Extra-curricular activities for DSS

[balia]

Right, just want to get a range of opinions about this...

DSS wants to start Judo lessons on a Saturday. He already does football on a weekday evening, which DH pays for, buys all kit and takes him to. However, if DH can't make it due to work, or the matches are on weekends when DSS is with his Mum, he ends up not going at least half of the time.

So, for two of the Saturday sessions it won't be a problem as DSS is with us from Friday evening. DS has swimming lessons on a Saturday morning so will take both boys out first thing, DSS can watch DS swim, then they can go on to Judo and DS can watch DSS.

But on the third weekend, DH picks DSS up on a Saturday morning. The judo session starts before pickup time, and DH can't collect him earlier because of DS's swimming lesson. DH has asked his ex to drop DSS at Judo and he will pick him up after swimming. Ex is refusing and saying that DH should collect DSS before swimming (it isn't on the way). This would mean getting DS out of the house before 7am, and as ex is invariably late, would mean DS being late/missing his swimming.

We can't really afford it anyway - we would have to cut back on something else (God knows what, these days) but to have to pay for lessons knowing that DSS will only get to about half of them seems a bit mad. Or is the whole thing completely petty?

Why can't dss stay with you the third Friday night?

Marius - I don't really know much about the whole thingy of martial arts, I just couldn't give DS exercise so enrolled him in the only sport I could physically get to, and he's really enjoyed it!

I have only heard bad things about the sort of set up where you have to pay months up front and parents aren't allowed in, but I am happy to be corrected. All I know is that DS is really happy and I know that a lot of mums are like me, really happy with the teaching their kids are getting.

But if, like me, you don't really know much, then you are a bit at the mercy of an unscrupulous instructor. Information on forums like this can be a real life line.

It's not likely she would let DSS stay with us for the extra night without a court order! In fairness, there are MH issues which mean flexibility is difficult. But DH will suggest it when they have a discussion. TBH, I feel a bit nervous about this class after reading comments and DH and I had already talked about finding a more local class. DSS has already had a go at one martial art and dropped it because he didn't make progress and now I've read everyone's comments I feel much less confident in the idea of this particular class. I'm in the North-East. Will pm, thanks for the offer.

If it's not practical for all, it is ok to say no

Children can't do all the classes and activities they want to do.

How old is DSS? Could he get himself to Judo?

Why does DSS have to miss Judo but DS doesn't have to miss swimming?

Because currently DSS already does Football and DS does Swimming.

Should DS miss out on swimming so DSS can go to Football and Swimming?

*Football and Judo?