AiBU to think you should buy a kid the present you promised you would?

[Kiriwawa]

DS is 6. My sister asked what he wanted for his birthday so I sent her a couple of suggestions. She replied saying she'd get him X so I replied dating he'd be thrilled as it was something he really wanted.

Last weekend was his party and a couple of the children have him cash which of course was burning a hole in his pocket so I took him to the toy shop. They had an X which he really wanted to spend the money on but I wouldn't let him, saying I was pretty sure he was going to get it today when we were meeting with my family.

Today we met up, had a lovely family lunch and then presents and my sister has got him something else. He was very polite and pleased with his presents but when we were on my own a bit later he asked me why he hadn't got the X thing.

I wouldn't have mentioned it at all but he's been going on and on about this particular thing for months (since before Xmas) and I've just kept saying 'wait till your birthday'.

I just think it's really odd behaviour on her part. AIBU? I do feel like an ungrateful wretch so happy to accept I am.

Definitely learned a valuable lesson! Stinky it was a skylander

Did she get him y, ie the other option you mentioned?
If it was my sister, I would probably ask.

My mil does this all the time to me and 2 of our dc. She moves the earth to get the right thing for our other dc. Very annoying for all the reasons mentioned.

My in laws do this. Children are older now but when they were young MIL would ask what they wanted , would suggest X,Y and Z (never expensive always easily available in shops) she would say ok and then I would ask my family to get other things. Come Christmas/birthday MIL would produce presents - which were always lovely but never anything like X,Y or Z. One year my eldest was a bit disappointed (she had wanted one of those bloody Girls World Head thing), but thankfully had some spending money so used that.

After that we just let MIL choose all her own presents and if children really wanted something then either we or my family would opt to get it!.

This happened to DS as well. Relative said they'd get him something which was important to him and he'd been asking for for weeks. I even sent her a link to somewhere she could buy it from. I didn't buy it so he didn't end up with two, then she bought him something else, which he was happy with, but he was disappointed he hadn't got the big important present (which wasn't that big, but it was important to him) that he really wanted.

I've decided now to just make sure I get him the specific thing he wants myself and let my random ideas go to other people just in case they decide to get something else.

YANBU

If you are an adult, and you say you will do something, you should do it, barring exceptional circumstances.

Although to be fair he's now decided he wants an iPad for his birthday which he has absolutely no chance of getting (he's 4!) so maybe he will just have to learn to be disappointed

My friends mil was asked to buy a specific coat. She had been asking what she could get. Child and my friend were pleased as they had liked the coat and mil said all good age would get it.

On child's birthday she had brought a different coat as she said that the coat picked was vile and she couldn't possibly have brought it.

Mental.

My MiL does this too.

Drives me nuts asking what the kids want in the run up to birthdays or Christmas. I give her suggestions, then she gives me reasons why she can't buy any of the things they want (usually because she doesn't like or approve of it), then asks for more suggestions, then refuses to buy any of the 2nd list.

Now, we (or my Mum) buys them the stuff that they really want, and give MiL a list and not rely on her buying anything from it (this year she bought swings for the garden, then got shirty when we pointed out we already had a nice wooden climbing frame/swings/slide set)

I don't care what they buy, I don't care if they don't buy the kids anything, just stop nagging me to death for suggestions then ignoring them and getting upset when she buys something we already have!!!!!

I'm sorry but I hate this sort of thing - if you have no intention of getting the bloody present then don't ask for ideas and then PROMISE that's what you'll get! It's very simple. The grandparents did this to my children at Christmas and I was livid because we hadn't bought said presents because grandparents had promised. It's perfectly reasonable to think up your own ideas and get what you want to buy but please don't make promises you have no intention of keeping. If said present cannot be bought then they should say asap (pref before birthday/christmas). A birthday is a child's special day and said gift had been promised - does it matter if said gift was something that sister may have thought child wouldn't play with?? Then as the adult sister shouldn't haven't said she would buy it and then someone else could have or child could have with his money. The idea of ringing the sister to check she had bought it whilst they were in the shop is a good idea but I'm not sure I would have done it as it might have seemed abit rude - sister might then have snapped "I said I was getting it and I have!" but for the child it is a big deal and for the parents who then have an upset child it is a big deal - why create problems that can be easily avoided? And for anyone who thinks a child doesn't derserve what they ask for on their birthday - do you deliberately go out and buy things for your own kids that those kids don't want and didn't ask for just so you can see the crushing disappointment on their faces?????

I think that if you have said you will buy it, then you should, providing you know the cost and can afford it. DS has had a couple of presents promised from his Godparents and then they turn up with something different.

YANBU.
But this is why I always make sure that I get DS1 the things he specifically wants.
I can actually control a lot of what he gets because of family being in another country - so they give me money and I buy presents for him, much more efficient than them sending stuff overseas (and far less expensive!). This way I can ensure that DS1 doesn't miss out on stuff he's been on and on about for ever (to him).

I also don't understand why people would do this - if you give a suggestion and then they look it up and decide it's too expensive/something they don't like/have an issue with, then FGS they should tell you about it so you can buy it yourself and let them buy something else!

Sorry that your DS was let down by your sister - because he was.