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AIBU?

to report neighbour to landlord for smoking weed?

135 replies

alisunshine29 · 27/02/2013 23:07

DD was playing in the garden tonight and our neighbour and some boys were smoking weed. I've smelt it many times before but hadn't realised that's where it was coming from - she has a 2 year old who was also out in the garden so hadn't suspected her at all. If it wasn't for her having a child there, and my children having to breath the smoke in if they want to play in their own garden, I'd mind my own business but now I'm thinking of reporting her to our joint landlord. AIBU?

OP posts:

Report

garlicbrain · 28/02/2013 08:03

Erik, why on earth should the neighbour desist from smoking in her own garden if OP chooses to be out in hers? If my next-door asked me not to smoke outside, I'd ask her to go elsewhere!

garlicbrain · 28/02/2013 08:04

... I have got a cute mental picture of the two of them popping in & out their back doors now, like one of those weather clocks

twofingerstoGideon · 28/02/2013 08:05

now I'm thinking of reporting her to our joint landlord. AIBU?
Joint landlord. Snigger.

Seriously, though, as someone else has said - better the devil you know. If this is the worst she's doing it doesn't sound too bad. Sure you could end up with someone nicer, but you could end up with loud, thumping music, unpleasant twats, etc...

ScarletLady02 · 28/02/2013 08:05

Just speak to her. Explain that the smoke is making your children cough and would she mind not smoking when they're outside.

veganvenelope · 28/02/2013 08:07

Op, Yanbu! Cannot believe the amount of ppl telling you yabu. Your neighbour is a slank and a bad patent fíe smoking weed in front of her child, its an addictive, carcinogenic substance. Your garden shoulsd be a nice place for you and your children to sit in and play in, not where you are forced to inhale some selfish cows illegal drugs! I would grass her up, you absolutelt should not have to tolerate that. Cannot believe the hård time youve got here, though many on here are just hård Wired to say yabu regardless of the issue!

Chattymummyhere · 28/02/2013 08:18

Yabu

Just ask her nicely is she would mind smoking at the bottom of her garden near the other side while your little one is out as its affecting them and making them cough.. If you come across as having an issue with the weed to her you will get no where just be nice and friendly to her.

babiesinslingsgetcoveredinfood · 28/02/2013 08:30

vegan tobacco is addictive and carcinogenic. Wasn't actually sure that weed itself was either (the tobacco used as a vessel is...)

lottiegarbanzo · 28/02/2013 08:43

The issue for you is her smoking in her garden, in such a way that it affects you. You should talk to her, exactly as you would if her cigarette smoke was bothering you. Be prepared for her to point out that she is outdoors, which is usually considered acceptable smoking space.

Much better for her children that she's doing it in the garden than indoors in the same room as them. Again that's equally true of smoking cigarettes.

someoftheabove · 28/02/2013 08:47

I think the jury's still out on whether cannabis is addictive or not, but is certainly seems to be habit-forming, which could lead to dependency. The harmful effects listed for cannabis on the Talk to Frank website are more wide-ranging than for tobacco, and of course, if you've got both in the mix, that's even worse.
I don't think this post is about weed, though. I think it's about how to approach a delicate subject with a neighbour so that you can continue with a good relationship in the future. I would agree that just making a reasonable request in a pleasant manner has to be the way forward, for this and any other issues that come up.

WandaDoff · 28/02/2013 08:54

If that's the worst thing she does, then you are lucky.

Just have a quiet word with her if it is bothering you. You would be very unreasonable to report her to the landlord for it without even attempting to speak to her.

DeepRedBetty · 28/02/2013 08:57

I'm constantly amazed by the attitude that cannabis is harmless. No-one on here other than me ever actually had a family member develop cannabis psychosis? However that's by the by... OP tell your neighbour nicely that the pong from her joints is stinking your garden out and makes your kids cough. She probably doesn't realise how smelly it is and how far it carries.

leaharrison11 · 28/02/2013 09:03

I cant believe how blunt people are being on this thread ! OP simply asked a question and then gets told to take the stick out of her arse. I think MNetters should say YABU or YANBU but there is no need to be nasty.

I completely understand how you feel my neighbour smokes it in the summer and i cant put my DS clothes on the line because the end up stinking of bloody stuff and i also dont let him play in the garden of they are smoking it i take him to the park or to nanas big garden, i believe children should be kept away from drugs and if that mean i have a stick up my arse to then im happy its there.

If i was you id speak to your neighbour to if that doesnt cut it then yes id go to landlord , if she will get thrown out thats her own fault for doing drugs and putting it around children.

someoftheabove · 28/02/2013 09:03

I'm with you on that, DeepRedBetty. I think the argument goes, alcohol and tobacco are legal and are just as dangerous, so why are people going on about cannabis. But the issue is not how dangerous it is relative to something else. It's how dangerous it is, full stop.

OverlyYappy · 28/02/2013 09:06

I have a family member with weed psychosis and YES it is addictive from what I have seen

Would I tell someone Landlord, no. I would ask them to go blow their smoke elsewhere though.

ChairmanWow · 28/02/2013 09:08

I think it's the idea of rushing straight off to the landlord that's getting people's back up. It just seems a bit underhanded and snitchy. OP asked if she was being unreasonable to be going to the landlord, in which case the answer has to be yes. They have to live next door to each other and her neighbour may have no idea it can be smelt next door.

I suspect even those who have indulged would feel it's not unreasonable to not want others to smoke near to our kids, if only because it raises some tricky issues. But that wasn't was OP was asking.

Ilovexmastime · 28/02/2013 09:09

YABU, just talk to her, no need to go telling on her. Like others have said, I doubt the landlord will care anyway.

fromparistoberlin · 28/02/2013 09:10

yes, YABU

and sanctimonious!

Altinkum · 28/02/2013 09:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AngelWreakinHavoc · 28/02/2013 09:15

YABU!

MrsKeithRichards · 28/02/2013 09:22

Bad patent slank, that's what she is.

HeySoulSister · 28/02/2013 09:29

If you create a fuss op then what will she do??

I will tell you.... She will do it indoors instead.... Where it will seep through Walls/loft/floorboards...... Which creates a BIGGER problem

Pick your battles....

pluCaChange · 28/02/2013 09:29

I'm not arguing about cannabis, which I do think is unpleasant, addictive and unhealthy (and probably wastes more time than just the time for consumption, rather like alcohol).

However, the landlord is not the one to complain to.

NC78 · 28/02/2013 09:39

Reporting her is too harsh. Just ask her not to smoke it near your kids.

babanouche · 28/02/2013 09:40

YABU. Your neighbour will probably be mellow enough to agree not to smoke when your daughter's in the garden. :)

WorraLiberty · 28/02/2013 09:44

YABU, totally.

I take it she's not blowing it directly into your child's face at close proximity?

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