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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to tell people off who park in parent & child spaces but have no children with them?

557 replies

Ameybee · 28/02/2013 15:47

This does my head in when I'm struggling to get 2 kids out the car in a normal space yet some idiot without kids is parked in the child space!!

I told a lady off today! I said 'do you know this is a parent & child space?' She said 'yeah' I replied 'so you're just being inconsiderate then?' She thought about it then made up some bullshit about her child being 'down there, in that shop!!' - she had just driven in!!! Clearly lying. So, would you say something to someone!???

OP posts:
OutsideOverThere · 28/02/2013 18:43

I think babies getting rained on is among the least of the worries mentioned on here. In fact it hasn't been mentioned at all, has it?

TantrumsAndBalloons · 28/02/2013 18:45

It usually is outthere

Very valid reason not to park in a normal space.

FutTheShuckUp · 28/02/2013 18:47

If I parked in a P&C space with no child and they issued me a 'penalty' I would not pay and nobody would be able to make me. Hardly a deterrant

thebody · 28/02/2013 18:48

I childminded 4 chikdren last year and have had 4 of my own.

My parents are old and doddery and they need to park nearer the shops than I do.

Disabled people need more spaces. Parents don't.

Get a bloody grip and put them in the trolly straight from the car.

If kids are running into the path of cars then bloody restrain them with reins or hold their hands or shock horror discipline them and teach them road safety.

fallon8 · 28/02/2013 18:48

I managed to get four kids in a supermarket without parking at the first checkout,so can you,,if I was designing a supermarket car park,I would put those spaces right at the back,to make kids get the exercise

OutsideOverThere · 28/02/2013 18:49

Right so shall we sum up?

  1. Disabled trumps parent-with-child in any respect
  1. Parent with tiny child/baby trumps parent of school aged or teenage child, nuff said
  1. It ain't about getting wet
  1. SOME car parks have tiny spaces meaning physically getting out the car when pregnant/having baby seat etc is impossible
(not all - and if yours doesn't, bully for you! But some do)
  1. walking a long way with a baby seat is shit and very bad for you esp if you have had a section etc (or have other errant children to hold on to/chase)
  1. People's children DO occasionally cause damage to other cars despite best efforts/child locks etc (best invention ever) which is another reason for P&T
  1. If you have no small children and no other reason to be parking there other than sheer convenience then your need does not trump that of a parent with a child, because they too want convenience, PLUS they have a small child
  1. Being nearer to the shop does obviously reduce likelihood of children being injured in car park

Is that everything?

OutsideOverThere · 28/02/2013 18:50

'Get a bloody grip and put them in the trolly straight from the car.'

how do you accomplish this without parking right next to the shop? Do you leave the kids in the car while you go and get the trolley?

NayFindus · 28/02/2013 18:50

It doesn't Beer but P&C are on walkways, so you can tell them to stay on the walkway. You can't do that if you have to park at the edge of the car park where there are no pedestrian walkways.

nellyjelly · 28/02/2013 18:50

It is the sense of entitlement some people have about parking in the p and c spaces. By this I mean those who DON'T have kids with them. I wouldn't dream of being lazy and parking there to the detriment of people with babies.

TantrumsAndBalloons · 28/02/2013 18:51

9 if not being able to park in a P&C parking space upsets you to the extend that you cannot control your child or get out of the car, you are probably better off doing your shopping online.
And avoiding all car parks in case it happens again.

OutsideOverThere · 28/02/2013 18:52

this is it Nelly. I have three kids including said baby. I never park in P&T unless I have a child with me. It's common courtesy on my part surely?

And I'd like to be able to expect that from others too.

NayFindus · 28/02/2013 18:52

or shock horror discipline them and teach them road safety

What, and a 2 year old will understand that?

TantrumsAndBalloons · 28/02/2013 18:53

Nay then tell them to stand in a safe place. Next to you. Next to the car.
What's the big deal?

I don't get it. Or if you can't do that invest in reins.

FutTheShuckUp · 28/02/2013 18:53

To the detriment?
Come on, it doesn't equal a life time of ill health and woe due to having to park in a normal space- I mean some people (not me!) would say you were lucky just to have a car to park in a space at all!

OutsideOverThere · 28/02/2013 18:53

Tantrums, no one is saying we NEED these spaces or we can't go shopping. We're saying they make life easier.

Hell, they are making the person with no kids who needs the cashpoint's life easier so why not ours?

TantrumsAndBalloons · 28/02/2013 18:57

So if you don't need it, if it's just to make life easier what's the drama?

That's what I don't understand.

People are saying they have to park there because they cannot keep their DCs safe otherwise, it's ludicrous.

If there's a space, park in it. If not, park elsewhere.

I'd like to park directly outside my house every night after work. It would make my life easier. But I don't scream and shout about people parking in the space outside my house. I park up the road a bit.
And none of my children have ever run into the road because of that.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 28/02/2013 18:57

Objecting to something, like parent-and-child spaces, that make parents' lives a bit easier, seems really petty to me. Of course they aren't vital, in the way that disabled spaces are, but they make shopping a bit easier.

OK, so I can't park as close to the store as I used to be able to when the dses were little and were with me - but that genuinely doesn't upset me. I am not jealous of parents using P&C spaces - it is no skin off my nose, and helps them a bit.

Honestly - why are some people so mean-spirited?

NayFindus · 28/02/2013 18:58

What's the big deal?

The big deal is I'm not a robot, and neither are kids. Sometimes I'll forget the reins, sometimes they'll bolt at the most inconvenient moments. If the supermarket wasn't so greedy they could make decent size spaces or put more pedestrian walkways in. Or both. And the one that has is the one I shop at :)

Original poster
Ameybee · 28/02/2013 18:59

Tantrum - its not about not being able to remove a child in a 'normal space' its the point of - why should some one (not disabled or otherwise) park in that space when they don't have a child?

And If there really was no need for the p&c spaces like lots are implying then why the f*ck do SO many shops provide them????!

All I'm suggesting us that people who don't need them be considerate and don't use them and I don't see how anyone can argue with that??!

Yes I didn't know the lady who used one today wasn't actually disabled but surely if she was she a)would of used a disabled bay or b) said so and told me to mind my own business???! I don't believe for one minute she 'had a child in the shop down there' if it had of been me & that was the case id of said 'would you like to come and see my child??! And been very pissed off!!! Instead she just mumbled whatever - guilty as charged!

OP posts:
nellyjelly · 28/02/2013 19:00

Yes mean spirited exactly. Why can't people just let parents have a little perk to make life easier? FFS.

TantrumsAndBalloons · 28/02/2013 19:00

But they haven't.

So I still don't understand the major upset this causes.

If there's a space, park in it. If not park elsewhere.

Supermarkets etc may be badly designed but honestly, it's a minute part of anyone's life.
How can one car parking space cause so much angst?

Just get on with it.

marjproops · 28/02/2013 19:01

As for online food shopping...well, can you really trust a delivery lorry that probably delivers to a few places in one go and maybe you're the last on the list and maybe it gets stuck in traffic etc by the time you get yours anything frozen/fridgey will be thawed?

give me a trip to the supermarket any day.

BTW DC is disabled Im fighting for a blue badge, until then we never park in dasabled or P&C, Im currently on crutches too, (can drive though, got bad knees) and still park in normal spaces, bet if i tried anywhere else wed be 1st to be fined, yet how do others get away with it?

OutsideOverThere · 28/02/2013 19:02

It's really basic, Tantrums. People get upset about it because the person parking there with no need to, and no child with them, is stopping someone for whom it would make life easier from using that space.

That's all really. It's selfish, and people being selfish can upset others.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 28/02/2013 19:04

It may be a minute part of life, but I can remember having small children, and how everything seemed like a struggle, and how a minute thing could just be the last straw - or how, on the other hand, a little bit of kindness, or a little thing going my way (like finding a P&C space free when I needed it) could make the day seem brighter and a bit easier.

Sirzy · 28/02/2013 19:05

But the thing is you don't know why the person is parking there so by having a go at someone you could be having a go at someone who has a very valid reason to park there and upset them. If someone is parking there because they are selfish then you telling them off isn't going to change things.

Using excuses about not being able to control your child well sorry thats not the supermarkets problem, nor is it other drivers problems. If you can't control your child in a car park then you need to learn to to keep them safe everywhere.

I still stand by my earlier comment that they should be at the back of the car park.

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