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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

It's totally unreasonable for a parent to yell at me at beavers

72 replies

ChoudeBruxelles · 06/03/2013 21:08

Because her little darling didn't get a badge as he didn't do the work towards it?

I volunteer ffs to help run it.

OP posts:

Original poster

ChoudeBruxelles · 08/03/2013 20:00

Well - stupid autocorrect

OP posts:

foslady · 08/03/2013 21:33

Part of me feels like you've got a result there, OP, but more of me feels sorry for her son, I mean, he's been told an incorrect version of the truth and will think that he was never awarded a badge he should have had (not!) and now can't have the fun that he's had with you all at Beavers.

Could I take the liberty of slightly hijacking your thread to say a massive thank you to everyone who gives their time to the Guiding and Scout movement? As you may know, there's just me and dd (she does see her dad, but it's not the same as him being at home). All her friends have the 'traditional' family set up - both parents at home, siblings, so at time I worry about her social development, and worry in case the close bond we have can stifle her. Thanks to her attending Rainbows, Brownies and as of a couple of weeks ago, Guides she has her guiding 'sisters' and has her own 'safe' independence, the one thing I alone cannot give her (and yes, I have profusely thanked all her Badgers/Brown Owls/Leaders!). thanks to the movement she has had experiences I couldn't give her - camping with others around her age, even going abroad to Disney Paris - and has benefited so much from these experiences. Because of our close bond, despite being asked about going into uniform I have held back as I do not want to encroach on her time, but instead have volunteered on the rota and (with approval from BO) done crafting sessions and a badge with the group which I thoroughly enjoyed.
She's lucky enough to be going to Poacher this year for the week, something we are both looking forward to, because I know when she comes back yet again she will have had an amazing time, with amazing people doing amazing things.

So thank you. Genuinely

JammySplodger · 08/03/2013 22:08

That's lovely Foslady :)

pigletmania · 08/03/2013 22:24

My dd 6 has asd and has just joined rainbows, she loves it and the leaders are great. I dident know it was voluntary

exoticfruits · 08/03/2013 22:30

All voluntary pigletmania- you can become one yourself - it is good fun!

exoticfruits · 08/03/2013 22:31

If you want to, that is. You can just be a non uniformed helper too if you wish.

NigelMolesworth · 08/03/2013 22:45

It is good fun - despite all my moans and groans about it, I love it! I have made some wonderful friends, the (majority of) the children are lovely and most parents are supportive. It's really the odd one or two that rile me!

A thank you goes a long way so thank you foslady!

BanjoPlayingTiger · 08/03/2013 22:53

I know this isn't what the thread was about, but I'd like to echo what foslady said.

My kids have been in scouting since just before they were 6 and its been fantastic. We have just moved house and being able to move scout troop easily has been a godsend. It has meant the kids have settled in here better and have made friends quickly. The leaders of this troop and the previous one regularly went above and beyond anything you'd expect of them and were just fantastic.
My kids wouldn't be who they are today without those leaders and the scouting organisation as a whole.

So Thank-you to all of you who spend time week in, week out preparing and providing activities you are very much appreciated!

NigelMolesworth · 08/03/2013 22:54

BTW Chou, at least that creates a space for someone else who might appreciate it more...but sad for her son as she is just else setting him up for a life of disappointment

Pilgit · 08/03/2013 23:00

Guide Guider here - totally not being unreasonable. But you're lucky the parents actually care - some of my parents have readily admitted that they don't know if their children actually turn up as they don't see them from school ending till when they get home (circa 9.30 on a school night). Although perhaps my bitterness at being treated like a very cheap babysitter is shining through...?

pigletmania · 08/03/2013 23:04

I think I will once ds 13 monts is older, I was thinking about that

pigletmania · 08/03/2013 23:06

I don't care as long as dd is happy which she is ad lives t. Ts good that the wafer works with autistic Chidren in her day job So is used to children like dd

pigletmania · 08/03/2013 23:08

Meant leader not wafer doh. Don't care abut badges etc I just want dd to be happy there

ATruthUniversallyAcknowledged · 08/03/2013 23:09

Anyone else suspect she has seen thIs thread? The apology & removal seem, um, coincidental.

exoticfruits · 09/03/2013 07:21

I suspect that she had a good moan to someone and they told her that you can't shout at volunteers but you don't have to send them if you don't like it.

kerala · 09/03/2013 09:55

Echo Foslady. Of all the activities DD does Rainbows is her favourite. As far as I can tell they run around a hall screaming the leaders must be saints to endure that. I had so many amazing experiences whilst a Brownie and Guide am considering stepping up...just not sure my nerves can take it!

thefirstmrsrochester · 09/03/2013 10:14

yy foslady
Volunteers don't get paid, not because they're worthless, but because they're priceless.

Maryz · 09/03/2013 11:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sirzy · 09/03/2013 12:04

I'm a youth leader with a different organisation and you will always get the parents who expect their child to get everything without putting the work in, or who see it as cheap babysitting.

But a lot of parents are fantastic and support their child and go above and beyond what is expected.

pigletmania · 09/03/2013 14:00

Thanks Maryz they are fantastic with her and she really enjoys it and keeps wanting to go back. Just started her in a dance group freestyle/disco which she is loving. It is very relaxed and te dance teacher is great. Thank goidness for her DLA as we would not be able to afford to go with all the taxis and uniform

pigletmania · 09/03/2013 14:01

I need to start learning to drive again

worley · 09/03/2013 14:08

just saying thankyou too for the beavers :) ds2 has ADHD.. where's at school he's labeled as the naughty one, at beavers he thrives on the activites and loves the doing and making things..he just got his science badge and is now convinced he is a "proper" scientist..
he goes to a different group than the children in his school so he has a different circle of friends..
OP, I read the parent has emailed to say she's removing her son. such a shame for the boy but maybe a relief for the leaders. you don't need toxic parents at the group.

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