Feeling about ready for the one way trip to the glue factory...

[SolidGoldBrass]

Yes of course I'm really glad that my dodgy tit lump turned out benign, but another visit to the GP today has left me feeling just a bit disgruntled.

Firstly, had a smear test and got talked to about 'vaginal dryness in the older woman.' Subsequently got told that the funny lump on my finger is a Herbeton's node and that I have osteoarthritis, and should 'keep active'. I swear the GP, who looked about 15, was mentally measuring me up for a bath chair (and the zip up boots and the plastic rain hat)...

I am 48, not a pensioner. And in my head I am forever 27 anyway.

Yes. I am about 27 in my head.
The shock when I look in the mirror nearly kills me.
You should have told him to stop being silly,crack on with his homework and stop bothering the grown ups.

Ask if you can get a blue rinse on prescription?

Oh no SGB, that's awful! I'm not that far behind you and recently have been starting to feel pretty damn old tbh. I too get a shock when I look in the mirror. I try not to look nowadays, but there's always the shock glance in a shop window where I find myself wondering who that tired and overweight woman is. Very depressing.

bless you!

and thanks for making me feel like a relative spring chicken at 37

It's my bloody body that winds me up. I do more exercise now than I did in my 20s but still have those ridiculous flappy arms and saggy tummy. I now look at clothes in the shop and wonder if it is appropriate for a woman of my age ( but I feel about 25 so it's hard to figure it out correctly).

Not to mention my teeth. Every time (and there has been a few of them now) I have to get a crown I age about 20 years. I'm at the point soon that I'll beg her just to take the lot out and have done with it.

I'm 43. There's a woman the same age at our work going through IVF and I couldn't even begin to imagine having the energy to be pregant and cope with a baby.

Oh and my mother has taken to approving of my new shoes, as they look so comfortable and sturdy .

Oh and I have started to look with interest at those magazines that come free with the Sunday papers as some of the devices for sale look interesting and useful.

Nothing starts the day off like a lecture on vaginal dryness...
The last time I went for a smear I got a comment on how you could never tell I had given birth to 3 children, apparently I am very neat for my age too... It's a good job I have known and loved this nurse since I was a teenager
I'm 36. With a neat vagina...

I was told by the (very young) optician that the issue I'm having (having to hold written things at arms length to read) is natural due to my age! I'm only 46!

a lot of drs ime are patronising in general, i wouldn't take it to heart, but a pointed remark might not have been out of place!

I decided recently to buy some new make up to replace the stuff I've had in my make up bag for the last 10 years... I happily pitched up to the make up counter at Boots, only to be informed by the hideous old hag behind the counter that there was a "marvellous new range for over 40's". . I'm 39.

(I bought it as I was so mortified and embarressed - it was rubbish and gave me spots.)

I used to be proud of my 'pretty hands', you know. THey are turning into hideous old-lady claws before my very eyes.

Oh well, tomorrow night I will at least be partying with some friends where the ages will range from 20s to 60s and there will be some serious misbehaviour as none of us are really grown ups...

SGB - are you me?!

Or am I you?!

Either way, you're not alone.

I get sholley envy.

I like cardigans.

I'm 43.

My dd (18) used to take the piss out of my affection for knitwear but I have converted her. She even prefers sensible, comfortable shoes and has ditched her ridiculously high wedges as they give her blisters. We have both been known to say 'ooooh those look comfy' when shopping.

Ill join you too.
I went to the opticians last week.
He kept banging on about my "significant birthday" at the end of last year and then told me that I needed tests for glaucoma, eye pressure and a retinal photo...all due to my great age.
I am 40.
Bastard.

Flobbadobs

Oh yes. I was looking at sholleys the other day thinking how convenient they were. WTF! I'm 42.

The optician has told me it won't be long before I need bi-focals. Thanks for that you twat

Arthritis is kicking in and a suspected dowagers hump. I truly am turning into my mother.

ANd today I took DS to a local model railway show. As we were paying to get in, the ancient fart behind the desk said to DS 'And mind you look after Grandma in there.' He caught the look on my face and went, 'Or is it mummy, then?'

Fucking hell. Have I suddenly aged about 20 years in the space of about a month? While we were in the show, another old fart started telling me about the signs on his railway layout 'Like the ones they had in the 1950s when you were young...'

DS' father can take him to fucking model railway shows in future.

Oh the absolute bastards! I'd be fuming if anyone ever referred to me as 'Grandma' and they'd be getting a swift tongue lashing. Not in a good way either.

Don't worry about the model railway person. He probably doesn't get much of a look at females so is out of practice. Have never felt so exposed as I have at model railway shows. If you aren't a male over 60 with elbow patches, or under 13 you are an exotic interloper.

I hear you about the down-by problems.

I have ashopping trolley and it is tremendous.

Prevents lumbago too.

We bought my SIL a shopping trolley for her christmas present she is early 50s.

She asked for it so she can cart round her WW stuff as she recently became a group leader.

I lost my pants at last night's party and said 'well whoever finds them I haven't wet them' which is just what you say, really. All the youngsters thought was hilarious. I'm not incontinent yet either.