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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Housebuyers making me feel stabby

17 replies

ChairmanWow · 19/02/2013 12:56

Sorry, this could be a long one!

We accepted an offer on our house late last year and quickly found another property. The first one fell through (subsidence) and we worked our arses off finding another one. The buyers were calling the agent constantly to see if we'd found anywhere so we were under a huge amount of pressure.

We had an offer accepted on another house at the end of Dec and said we absolutely had to move by 15th Feb as our second is due mid-March and we have a toddler to think of.

Our buyers only instructed their solicitor 3 weeks ago despite the agent getting on their backs for weeks. My solicitor and the agent have been pushing and pushing them and we've already let the deadline slide by a week. Now I've discovered that despite having been sent the contract they havent signed it yet because, apparently, they haven't had time to read it!! Am wondering when we get time to pack up our house and move with a 2 y o in tow, or when DS gets time to settle in following the major disruption of a move before his little sis makes an appearance! I'm almost 37 weeks now.

If we don't move next week then it will be after the baby - cheeky buyers are now asking how long they'll have to wait after the birth for us to move.

I'm now so stressed and tearful about the whole thing. I should be focussing on and excited about our new baby. Instead it's just one round of chasing emails and phone calls after another. So, if we're not moved next week we're thinking of walking and putting the house back on the market at a future date. AIBU? Should I just suck it up and deal with moving with a new baby? Help!

OP posts:

lljkk · 19/02/2013 13:01

Can you get a bridging loan? YANBU to be upset about it all.

Andro · 19/02/2013 13:12

At 37 weeks pg, with a toddler and planning a move there is no feeling that can be termed unreasonable.

The question here is not whether your considerations and possible course of action are unreasonable, but whether you would regret delaying the move/losing the new property etc.

Yfronts · 19/02/2013 13:18

Tell the buyers it's either next week or in three months time? They can choose.

LittleAbruzzenBear · 19/02/2013 13:21

YANBU. What yfronts said.

Original poster

ChairmanWow · 19/02/2013 13:23

Thanks folks. I feel a bit better just getting down. It's so hard not to let my feelings run away with me. Also when my son was born we had feeding issues and he ended up back in hosp so I know it's often not plain sailing and can't imagine having this still hanging over us with the pressure of a move.

Y Fronts idea seems sensible. Takes the pressure off. So tempting to wait til we've exchanged then spring a 3 month delay on them but I guess at least one side has to behave reasonably.

OP posts:

Original poster

ChairmanWow · 19/02/2013 13:24

Just getting it down! That sounded like I was having a cheesy disco dance!

OP posts:

LittleAbruzzenBear · 19/02/2013 13:26

Maybe you need a cheesy disco dance too!

BreadForMyBREADGUN · 19/02/2013 13:28

Yep, do what yfronts said. Its the only way.

gordyslovesheep · 19/02/2013 13:30

I feel your pain - when I sold up and moved here I accepted an offer in May and needed to move by July end - moved in 18th October - buyers can be equally twatish x

hope it's sorted soon

MrsBW · 19/02/2013 13:35

You can't exchange then spring a delay on them if you're in England... The completion date will be agreed at the point of exchange and they could sue if you delay, I think I'm right in saying?

Flipping annoying though. Totally agree YANBU to say they get their act together soon, or wait... but just bear in mind they could pull out.

How much do you want the house you're buying??

soaccidentprone · 19/02/2013 13:46

we moved when ds2 was 3 1/2 months old. I am pretty sure I would have found it impossible to move when ds2 was any younger. we also had loads of help from family and friends as well as using a professional removal company.

so it depends of how much help you have etc as to what you decide

Seabird72 · 19/02/2013 15:19

So have they signed yet or not?? If they haven't signed then why are they pressurising you to give them a date?? If they haven't signed then you haven't exchanged and it's only legally binding once tyou have exchanged contracts. They could be messing you about to be honest. Get them to exchange asap and agree completion for a month afterwards - this will be awkward but far better than losing your buyers if they are serious and perhaps you could take the children and stay with a relative or something whilst your partner/hubby deals with the removals and reganising the house best he can. It's not ideal but obviously things havebeen delayed. They do sound cheeky though to have been constantly ringing but not sorting out their solicitor etc well in advance - the only other thing to remember is that once they've had their mortgage offer accepted they have to take it up and complete within 6 months or lose it.

willesden · 19/02/2013 15:56

Personally, at 37 weeks I would pull out and put the house back on the market at a later date. It is obviously the kind of house which will sell well so you shouldn't worry about that aspect. When the time does come to move, enslist the help of friends and relatives in respect of the children. Who, by the way, are very adaptable and will be absolutely fine. No-one needs this kind of stress at 37 weeks. The baby could arrive anytime now but you know that.

maddening · 19/02/2013 15:59

Can you speak to the buyers direct? Say if it isn't sorted by x date then sale cancelled?

Original poster

ChairmanWow · 19/02/2013 17:02

Update - our (completely fab) estate agent has spoken to them and told them they are being totally unfair, asked them if they've even considered the effect this is having on us and told them that not only am I heavily preg but unwell (I have PGP). Says she laid it on with a trowel and the woman said she hadn't really thought about that but now they mention it she'll get the contract in the post today. At the moment a move of early next week looks very possible.

If its after the baby I've decided I'm going to sew bits of placenta into the curtains . But seriously after the baby the move will most def be at our convenience not theirs.

We really do want the new house though. It's a bit of a bargain. Which is a bit bloody annoying!

OP posts:

Lynned · 19/02/2013 17:07

We moved when I was 37weeks pregnant. Ds was born at 38 weeks ( stress related I think). Just take good care of yourself.

MummytoMog · 19/02/2013 18:07

You are absolutely not being unreasonable, sellers can be just as bad though - ours didn't get her arse in gear and find a new house for four months, meaning I had to have my PFB in Homerton Hospital which flooded as I was giving birth and I had to be wheeled though corridors ankle deep in sewage to theatre instead of Whipps Cross how do I love thee Whipps, let me count the ways. I guess I should consider myself lucky we moved in time for me to have DS at Whipps ;). Eight months from accepted offer to move. We were cash buyers. Sigh.

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