowing here.

OP posts:

eminemmerdale · 22/03/2013 10:39

I've turned into spoilt wifey today as well. we have 2 cars - both tiny - one micra, 12 years old (MINE!) and a fiesta, 10 years old (given to us) Dh drives fiesta I drive mine. Although, we tend to share dependant on which has the most petrol in it! Dh's is broke :( and we can't afford to get it fixed till next week so he's using mine, which is making me unreasonably outraged as I can't just jump into mine on my day off and tootle about. It's a ridiculous 'problem' but I just almost cried at the thought of 'only' having one car

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