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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to enjoy winding up people who think their bag needs a seat

212 replies

motheroftwoboys · 13/03/2013 13:20

I usually wimp out of asking people to move so I can sit down but yesterday and today have, with a smile, asked to sit down. You would think I was asking the earth. Young woman yesterday, sitting on the aisle seat on a busy bus with very small handbag on seat. She sighed dramatically and made a big play of making me sit at the window instead of moving across herself. I got off before her and she actually tutted when I politedly said excuse me. I said thank you in over loud and friendly way and I was still chuckling when I got off the bus. This morning there was a bloke who thought his paper needed a seat when he was reading it. Same tactic. Same response. Wonder what my journey home will bring. [wing]

OP posts:
LoversThatWentWrong · 13/03/2013 14:13

I always put my bag on the seat next to me, but if it gets busy then I'll always move it.

It's annoying when people purposely decide to sit on the aisle seat on a busy bus/train.

And although this isn't related to the thread (sorry OP) but I am so bloody sick of British bashing on here. I'm not patriotic and neither do I have the English flag tattooed on me but my god people are so bloody disrespectful on here - I see it all the time. At least 2 examples just on this thread.

If you hate this country so much then move somewhere else.

StuntGirl · 13/03/2013 14:14

Once on the way to Manchester on a very busy train for a night out we had to stand as there were no seats.Two women next to us got up as it was their stop so my brother and I sat down. They came back a minute later as they'd got the wrong stop and theirs was next instead. Told us to move as we were sitting in their seats. We said no as they'd left those seats and they were getting off at the next one anyway. They punched my brother in the head. Every single person on the packed carriage fucking applauded.

I hate trains and I hate people more.

nancerama · 13/03/2013 14:20

On a packed train back from London a couple of years ago an aisle seat dweller had all her belongings heaped up next to her on the window seat. I asked her if I could sit down. She replied "but what am I supposed to do with my shopping?" I suggested she could perhaps put it in the overhead rack. She tutted, rolled her eyes and then slowly started to shuffle her things around whilst grumbling and muttering. I decided I couldn't bear a whole journey being made to feel guilty for denying a precious Hobbs bag a seat and relegating the poor thing to a rack, so I loudly announced "I'm clearly inconveniencing you, don't bother yourself" and swivelled round on my heels to console myself with some wine tea in the buffet car. As I swung round, I smacked her straight in the face with my handbag. I swear it was an accident, but it couldn't have happened to a nicer person.

FruitOwl · 13/03/2013 14:20

I never put my bag on bus seats usually, but a few weeks ago had been grocery shopping and had about 5 bags, so put a couple on the seat next to me. I was a bit taken aback when a lady merrily plonked herself down on top of my shopping without even asking me to move the stuff. Fair enough, you may think, but I was one of about 5 people on the whole bus! She broke my eggs and I was very confused by the whole thing! Grin

ReturnofSaturn · 13/03/2013 14:22

To be honest I usually just pick up the bag and hand it to them and sit down.

TeamEdward · 13/03/2013 14:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

creighton · 13/03/2013 14:28

i like to spread out if there is room but will move my bag if the seat is needed. if people get shirty, ask them if they bought a ticket for their bag, if not, it doesn't require a seat of its own.

KellyElly · 13/03/2013 14:29

Bit off the point here but what drives me INSANE on the tube is those people who seem to think that their elbows have more right to the arm rest than yours and not only take up the whole arm rest but hang over your seat/dig into you as well. If I had a pound for the times I've sat squished between two arm rest hoggers I'd be a bloody millionaire Grin

Lottapianos · 13/03/2013 14:30

StuntGirl, that's horrendous. Shock WTF is wrong with people????

'She replied "but what am I supposed to do with my shopping?" '

Again, I ask - WTF is wrong with people??????? Confused Shock

Eveho · 13/03/2013 14:32

I hope you'll have seen by now OP that the general view is that you are not being unreasonable at all

Loversthatwentwrong however, where the FRIG has this little gem come from??

And although this isn't related to the thread (sorry OP) but I am so bloody sick of British bashing on here. I'm not patriotic and neither do I have the English flag tattooed on me but my god people are so bloody disrespectful on here - I see it all the time. At least 2 examples just on this thread. If you hate this country so much then move somewhere else

Fillyjonk75 · 13/03/2013 14:34

On trains out of London that have the three seats across though, the first people take the aisle and window seats. If you came along as the third person and asked the aisle seat occupier to move up to the middle, you would just get laughed at. The latecomer has to sit in the middle and be slightly squashed, those are the rules!

Though I've found three normally sized women can sit in the three seats quite comfortably. It's the men with their outsized shoulders who spoil it. :)

Maebe · 13/03/2013 14:36

Hate it, hate it, hate it. My train home is a busy commuter train, it's full every night with every seat taken, and I doubt there are many people on there who don't get that train every day. Yet people still sit in the aisle seat, and pull faces, roll their eyes, and generally act like they are being asked for permission to be punched in the face if you ask them to let you sit in their window seat.

Bastards.

LadyPessaryPam · 13/03/2013 14:42

Fillyjonk75 Though I've found three normally sized women can sit in the three seats quite comfortably. It's the men with their outsized shoulders who spoil it.

The ones that piss me off are the men who obviously have swollen genitalia as they have to sit with their legs akimbo. They make me think of baboons for some reason.

Fillyjonk75 · 13/03/2013 14:45

Yes LPP. I've had them do that and deliberately rub their knee against mine as well. Urgh.

woozlebear · 13/03/2013 14:48

I don't even ask. I just stand and glare at the bags. Always works. Never found a way of dealing successfull with the won't-move-over-brigade though. I've often stopped halfway through the ridiculous pantomine whereby I and my shopping have to scramble over them and their shopping while trying not to concuss myself on bits of bus roof or land in their laps and said 'would it not have been easier if you'd just moved over?'. Recently I've started just saying 'oh forget it, if you won't just move over' and standing instead. They invariable don't get off until after you anyway.

I've never had a response beyond gawping at my like a goldfish. What is WITH these people? Why is it so much better sitting on the aisle? You just get biffed by everyone walking past. It's like an obsession for a lot of people though!

Crinkle77 · 13/03/2013 14:51

Something similar happened to my mum at the bus stop. A woman had her bags on the seat and my mum asked if she could sit down and the cheeky cow said she did not want to put her bags on the floor. My mum insisted that she move them as she was not prepared to stand so this woman could keep her bags on the seat

PopeBenedictsP45 · 13/03/2013 14:52

I've lived all over the world and it's definitely the Brits who have the edge on PA bus behaviour! Sometimes it got me down but sometimes I'd look at it as a competitive sport and rub my hands together before getting on the bus and looking for the most likely competitor.

And Loversthatwentwrong I have left the UK now, is it ok if I bitch about the British? Grin

Poledra · 13/03/2013 14:53

Ach, people are just so RUDE and they miss out on lovely random chats. I was upstairs on a bus just before Christmas, sitting in the seat just opposite the top of the stairs. I saw a rather frail elderly gentleman coming up the stairs rather shakily, so moved my bags so he could sit down next to me (bus wasn't full upstairs, just didn't want him to have to try and walk down a moving bus). He thanked me, then we had a lovely chat about what I'd been buying for my DCs in town, about his DGC, who (whom?) he and his wife were taking to the pantomime soon, all sorts of lovely things. Passed the time beautifully.

Lemonylemon · 13/03/2013 14:54

"The ones that piss me off are the men who obviously have swollen genitalia as they have to sit with their legs akimbo. They make me think of baboons for some reason."

In a world where I was very brave, I think I would say to them that I was sure their dicks weren't that big, so please stand up, rearrange your balls and sit down properly again. Or "how big do you think your dick is?"

But I'm not that brave. Sigh.

MechanicalTheatre · 13/03/2013 14:54

I find it really really odd that people get so uptight about this. I put my bag on seats (unless it's busy, then I take it off so people don't have to ask) because it's comfier than having it on my knee (and I'm wary of it having contact with the floor of a London bus in case it gets peed on by a marauding rat.)

Just ask the person to move their bag. It's no big deal AT ALL. I do find it a bit weird that some people don't move their bag when they see it's busy, but like...just ask.

CloudsAndTrees · 13/03/2013 14:56

I can understand being pissed off at people who don't want to move their bag off a seat when the train is crowded, but what's the problem if there's space elsewhere? Confused

And why should someone move over if they are in the aisle seat? Even more Confused If you want the seat next to the window, then have the seat next o the window. But don't expect someone else to actually vacate their seat for you. That's just rude.

MinesaBottle · 13/03/2013 15:03

People who sit in aisle seats drive me nuts. A few weeks ago I just made it onto a busy train at evening rush hour and amazingly spotted a window seat near the door. There was a man, probably late 20s/early 30s sitting in the aisle seat but I asked him to let me past (I am not shy about asking for a spare seat at all, for myself or for other people) ? he tutted and moaned and took his bag out of the empty seat and then whinged at me about why couldn?t I have sat in the spare aisle seat further down the carriage (I would?ve done but hadn?t seen it, being in a rush). But FFS! Who is he exactly to tell people where they can sit so it doesn?t impinge on his sodding all-important comfort?! Angry That?s what I should have said but of course I didn?t, I just said, ?And this seat was free too?. And he got out before me anyway. Which was a shame as I was looking forward to annoying him again as I got off the train.

On the other hand, yesterday I was getting on the bus and there was a window seat with a lady sitting in the aisle seat, she looked really apologetic and said she was getting off at the next stop or she?d have moved over for me instead of me having to squeeze past her. At least she was polite and sensible about it!

She's an exception though. Honestly, if people don't want to travel in contact with other people at busy times, get a cab or drive or something! It's called public transport for a reason

Lottapianos · 13/03/2013 15:06

'And why should someone move over if they are in the aisle seat? '

Like woozlebear said, it's like an obsession for some people - must always sit in aisle seat! Is it so they don't have to go to the great and extravagant trouble of saying 'excuse me' to someone when they want to get off? They should move over because it's a lot less faff for all involved.

Kendodd · 13/03/2013 15:11

I've sat my two (when they were two and three) on one seat together once, I was standing. An adult came and asked for their seat because 'children are better able to stand' I made them get up but looking back I should have said 'no, they can stay seated'.

havingamadmoment · 13/03/2013 15:12

I have honestly never had a problem with this despite not driving so using a lot of public transport. Sometimes people have their bags on seats but they either move them when they see there are no other seats left or I say " could i sit down please" and they move them. Mind I have also never had a problem with pushchairs, wheelchairs or any other sort of chairs!

I must live in a really really helpful part of the country Grin.