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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Wanting an hour's peace from my kids?

19 replies

jorja75 · 16/03/2013 16:00

My teenage sons have a metabolic disorder, we have no help from any quarter, so quality time for me and my husband are at a premium. Like a lot of teenage boys our two are constantly fighting, it's tiring, and i'm starting to resent them. I feel selfish for wanting a break from them and guilty that we don't seem to enjoy family days out the way we used to. Is this normal?

OP posts:
Smartiepants79 · 16/03/2013 16:10

Have no experience myself but would say it is totally normal.
My 2 are healthy, if littler than yours, and I still crave a bit of peace and quiet.
You don't sound selfish just worn out and worn down.
Try and give yourself a break.
Get some alone time if you can it will make you a better parent.

mrsjay · 16/03/2013 16:14

yes it is normal for teenagers to fight bicker and hate family days out of course you need a break from them what age are they can your son with the disorder be left on his own with his brother ?

blackeyedsusan · 16/03/2013 16:14

I waas going to say that is what bedtime is for... but I see they are past that! no, you are not unreasonble. everyone needs time out.

mrsjay · 16/03/2013 16:16

I have teenage girls I escape to my bedroom with a book or to watch tv most nights at about 9pm just for an hours peace from everything it is my sanctuary and unless they house is falling down it is do not disturb

Original poster
jorja75 · 16/03/2013 16:23

They would probably kill each other if left alone lol I guess they're just at that difficult age when nothing seems to please them. I went back to work p/t just to get a break and started writing at night as a distraction.

OP posts:
mrsjay · 16/03/2013 16:25

id send them or 1 to their room and say they are not allowed to talk to each other been there done that sigh

Original poster
jorja75 · 16/03/2013 16:30

The eldest does that annoying muttering when he's sent to his room. You know the whole 'It's not fair, I didn't do anything' routine while he's banging about. Hmm, maybe I should just invest in a set of earplugs :D

OP posts:
TheElephantIsADaintyBird · 16/03/2013 16:32

Yanbu, everyone needs a bit of 'me' time. The years fly by so quickly, it won't be long till they're grown and will be moving out. Cherish any bits of time you get to yourself for now - housework or whatever else can wait if it has to. It won't be like this forever. Wine also helps!

acceptableinthe80s · 16/03/2013 16:37

YABU, an hour is not enough! I have one 4yr old and he does not shut up, EVER. He has actually said 'mummaay' about 40 times in the last minute alone.
Do your sons not have any outside interests/clubs they go to? Or friends they could visit? I've just started doing playdates on alternate weeks with a friend of ds's (i realise your boys are a bit old for that) and i now get one whole afternoon a fortnight to myself, usually spent catching up on housework but sometimes i let it slide and just chill on the sofa with a movie, tis bliss!

mrsjay · 16/03/2013 16:40

\I just noticed they both have the disorder do you need to do any personal care for them sorry for being nosey but if they have an illness ontop of being stroppy teens it really must be exhausting for you, tbh id let them mutter and let them get on with it, are they close in age ?

Pollydon · 16/03/2013 16:44

Yanbu

Original poster
jorja75 · 16/03/2013 16:46

Lol My youngest hasn't grown out of the constant question stage either but it's now interspersed with the 'i'm bored' comments. They do have clubs but of course we spend more time playing chauffeur to them. there was a new club starting tonight with a free bus service which they both showed an interest in. Until today. Youngest said he didn't want to go because the oldest was taking his friends, then the oldest decided he wasn't going because his friends changed their mind, so the youngest decided he did want to go - at which point we all got fed up and decided no-one's going out. We've now swapped our quiet dinner for two we were hoping for, for pizza

OP posts:
Original poster
jorja75 · 16/03/2013 16:50

There's three years between them and they both have Phenylketonuria. It means they are on a low protein diet - no meat, dairy, wheat, pulses etc etc
So yeah, it's fun...not!

OP posts:
mrsjay · 16/03/2013 16:53

Is that PKU ? you just sound exhausted by them let them mutter and suik could you let 1 go out tonight and then the other could stay home splittignt hem up might be helpful and a bit more peaceful

Original poster
jorja75 · 16/03/2013 16:55

Yes, that's PKU. Well, they both seem to be sulking at the minute so at least it's quiet lol

OP posts:
mrsjay · 16/03/2013 16:57

cherish the silence Grin Im just smug because mine are not at home Grin dd is nearly 20 but she can still wind her sister up drives me bonkers

drownangels · 16/03/2013 16:57

Yeah perfectly normal - well it is in my house. Ds1 is 16 and the other is 13. The bickering and ds1 pulling rank on ds2 is wearing.

Original poster
jorja75 · 16/03/2013 17:02

Lucky thing! I've already said I'm not one of those mothers who'll find themselves at a loss when they move out.

Snap! Well Ds 1 is 15 but still pulling rank on the youngest.

OP posts:
curiousgeorgie · 16/03/2013 17:34

I only have one and she's pretty good as they go, but I love Saturday mornins off :)

Very normal!

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