to think my mother is an unreasonable, incompetent fool?

[megandraper]

She interrupted my repetitive tuneless chanting and spoon banging creative music session with banal enquiries about who wanted the last pancake.

Didn't bother replying since any idiot could see that I still had two grapes on my plate. Ate grapes. Ate little sister's grapes. Demanded Requested more milk. Informed on big brother for wiping nose on sleeve, and nodded smugly while he was reprimanded. Wailed when he made frowning face at me. Drank milk. Did colouring. Watched brother finish pancake. Considered informing on his poor usage of cutlery but got distracted by sudden pang of hunger decided to be magnanimous.

Looked round for my pancake. Plate empty! Raised alarm by means of howling. Mother failed to meet minimum response time, indeed failed even to recognise severity of situation and continued, like a blundering ostrich, to faff about at the sink. Realised she was washing up THE PANCAKE PAN! Code-black! Screamed and threw self, flailing and frothing, on the floor.

Mother's interrogation techniques so flawed she failed to ascertain even the basic facts and claimed I was tired. TIRED? If I was tired I'd have gone to sleep last night, for God's sake. Mother then callously went to work, leaving me with Grandma. Incompetence clearly genetic, as Grandma actually offered to make more pancakes. Unbelievable. Can no-one grasp that I want LAST pancake not MORE pancake?

Mother due home in an hour. AIBU to be plotting my revenge?

Signed DS2, age 3.

Ltb.

Oh yes - plot that revenge!!!
I would suggest crayons all over the walls. Obviously while showing your creative side.
Make a lot of mess at bath time - and don't sleep again tonight.
That should show her who's boss!
Very eloquent for a 3 year old - impressed!

omg.

are you too young to divorce your parents?
I would.

Soooo advanced!

she is def bu.

I think you should plot all sorts of hateful revenge, chronologically arranged to demonstrate how misunderstood you are, right up until your 18th birthday.

The woman must pay for that pancake is ways she cannot even begin to imagine.

Then you can spend the rest of your days on a therapist's couch from where you can denounce her as having ruined your life.

Climb in to mummy's bed around 1am then steal all the covers and sleep like a starfish forcing DM to sleep shivering holding on to the side of the bed so she does not fall out.

She is being vu to not understand the need for the last pancake.

I'll make you one pancake only for you at my house!

Jealous, we discovered on Shrove Tuesday that our DS doesn't like pancakes adds them to list of stuff he won't sniff at

Sleep-warfare is already covered - we have a secret rota. Tonight it's my sister's turn - we paint her cheek red and she pretends to be teething.

I specialise in massive poos that overflow the potty (won't use loo because it is clearly too high and scary).

weegiemum, can i bring my brother and sister to watch you make one pancake only for me? The whole point in getting something is that my siblings other people see they're NOT getting it, IYSWIM.