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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be worried about how much I swear under my breath?

21 replies

foxache · 04/03/2013 18:33

And the general unpleasant chuntering that goes on in my head?
"fucks sake...you prick...why don't you piss off (to the tea towel which wouldn't unfold) etc".

I'm worried it will all come out one day and already find myself standing in the street on the school run swearing at drivers who don't indicate when we're trying to cross, or mouthing into their wing mirrors, "fucking indicate" - then I'm back to normal conversation with ds.

It's not the swearing - I swear a bit but am generally a mild person - but the unpleasantness. I'm not angry or anything.

My friend says it's just below the surface for everyone, but is it? Is there any way to break the habit?

OP posts:

Smartiepants79 · 04/03/2013 18:37

I do this! All the time. Especially in the car.
Mine has definitely got stop now tho' because my 2 year old can repeat everything!

bulletwithbutterflywings · 04/03/2013 18:38

I do this. Rage is my default setting I think

SPsFanjoTheBigStickyHaribo · 04/03/2013 18:38

I do this!

In my mind random objects become dickheads if out loud swearing isn't appropriate

WorraLiberty · 04/03/2013 18:41

I do this all the time too

I also worry that someone I don't really like will say hello to me, and I'll nod and mutter 'twat' out loud

Blankiefan · 04/03/2013 18:42

I felt my under-my-breath (and outright) swearing was getting a bit much so I implemented a swear box. I put an IOU of 50p in it everytime I swore and at the end of the month, wrote a cheque to a charity I support.

It made me more aware of the frequency and helped me to self-monitor. I still chuffin' swear when the situation calls for it now - but definitely less than I was doing!

Original poster

foxache · 04/03/2013 18:49

Oh you're good Blankie, I guess it's good to make yourself aware of the frequency.

I do worry too, that I'll say it to the wrong person, they're such default words in my head now. Earlier, the Tesco man was ten minutes late, we had a nice smiley conversation, he was apologetic and left - then I turned to the cat and said 'what a prick'. The man was really nice! I am so horrible

I don't feel rage or contempt, I do it more when I feel a bit stupid I think.

OP posts:

threebats · 04/03/2013 18:49

I do this.
Under my breath and otherwise. To be fair, around where I live, we all swear like sailors, its something I grew up with. I have tried to check it in past years substituting words with fecking and calling people cheese breaths when I know I am about to shoot out a terrible word and strangers are listening! I am aware its not very classy and it makes me look as if I am so badly educated I have to resort to swearing to get my point across to complete uh, idiots - (just swore in my mind) but - I do try to not do it out loud
I hit a pot hole on my way home from college run this evening, my tyre was almost flat by the time I got home - now that was a swearing incident... I still can't think about going to get a new tyre tomorrow without my mind going ballistic with disgusting language.

INeverSaidThat · 04/03/2013 18:52

I thought I was home alone when I got incredibly frustrated with my computer which led to me shouting at it. I called it a long and descriptive stream of very colourful words............

Then,

I remembered that my lovely, sweet, extremely religeous cleaner was working around the corner

I was mortified and very apologetic.

My DH never swears. The bastard.

Original poster

foxache · 04/03/2013 18:57

That's what I worry about, that my pretend nice persona will be blown. Or I'll be at the roundabout sticking two fingers up and swearing at a car and it'll be the headteacher or something.

I like the idea of word substitution

OP posts:

HumptyDumptyBumpty · 04/03/2013 18:58

YANBU. I do this ALL the time. It's like a safety valve, keeps you sane!

digerd · 04/03/2013 19:16

I have a few curse words - mostly old-fashioned ones, which I say out loud mainly at home alone, when I've done something stupid , dropped or knocked something over, or lap-top going really slow and messing me about. Or I can't find something.

When I locked myself out a few weeks ago, I immediately burst out with ' oh,shit.' Then found my neighbour who has a spare key had already buggered off somewhere, so said it again 3 times without the oh.

My dad used to use bugger in various ways including' silly old bugger' meaning idiot.
Mild cursing is bloody hell with me. Or sod it.
.
My older ladies at the dance class raised their eyes when I said I had been told a load of 'bullshit,' by someone. Crap I also say in that context.
Think I must tone it down in their presence and say 'rubbish'.

SashaSashays · 04/03/2013 19:24

I do this all the time. However I'm really happy with it because its a change in my previous behaviour which was swearing out loud.

Nearly everyone I grew up with swears all the time, my parents are the worst and it is my default. "Where the fuck are my arseholing keys?" Probably falls from my lips at least twice a day, and thats not even me being angry. Any inanimate object can become a pice of shit, I will accuse the pets of being dickheads and bastards.

DH and I swear all the time if its just us, but after one of our DC told us we swear sooooo much, we have tried to keep it in check, so now I swear much more under my breath than out loud.

I think you're not harming anyone and its probably a bit of release for you. Better to say it than keep it bottled up.

hiddenhome · 04/03/2013 19:24

I gave up swearing for Lent and it is killing me I fell off the wagon on this site last night

DrinkFeckArseGirls · 04/03/2013 19:39

I do it all day long. Worse when I'm ovulatibg, before or duribg my period. So that's 2 to 3 weeks out of month.

HarleyQuinn · 04/03/2013 20:56

I swear loads, must try and tone it down as my 21 month old DS uttered "fuck" when a toy of his fell on the floor

Notfootball · 04/03/2013 21:01

I mutter "mofo" at the end of most conversations.

Original poster

foxache · 04/03/2013 21:16

mofo

Now I'm getting paranoid at people muttering knobhead or something after I've spoken to them. I didn't realise it was quite so prevalent, although it is comforting to know. So we're all Linda Blair/Malcolm Tucker underneath then?

OP posts:

PoppyWearer · 04/03/2013 21:24

I do this too!

I put it down to working in a very male environment for about ten years, part of it in the City, part of it in the States. Lots of swearing. It became normal.

I am paranoid about the DCs hearing me.

ErrorError · 04/03/2013 22:06

My usual muttering swears include "bastard!" when I hurt myself, and "fuck the fuck off" when I drop something. I'm usually really good at reserving my swears for opportune moments when the context is just right, but have occasionally let the odd little fuck or shit slip out! Swearing is much more satisfying when you use it wisely! Got to be careful now because a close friend's DS has just turned 1 and is starting to form words.

Heard a story from a friend where in the Doc's waiting room there was a mother and small son, who kept saying "fuck off!", Mother replied "yes DS, that is a bad cough." She was fooling no-one!

aquashiv · 04/03/2013 22:14

Since having children I want to swear loads and am forced not to for fear that they will hear me and turn ferril and be on crack pipe by the time they are 8.

Does anyone know the Latin for feckityfeckdenialitus

MrsCosmopilite · 04/03/2013 22:20

I can restrain myself when necessary but I do hurl abuse at inanimate objects that won't cooperate. Like the cunt of a washing up brush that fell off the hook for the billionth time.

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