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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

is it crazed, stalkerish behaviour

39 replies

Mitchy1nge · 19/02/2013 23:37

. . . to phone the hospital where a friend has been in labour since midnight on Sunday? her partner has been updating by text message and FB along the way but not a word for the past seven hours

I know I'm being selfish, want to stop worrying and go to sleep, but it just seems too long and the silence feels ominous (even though is probably just a flat battery on phone or something)

OP posts:
catinboots · 19/02/2013 23:40

Hospital won't be able to tell you anything

Try not to worry

LeaveTheBastid · 19/02/2013 23:40

If he has been updating you, them there's got to be a good reason why he has stopped. I'd wait for them to contact you.

WorraLiberty · 19/02/2013 23:44

I agree the hospital won't be allowed to tell you anything.

I'm sure it's just a flat battery...or they're having family time.

Original poster
Mitchy1nge · 19/02/2013 23:46

oh yeah, forgot, hospital hardly likely to reassure any random caller

OP posts:
MusicalEndorphins · 19/02/2013 23:49

Perhaps baby is born and they are sleeping now?

LeaveTheBastid · 19/02/2013 23:49

Unless of course you said you were family.. But even that aside, this is their family time, it's a bit intrusive to call the labour ward to check progress. Let them make contact first. Get some sleep, I'm sure good news will come tomorrow.

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 19/02/2013 23:50

The hospital won't tell you anything. I'm sure they'll tell you when they have time. Maybe they want a bit of rest with their new baby before telling the world.

Original poster
Mitchy1nge · 19/02/2013 23:51

am I a total neurotic or would other (normal) people feel worried by now?

OP posts:
Pobblewhohasnotoes · 19/02/2013 23:54

Maybe they are telling family first and having mummy and daddy time? We didn't even tell parents until two hours after our DS was born as my placenta got stuck and I bled. Sometimes other stuff happens.

diaimchlo · 19/02/2013 23:54

No you are not a total neurotic at all you are a concerned friend. I am sure they will be in touch soon. Smile

Kickarsequeen · 19/02/2013 23:56

You may be worried and rightly so, but you really need to leave them alone either they have a flat battery or the baby is born and they don't want to be interrupted or something has gone wrong (sincerely hope not!!) and thy want to be left alone! If they wanted you to be updated they would update you.

LittleEdie · 20/02/2013 00:00

It is perfectly normal to not have friends at the forefront of your mind when you've just had a baby. You contacting anyone at this stage would be intrusive and attention seeking. Don't do it.

Original poster
Mitchy1nge · 20/02/2013 00:02

I'm going to imagine the three of them snuggled up then, and maybe wake up to the announcement and photos. This baby has been such a long time in the planning and conceiving, not that all babies aren't precious of course, it all feels a bit perilous.

I haven't been pestering for information, it was just flowing and then it stopped this afternoon. There are probably plenty of reasons that are not necessarily awful ones.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 20/02/2013 00:07

Aww I can see why you're worried if there's been a constant stream of updates

But on the bright side, she probably smacked him round the head with the gas and air cannister and told him to pay more attention! Grin

Hope you wake up to some news Thanks

Original poster
Mitchy1nge · 20/02/2013 00:10

thanks for the flowers!

(they are both women but otherwise that scenario sounds more than plausible)

I know I can't really phone the hospital, but was struggling to think of Good Reasons for the long silence.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 20/02/2013 00:15

It's ok...I found them growing in nextdoor's garden Grin

Perhaps labour has slowed down so much she's been sent home to get some rest?

Who knows, but I'd try to look at it as if her DP has made all those updates, she would probably also update if there was something wrong. Maybe she wouldn't be specific...but I'm sure she'd say something.

TheChaoGoesMu · 20/02/2013 00:19

Theres no point in worrying until you know you have something to worry about. Go get some sleep and hopefully you will have good news in the morning Thanks

Original poster
Mitchy1nge · 20/02/2013 00:21

you're probably right

you'd never think I'd done this baby stuff three times myself, plus a grandchild Hmm I was a WRECK then too, but when you're going through it yourself it just isn't that scary somehow?

OP posts:
deleted203 · 20/02/2013 00:24

Am I the only one who would be seriously fucked off by a DP who was busily texting and facebooking updates whilst I was in labour?

I don't feel the world and his wife needs a blow by blow account of me giving birth, TBH.

TheChaoGoesMu · 20/02/2013 00:30

I agree op, but when you're going through it yourself, then you know whats going on. The fear is the unknown.

Get off to bed now Grin

Tee2072 · 20/02/2013 06:21

I hope you woke up to good news!

No, not the only one, sowornout, but that doesn't mean this particular woman minds.

Matildaduck · 20/02/2013 06:32

I was quite irritated by dh texting...

Fingers crossed

Original poster
Mitchy1nge · 20/02/2013 11:22

nothing at all

it feels like something is wrong, but feelings are not always reliable are they?

OP posts:
GoSuckEggs · 20/02/2013 11:39

hope you hear soon

ImperialBlether · 20/02/2013 11:43

Sowornout, I completely agree. If there's one time in your life it should just be you and your partner, it's when you're in labour.