to think this bloke will never get a date through online dating with an attitude like this? Should this be allowed?

[VictorTango]

Here is his answer to this question:

topperharley77 explained his answer publicly
Q: No means NO!
A: A No is just a Yes that needs a little convincing!
Explanation: ?But all you feminists are safe. I would not touch you with a ten foot pole.?

I mean honestly???

I feel like messaging him and pointing out that no women is ever going to touch him with a ten foot barge pole

I'd message him with 'How nice of you to publicly advertise your stance on rape. How else would women know to avoid you?'.

Cunt.

No he won't ever get a date

Yes it should be allowed

If it wasn't, how would everyone know to avoid him like the plague?

What UserError said.

What a twat.

Agree with UserError, at least he's upfront about his rapey tendencies so women will know to avoid.

Wonder how that would go if he were to be tried for raping an internet date?

Goodness me, what a catch.

Lots of this foul abuse on here this evening, I would let the thread run for a days and then email him a link.

Tbh someone like that wouldn't give a shiny shit if we find his response abhorrent. He will just group every woman not interested in him into his mental "feminist/lesbian" box.

Id let it lie and not give it the satisfaction of getting a rise out of you.

Agree it's better if the person are upfront and shows what a total wankstain they are because they don't know any better, you can see them a mile off then.

The dangerous ones are those who come on the scene with a completely plausible and reassuring patter, only to draw you in so much that you don't notice they've normalised the torture and abuse of you.

Don't message him, he'd relish the attention.

I'm not going to message him.

The thought of engaging in any sort of conversation with this man makes my skin crawl.

I just struggle to believe that it's 2013 when I see attitudes like this.

'if the person is upfront' (although I'm concerned that other posters thinking I don't know my grammar has bothered me enough to post a correction )

We knew you knew Agent - It's just that Friday night wine! Gets us everytime.

my excuse anyway

Very generous of you VT

I can delude myself it was the result of changing the sentence half way through, but you're most likely right

Oh, I know we shouldn't feed the troll, poke the lion or whatever. It's just satisfying to think of the responses we should give to wankstains like that. Fully agreed that he'd just automatically think 'feminist/lesbian' like the ignorant fucker he is.

It has to be said that SOME women say no when they want to be wooed into saying yes

No it doesn't have to be said. Because it's a rape myth.

'It has to be said that SOME women say no when they want to be wooed into saying yes. I know that's going to upset some people but it's true. But there's a difference between that kind of no and a definite no means no that men should understand. '

And there's a difference between the realities of what actually happens in everyday life, and what happens in a Hollywood movie from the 1950s.

Unless you're suggesting there are various degrees of the meaning of 'no' and only some men are lucky enough to be able to instinctively tell when it actually means yes?

HillBilly, you are quite at odds with reality.

So relieved to be a feminist if it means old Topper keeps his pole far away from me.

Sad thing is, he probably will get dates. Gobby tossers always seem to manage it

No means No Hillbilly.

It's not complicated.

What you're talking about Hill, isn't on the same time scale as the one the rape myth is based on.

I wasn't too keen on DH when I first knew him, I thought he was a right cheeky bastard trying it on and told him so, but as I got to know him over time I realised what kind of person he actually is.

That is completely different to a situation where a man tries it on with a woman after a date and they say no thanks, but the man has it in his mind that she can't possibly mean that because he's paid for her drinks all night, they've talked about their families, she's suggested they might meet up for another date, she fucking owes him and he's going to collect.

Can you understand how the two are not the same?

The line is sex.

Why yes.

It's called 'saying no'.

HTH, hillbilly76.

i think these days it is 100% best that if a woman says no in any respect to just walk away. it is one thing to have the guts to speak to a woman and try and get a date (a bit old school for these days but i hear it is still done) but i do not feelit is a good situation to be in for a man or a woman. for a woman there is the obvious concern of what all the adverts say (i dont even like to say the word) and for the man the risk that if he is not that horrible man that he could be impicated and these things are taken very seriously these days (and quite rightly so). In short no means no and men should walk away the second the word is even implied. If a woman wants to get to know you then she will let you know. Thats what i think anyway!

Actually, Hillbilly, it's quite easy. If you get a 'no' you scale down your request, and then you scale it down again and then you walk away. So: you get a 'no' to sex: you back off and then you ask for another date, if you want one and really feel desire for the particular individual. If you get a 'no' without explanation or offers of an alternative day and time, you walk.