Can't get used to my Reception child being at school and I feel a bit sad

[VillaEphrussi]

Just that really. He's happy at school and we've met lots of lovely people, but I just feel sad about not being with him as much as I want to. Does anyone else feel like that? I don't want to mention it to other parents because it sounds a bit morose when actually there's nothing to complain about.

If you felt like this, did it get better?

I felt like this, and it got better. Now it's normal.

It's a tough chapter to close.

My dd started in September. I was over it by week 2. But then she'd been in nursery since a baby and I was used to being away from her.

Thanks for the replies. It is hard. How long did it take you Saski?

I feel like this about my eldest. She's off to secondary in September and I'm dreading it. Starting primary didn't bother me, but starting secondary is really upsetting me.

My baby off into the big wide world of secondary school and before I know it, she'll be gone

I'm not normally so maudlin but we get our offers tomorrow and I don't want to accept she's going

There's a little boy in a playgroup we go to who looks just like my ds did when he was a bit younger, and it sets me off every time he's there. We saw him today. I just can't reconcile myself with spending time with other children while someone else is with mine.

Ah freddie, that must be tough! I don't want to accept that he's meant to be there.

Because he's a summer baby in the back of my head I keep thinking that I could just take him out and keep him with me, as he's still four, but I know that's just me being selfish. He wants to be there. I'm being silly... and maudlin!

I feel the same. I didn't when my ds went but felt very sad when my dd went in September and still do. I don't know when I'm supposed to get over it. Sorry, not much help I know.

I am being bright and breezy and positive about it, as I think she's a bit daunted as well, but I don't want her to go

I made a complete arse of myself a couple of weeks ago, I was watching Mamma Mia and the song Slipping Through My Fingers had me in floods of tears. DH thought I'd taken leave of my senses

Glad to hear I'm not alone. They've just woken each other up and tipped a potty over, so I'm going to have to disappear but thanks for the reassurance.

My DS is in Yr1 and I still miss him. He is one of the youngest in his class so when he was in Reception year I felt a bit robbed, I.e if he had be born 2.5 months later I would have had another year with him.

It does get better in that you get used to it. I would suggest throwing yourself into understanding school life in terms of practically what he is learning about etc. However, you have got to be careful not to be too involved as you don't want him to become your hobbie.

I miss DD like crazy too and she is the oldest in her year so I was lucky to get an extra year with her. She wishes she was still at home and I wish I was a lottery winner so I could home school her!

I miss my DD too. She's still only 4 as well. Perhaps because they are young ones in the year we subconsciously feel we should have them at home until they are 5 like autumn born children

X-post with Ali disproving my theory :)

Me too, constantly wish DD was born 2.5 months later so she would have spent more time at home and not been at the younger end of the year group

Yes I felt like this with all of mine.

I don't think it gets better because you will feel the same when he moves to Juniors, Secondary School, does his first residential trip, tells you he's rather see his mates than spend an afternoon with you, goes to uni, gets married etc.

But you do get used to it, and of course you can take comfort in the fact that this is an entirely natural process (unless you want a Timothy Lumsden character) and take pride in watching him turn into a wonderful young adult eventually.

In the meantime, make the most of the weekends and school holidays - lovely memories and shared experiences to think back on when he's a surly teen.

What a lovely, thoughtful post, thanks adeuca, and thanks all for your replies. I can't even imagine his first residential trip! I'll be that parent flying out to collect him like I heard someone did last week!

I don't want a Timothy Lumsden character, and I know it's great for him to be with his friends and finding his feet in the world, but I can't believe how quickly the time has gone and how I suppose he keeps needing me less and less. (I'm filling up just typing that... freddiefrog that sounds like me. We've got to bring a photo of our child when they were a baby to school tomorrow and even that gives me a wobbly bottom lip!

I wish that too, ali, but it's probably for the best that I can't! I've always felt, from the moment that he was born, that I could spend the rest of my life just in a room, looking at him and talking to him, and although people tell me that after a while that would change (my mother in particular) it never has. I would really always prefer to have him next to me, whatever we're doing.

Anyway, I got to have an extra, unexpected hour with him and dd on Thursday night with the potty drama, so I'll just take every snatched moment I can! Thanks for sharing x

Yes I felt the same but only for the first few weeks. Once they settle it is fine and you begin to enjoy the time to yourself (if you are SAHM) and look forward to them coming home.

lovely poem

Aah Jamie that one gets me in my throat. He doesn't belong to me, but he's the most precious gift in my life (along with my dd) and I suppose I like being in his reflected light.

I'm glad you felt better about it quickly jelly. I, too, look forward to collecting him - it's the best part of the day!