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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think you have to actually have a trolley or basket with some shopping in it before joining a checkout queue?

125 replies

101handbags · 25/02/2013 10:12

In Sainsbury's on Saturday, I spotted the one till that didn't have a queue and wheeled my trolley over. There was a woman standing in front of me, and a few bits & pieces left on the conveyor belt, which I naturally assumed were hers. I was just about to start unloading my trolley onto the belt when a man appeared with an overloaded trolley, pushed in front of me and said 'Excuse me, I'm with her', indicating the woman in front of me. Now, I read a lot on here about people standing in car parking spaces to reserve them, but I have never, ever heard of people reserving spaces in the checkout queue. When I look back now, I remember us both approaching the checkout from different directions and the man indicating to the woman to run ahead to get there before me. I gave him the glare from hell and went to the next till. Afterwards I felt like such a doormat. I know I should have said 'I was here with my trolley first, I am not moving' but I didn't. I know I need to be more assertive. Please tell me how you would have reacted/what you would have said?

OP posts:
livinginwonderland · 25/02/2013 10:14

i'd probably have told him to fuck off in the nicest possible way. if you're not there with your basket or trolley, you're not there at all in my eyes, and i work in a supermarket. if someone tried to reserve a space in my checkout queue, i would ask them politely to move.

MurderOfGoths · 25/02/2013 10:16

Saw someone do that at the supermarket the other day, except the bloke with the trolley was in the next queue, then when the queue his partner in moved quicker he moved over. Shoving a fairly frail old lady out of the way. Angry

Sugarice · 25/02/2013 10:17

I think I would have said 'well I'm not with her and I'm not moving' and stood my ground.

I'm snotty though and wouldn't care about a scene as he would have got my hackles raised.

ivanapoo · 25/02/2013 10:18

I think I would have just ignored him and started unloading my stuff in front of theirs. How long had you been queuing before he turned up? So rude.

mrssmooth · 25/02/2013 10:20

I would have stood my ground - if you got there before he did, with your trolley, then I'm afraid he'd have to wait ... especially if you were just about to start loading your stuff onto the belt! Cheeky sod!

HerbyVore · 25/02/2013 10:23

I think I would have just quickly put an item on the belt and said 'that's okay you can step in after me'

But in reality I probably would have given the glare too, and moved to a different checkout - I wouldn't have wanted to be in the same line as them.

foxache · 25/02/2013 10:29

I noticed this at Christmas! Not full supermarket trolleys mind, but places like poundshops, Greggs and Wilkos, long winding queues.

People stand there before they've selected anything, then are joined by a friend with an armful of stuff, then then original person will go off and select their shopping and come back. The first time it happened I was calm, by the time I got to Greggs where a woman indicated her husband to get in quick in front of me and both took turns to go and choose things, I had to walk out and go home Smile

Eskino · 25/02/2013 10:30

I think I would have laughed and asked him, "you're joking, aren't you?" Which seems to have become my stock retort in these sort of cheeky bstard situations.

ClutchingPearls · 25/02/2013 10:36

This must be a new thing started this weekend. I had it happen on Saturday. Except the man arrived ahead of me and stood with nothing to put on the belt. DD1 and 2 then just went round him to put their cakes on and I started loading behind him.

His wife arrived just in time to see him looking around at our mass invasion and then stepping aside. She gave aAngry to him and moved checkouts.

I recommend taking my DDs to tackle the problem important future, I'm happy to lend them out.Grin

ClutchingPearls · 25/02/2013 10:37

importantHmm I ment in.

foxache · 25/02/2013 10:38

It's so rude! They're saving 5, 10 minutes tops for being so pushy. Then I guess they leave the supermarket punching the air, 'we're WINNERS!!!'

nipersvest · 25/02/2013 10:42

dh got cross with a lady in aldi last weekend for doing this. she was stood in the queue, no trolley, we joined behind her and started unloading. she turned to dh and said 'i'm here first', dh retorted 'i'm so sorry, i didn't see your invisible trolley'. we moved tills, with her muttering something about 'what did you say?' when her husband arrived with their trolley. saving a place at the checkout is ridiculously petty.

fluffyraggies · 25/02/2013 10:43

It's all down to the timing and the number of bits of shopping IMO.

I am guilty of joining someone in a long queue with a few more items for the basket, on occasion. Pound shop example a good one, shopping with teen DD. But it wont have been 'pre-meditated'. It will have been because she still happens to be stood in the queue when i've finished finding my couple of bits so i join her. But that's in a long queue, as i say, and wont make allot of difference to every body else. 2 or 3 more bits in a basket half way along a long queue.

However - I would never 'hold a place' as such. And certainly not in a busy supermarket. And definately definately not with a trolly load of stuff!

That is the same as standing in a parking space. I would have been AngryShock and Hmm but would have chickened out of a confrontation and gone to the next till also.

BambieO · 25/02/2013 10:56

I would definitely carry on unloading and say 'as you have so few items in your hands none I have left you a small space ahead of me, surely you can fit it all in there' Grin

I hate hate hate stupid things like this, some people are utterly ridiculous

TheSeniorWrangler · 25/02/2013 11:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FakePlasticLobsters · 25/02/2013 11:06

OP I almost told you that I would have done the same as you, walked away and then felt annoyed with myself.

But then I remembered that a few weeks ago, at swimming lessons, a man actually pushed me as I went to sit down on an empty chair, and told me he was saving it for his wife.

I think it was the fact that he pushed me that did it, because as he draped his arm protectively over the back of the chair, I sat on it anyway.

I'm not sure which one of us was more surprised at that point. We both sat there very stubbornly for a minute, him with his arm still around me, neither of us looking at each other, until his wife walked in.

At which point he removed his arm and told one of his children to sit on his knee so their mother could sit down. Then we spent the next 30 minutes carefully not looking at each other until it was time to leave.

On my way out, one of the other parents said that he does the same thing every week and it drives everyone mad as it means other people have to stand at the back where they can't see their children in the pool. Which you need to do because another lesson starts immediately afterwards so you can't just ask the instructor how things went, you need to watch the lesson.

Apparently there have been complaints about this family taking up five spaces in the viewing area when their other three children don't even watch the swimmers, they play on phones, and there is a sign asking people not to reserve seats and to have just one parent/viewer on the platform per swimming child. There's another seating area for older siblings, extra adults that can take turns on the viewing platform.

But nobody had ever before just sat down on one of the saved but still empty seats. I got a lot of smiles and nods in the changing rooms that day. I'm still surprised when I think about it and realise it was me, sitting there, with an angry strangers arm around me in a battle for a plastic chair and a view of a three year old's swimming lesson. Blush

yuleheart · 25/02/2013 11:07

We would def go with the 'invisible items' or such comment and carry on unloading!

Actually saw this scenario in a Tesco Extra between two men ( oaps) they were really shouting at each other and their wives were stood there wishing the ground would open up and swallow them.

Everyone else was sniggering (including the staff)

carabos · 25/02/2013 11:13

DH and I do this when the supermarket is busy on the rare occasions we go shopping together. We each stand in a q, one of us has the trolley in what appears to be the fastest moving q and the other joins the next most likely looking q. We often get Hmm looks if we change lines with the trolley but frankly, I don't care.

BambieO · 25/02/2013 11:20

carabos what is the point though apart from pissing off other shoppers who wait their turn as they should?

It's extremely childish behaviour. Where does the logic end? Is your time really that much more valuable than everyone else's that you cannot just finish your shopping and join a queue as required?

wintertimeisfun · 25/02/2013 11:25

i don't think that would bother me tbh. what does bother me is when i am queing for ages to order some food in local cafe (which does't have loads of seating. young (not old, doesn't count) people come in after me, one sits down whilst the other orders leaving me (often) with nowhere to sit holding a tray with food on whilst they are sitting at a table with no food to eat Angry

Lottikins · 25/02/2013 11:29

I do that too , Although to be fair I do warn shoppers joining the queue after me that 'a big trolley is coming'.

Lottikins · 25/02/2013 11:30

I don't get the 'you think your time is more valuable than anyone else' argument because that works both ways

BreadForMyBREADGUN · 25/02/2013 11:31

It's enormously satisfying when someone does this to you, and then someone opens up the til next to you Grin

BreadForMyBREADGUN · 25/02/2013 11:31

There you go - the perfect retort. "I left my aura there"

Grin
SusanneLinder · 25/02/2013 11:38

Classic one last night, I was still uploading my shopping and this woman behind me started uploading hers when I had half a trolley to go,not leaving much room for MY stuff.I gave her the death glare but she didnt bother her butt.Next time I will say something, instead of mutterring under my breath about rude people.