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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect to be able to leave dry skin cream at school for my daughters hands?

127 replies

BollyGood · 12/03/2013 10:18

I don't usually post in here but am so surprised by school this morning. My daughters hands sometimes get very sore and dry in the winter,I use Oilatum cream for her to soothe it. The soap at school really irritates her poor hands too. Usually she has a little tin of Vaseline lip balm to put on it in her book bag but this week as its been so cold the Vaseline didn't help.

Instead of hiding the oilatum in her bag,I took it to the office with her name and class on asked if her hands were cracking and painful could she come and put her cream on, she can do it herself. Same as with the sun cream policy. But no apparently not. It has to be prescribed cream with the child's prescription sticker on it. We have had it prescribed and do for the baby but I buy it when haven't had time or been able to get a docs appointment and it lasts forever. Dd's soreness is seasonal so sometimes she only needs to out the cream on for a few days and we do not need to bother the doctor. Haven't had a bottle with her name on for ages.

I have now had to ring for an appointment which I couldn't get but the receptionist kindly offered to see if she could get another presciption for dd with her name on even though we have just had a big bottle for the baby and do not need it. I know schools have policies but honestly what's the difference between a day or two of hand cream to stop a little one feeling distressed and sore and sun cream which is not prescribed? I didn't need to call the docs or make an extra trip for cream I don't need and dd could not have anything on her hands today as they wouldn't let me leave the cream nor would the school let her stay in at playtime( she does wear thick gloves but still seems to happen)so when her hands are sore no-one can help her.

I have even got the lovely teaching assistant in trouble who helped her put Vaseline on yesterday as I said dd was so upset it was hurting and she couldn't manage, the secretary said ' oh we have Vaseline in school do we?' So now the helper will be asked why she helped my child who shouldn't have had Vaseline. I feel terrible! I will not have this problem again as will pick up the new bottle tomorrow, but seriously WIBU? Has the world of school gone mad??? You don't always need a prescription for something do you? And if I signed a form which said I am happy for my daughter to use her cream surely that's ok? If she had a reaction it would be my responsibility and she still could react even if it was prescribed. I know it isn't the secretary's fault and I did ask to see the head or deputy head but they are both out today and tomorrow. Massive post over cream sorry! When dd1 was at primary school 16 years ago life was so much easier for these things. Go on tell me I am naive and should have known better...

OP posts:
BeerTricksPotter · 12/03/2013 10:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

catchafallingstar · 12/03/2013 10:24

I think yabu.

It is not a TEACHING assistant's job to help your daughter put cream on. If her hands are as bad as you say then she should have been taken to the doctor and not self medicating with creams which are obviously not working.
Teachers and office staff are not there to monitor skin complaints of children in their care.

JaxTellerIsMyFriend · 12/03/2013 10:25

Bureaucracy gone mad!

GooseyLoosey · 12/03/2013 10:26

Dd has always had vaseline in school. I think the doctor would laugh if I went in for a prescription for it. Understand the school's policy with regard to medicines etc but you would have thought they could exercise some common sense with regard to an emolient that is as common as chips.

dd also has an enormous variety of creams for psoriasis - we use different ones depending on what stage a flare up is at. Some are prescription, some are not. No one has ever said that this is a problem. Sometimes I do think the world has gone mad. There is a difference between being safe and being stupid and I think we have lost sight of where that is!

Original poster
BollyGood · 12/03/2013 10:27

Gah catch! My dd can put on her own cream usually! The teaching assistant was being KIND as it was particularly bad and she is in their care all day, have you no heart!

OP posts:
catchafallingstar · 12/03/2013 10:28

Also you asked to see the head or depute head because the secretary did not allow non prescribed creams in the school? I bet they love you!

Original poster
BollyGood · 12/03/2013 10:28

Sorry I know I asked for it but if you read my post properly you will see the cream does work very very well infact! She does have it prescribed.

OP posts:
EllenParsons · 12/03/2013 10:28

Yanbu at all. That sounds really frustrating and crazy.

The poster above me seems to have missed the point a bit Confused since it sounds like your daughter could have just used the cream on her own without help if you had just been allowed to leave her it at school.

How old is your dd?

Shesparkles · 12/03/2013 10:29

YANBU at all. Sometimes the woods aren't seen for the trees when rules are blindly followed.
I I had a similar issue with my ds's asthma inhaler. If I followed the rules, it should have been kept in the school medical room. That's not very helpful of he needs it in the classroom (which he has) 2 floors away at the other end of a page primary school.
He keeps it in the pocket of his bag

Original poster
BollyGood · 12/03/2013 10:29

Dd is only 6. Why can't an adult help her if needed?

OP posts:
Original poster
BollyGood · 12/03/2013 10:30

Yes exactly shesparkles and you child's health matter is far more serious. It did seem mad to me.

OP posts:
annh · 12/03/2013 10:30

What age is your daughter? Can she not keep the cream in her bag and put it on herself? If she uses the cream a lot, you will probably find that she very quickly gets used to doing it and using the correct amount?

Original poster
BollyGood · 12/03/2013 10:31

Oh catch I also wrote about sun cream which is a non prescribed cream and is allowed in school.

OP posts:
nokidshere · 12/03/2013 10:31

Dont be ridiculous catchafallingstar

Anyone who works with children and cares for them on a daily basis has a duty of care to make sure that the childs needs are met. And if that means helping a child put cream on, wiping their bottom, helping them get dressed or any other personal help, then thats what they should be doing.

Its beyond silly that a cream that can be bought over the counter to make someones life a little easier has to be on prescription for that child.

catchafallingstar · 12/03/2013 10:32

You asked Aibu? Sorry but I think you were.In the space of a busy school day, applying hand cream would come pretty low down in my list of priorities. She should be at the doctors if its sore and painful and then the prescribed cream dilemma would be solved. I am sorry that the doctors trip will inconvenience you....but that's my opinion, which you asked for, in posting here. Others may disagree. I hope your daughters hands heal soon.

SpicyPear · 12/03/2013 10:32

YANBU - I agree that the school are being ridiculous and obstructive about it. Common sense needs to apply in these situations.

shrinkingnora · 12/03/2013 10:33

My DD is allergic to the school soap and takes a bottle of hand sanitiser gel with her. The school knows about this and is sensible about it - might be worth a shot so her hands don't get so bad in the first place? Horrible for your DD.

shrinkingnora · 12/03/2013 10:34

catchafallingstar - she's not asking anyone to apply it, just to be able to leave it in the office (I assume where children go to take their inhalers etc) so her DD can go and apply it.

Feminine · 12/03/2013 10:35

YANBU in any way at all.

What a total pile of crap for you to deal with.

Can she wear gloves outside, plus avoid using very cold water...it makes it worse. I suffered dreadfully with bleeding hands from the cold when I lived abroad, coconut oil (organic health food shop) really ,really helped. Healed them actually. :)

Original poster
BollyGood · 12/03/2013 10:35

Annh dd is not allowed to have it in her bag unfortunately and she can already out it on usually. I think the Vaseline tubs are fiddle but it usually helps and is small enough to keep in her book bag for easy access. She can usually open it but her hands were particularly sore that day. Her oilatum is a pump bottle so really easy to use and I just though it would be okay for today.

Catch when a child has a skin complaint the cream is often applied throughout the day, I never asked school to 'monitor' her.

OP posts:
BeerTricksPotter · 12/03/2013 10:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
BollyGood · 12/03/2013 10:36

Catch SHE CAN APPLY IT HERSELF it was just yesterday.

OP posts:
BartletForTeamGB · 12/03/2013 10:37

www.ofsted.gov.uk/resources/factsheet-childcare-giving-medication-children-registered-childcare

Schools just need parental permission to give medications, not a doctor's prescription or letter, especially for non-prescription medications.

Original poster
BollyGood · 12/03/2013 10:38

Thanks shrinking that's a good idea. I know this is AIBU catch but read my question.

OP posts:
TheFallenNinja · 12/03/2013 10:38

This is a fairly blanket statement so bear with me.

Some receptionist at some establishments (schools,doctors surgeries, council departments) are to utterly ignored and treated with the contempt and blind ignorance and stupidity they display.

I reserve the following phrase for them.

"You don't seem to be listening, I want to speak to a manager or somebody with authority to discuss this"

This is used just before my blood boils. I'm not bothered about causing offence but there is a strata of administration in organisations whose sole mission is to say no to any reasonable request.

They should be hunted to extinction.