To begrudge "splitting the bill" evenly?

[TheSeventhHorcrux]

Went out for a meal with a group of 15 to the local pub. I've just been fired today (that's a whole other thread but basically because I had the audacity to dislocate my knee and unable to come into work because I can't walk... I'm not bitter, honest) so I'm a bit tight on money, as I don't know when the next cheque is in.

At the end of the meal, OH and I having drank only tap water and eaten the cheapest thing on the menu, I had to stump up £30 for "our share" of the evenly split bill. I had no idea we were paying this way and kind of numbly handed over the money even though I was thinking it was going to be £14.

I know it's petty over £16 but AIBU to dislike the "even" splitting of bills and wishing that I'd had wine etc like everyone?

(feel free to give me a MN kick up the arse if necessary )

Yanbu, but you have to be assertive about what you want to pay from the start.

YANBU you paid double what your meal was worth

YADNBU. I'd be feeling the exact same way as you. If you go out with them again, order as much as you can, just because you can. Then you won't feel as bad as you won't have stuck to celery sticks and cucumber slices all night and will have had a damn fine night.

But... but...

I'm really sorry to hear you lost your job, but how did you make it to the restaurant? And why didn't you say, upon entry, "Hey, I've lost my job today so we'll take care of our own bill"? Surely you must have known if it's normally split?

I only ever split the bill. If people don't drink or have 1 course & others have two or three I'd suggest they pay less.

Sorry to hear things are so rubbish re job. Did the others know?
I know when I do the "shall we split equally" It's mainly because I'm too lazy to work it out. It really wouldn't bother me if someone said. Oh actually I'd prefer to pay for ours Seperately. Don't be afraid to say!
Hope things improve soon.

NBU but YWB meek tbh to just hand it over. If I were in your situation and felt that way about it I would have been honest and just said "Oh, i'm a bit skint and have just had XYZ so will just pay for what I ate/drank". Can't see where the issue would have been with doing that? So actually, YABU!!

YANBU. Pre-empt situations like this by saying "Here's what we owe plus tip" then leave.

When I go out for large meals, I ask people to bring CASH, pay what they think they owe (plus a tip) and if there's any shortfall, that shortfall gets split evenly. Never had a problem so far.

YABU because you should have either said "sorry, but I thought we were paying for our own, please take our bill out of the equation", or "are we splitting the bill tonight? Do you mind if we don't?".

YANBU to be upset over £30 though, that's a fair chunk of money to cough up when yours cost half. Next time, say something!

It's been a week since "the incident" and I can now hop about on crutches and get myself to the toilet and everything

This isn't how the bill is normally split and tbh if I had been asked for £15 (each) when I knew my meal was MORE than that, id have stumped up.

It's always a difficult one if you order as part of a large group though - it NEVER comes to the right amount when you ask people to put in what they paid.
You ALWAYS need to establish before ordering or even before going out that you are going to order in 4 groups of 4 or that you only order your food 'on the bill' and everyone buys their drinks at the bar, or whatever it is you are going to do, if it's not going to work out reasonably fairly by splitting it.

Yeah we were the lower wage earners in our group of friends for a long time and just had to bite the bullet and say we couldn't afford to pay for their wine and steak when we were on a tap water and burgers budget. Its harsh but unless you can afford it you need to speak up and chalk this one up to experience

It's always the one who has a starter, steak and sweet who suggests splitting the bill. I heard someone say that as she wanted a bottle of Prosecco for herself that she would put in an extra £5.

YANBU but why on earth wouldn't you just say that you want to pay your own bill. I really don't understand why people find it so embarrassing.