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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to agree that wanking should be available on prescription?

84 replies

Mitchy1nge · 06/02/2013 11:24

except for feeling a bit shuddery at the concept of an NHS vibrator, maybe we could have shiny privately financed ones?

the idea whose time has come again, at last!

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ihearsounds · 06/02/2013 15:25

Depends on the school what they are taught. Dd's decondary school, the basics. The school I work, we talk about everything, including mastrubation. Could help that unlike mainstream, we have at the most 8 girls in the group and a couple of ta's that have a sense of humour.

flippingflup · 06/02/2013 15:38

Booking an appointment right now to talk to my doctor about wanking. Sure it will be a lovely conversation Grin.

Mitchy1nge · 06/02/2013 15:42

is it an emergency or routine appointment?

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MimsyBorogroves · 06/02/2013 17:29

I think it should be covered in the PSHE lessons - to normalise it and perhaps even to suggest it as an alternative to PIV sex to avoid pregnancy/risk of sti/etc

Mitchy1nge · 06/02/2013 20:09

Isn't it covered at all? thought it might at least get a mention

although think it says in that article there is not much evidence of any such benefits to public health

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StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes · 06/02/2013 20:21

lots of schools now call sex ed relationship and sex ed so they cover stuff about respectful relationships, masturbation is often mentioned in older age groups, its not all about the biology but about caring and respect. much better IMO but girls certainly should know how their bodies work and how to reach orgasm either alone or in a relationship better they hear this from a reliable safe source like a mum aunty older sister safe partner etc than from a porn site.

confusteling · 06/02/2013 20:27

The only mention we had of masturbation in sex ed consisted of this:

A video - called Living and Growing - in which a teenage lad was wittering on about puberty from his perspective. He mentioned what wet dreams were, then the scene changed to him looking lustily at a Pamela Anderson poster. The narrator then said "What about wanking?" .. The lad, whispering and grinning, said "I don't think you should call it that. Masturbation's the proper term. It's totally normal."

There was no mention of this being normal for females and males (indeed, the video was intended apparently to be shown only for boys and a separate version, featuring a teenage girl, was filmed for girls - which made no mention at all of masturbation). I've since seen a couple of other videos - when I did teacher training for a year - which explicitly talked about masturbation. It actually went as far to show a cartoon of a young woman masturbating - might be the way to go, to be honest.

At age 12 I figured out what it was, I read up my mum's DK health encyclopedia and I panicked - it said, "the normal way for lesbian women to reach orgasm is through clitoral stimulation". I thought that my anatomy was somehow broken as I had figured out that my clitoris was what enabled me to orgasm. It was More magazine that made me realise all women, regardless of sexuality, received pleasure from the clitoris.

At some stage masturbation needs to be discussed properly within sex education lessons as it's likely to be the first proper sexual experience both girls and boys have. Likely some people will think teaching young adults about sexual pleasure will raise the teenage pregnancy rates but it is very possible to understand sex, and to not fall pregnant.. If anything, the more understanding, the better education at appropriate stages, I'd reckon pregnancy and STI rates will fall.

We never ever discussed sex..We watched videos during which the teacher would stare at the floor. We discussed contraception at age 14, and we discussed fertilisation at age 12 in biology but nothing apart from that. I finished secondary in 2009 - I can't imagine things have changed much since then..

I have actually been advised to masturbate by HP before due to gynae health issues. I didn't see the advice as any different to being told to try meditation or relaxation CDs to be honest...

Mitchy1nge · 06/02/2013 21:09

that's interesting if a bit depressing

just asked my nearly 14yo if masturbation was discussed during their first round of sex ed. but she looked murderous, has not forgiven me for accidentally posting something about it on her wall (is it MY fault she left herself logged in on my iPad?)

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Mitchy1nge · 06/02/2013 23:41

just bumping for anyone who might like some bedtime reading

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Fallenangle · 06/02/2013 23:55

I wonder is WhichIs holding her book with one hand?

SirBoobAlot · 07/02/2013 00:15

NHS vibrator. Now there is a chilling way to ensure no one masturbates ever again. In my mind, it is the same grim grey colour as the crutches they lend out...

Darkesteyes · 07/02/2013 00:28

WhichIsBestWed 06-Feb-13 13:35:44

What do girls get taught?
At school, how to / how not to procreate. And from peers, which I suppose these days means porn, how to... fake enjoying whatever is good for your male partner.

Women deserve to enjoy sex. Alone or with someone else. Nobody seems to tell that to girls

THIS THIS THIS!

SaggyOldClothCatpuss · 07/02/2013 00:44

By the 19th century, masturbation had become associated with consumption, scrofula, feeble mindedness, insanity, a diminution of vision, and syphilis.
Im feeble minded, marginally insane and blind as a bat! Does dandruff count as Scrofula? Hmm
I didnt think I was an excessive wanker! Sad

WhichIsBest · 07/02/2013 08:36

Haha at reading with one hand!

TMI now but I am forbidden at the moment. Not in some uncomfortable to read about sub-dom way, but suggested as perhaps wise by my consultant, for baby keeping in purposes after I had a couple of sessions of contractions at 21 and 24 weeks. That's what made me click on the thread!

Mitchy1nge · 07/02/2013 09:18

You continued the practice of masturbation even during pregnancy? Ugh. You disgusting thing.

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Mitchy1nge · 07/02/2013 09:22

sorry, I dropped this: *truly

you truly disgusting thing

and I don't know if dandruff counts as scrofula because that is supposed to be TB

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WhichIsBest · 07/02/2013 09:41

The contractions weren't caused by masturbating. It was taking my dogs for a long walk. I mean, I suppose I could take a quiet moment to myself behind a tree, but it had never crossed my mind to before.
I'm not allowed to do that any more either. Long walks, not tree-wanks, which I wasn't doing anyway.

Mitchy1nge · 07/02/2013 09:52

the very idea of your mum masturbating would make most babies stay put for as long as possible wouldn't it? Although I had a weird dream about my mum once it was not my fault, it wasn't on purpose, I am not in charge of what happens in dreams

how many more weeks do you have left? Congratulations by the way!

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Mitchy1nge · 07/02/2013 09:55

thanks for that link darkesteyes, that is particularly good news about masturbation (and other sorts of sex) after menopause. Have been wondering a bit gloomily about that

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Fallenangle · 07/02/2013 10:18

Very best reason for abstaining WhichIs
Have just realised how impractical 5 a day is. If evenly spaced, one before I get up, one about now, another just before school pick up, one mid evening -not now darling mummy is just having a quick frig- and one at bedtime. DH loves it as a spectator sport but is inclined to join in after a while! Not sure the poor bloke could cope every night.

WhichIsBest · 07/02/2013 10:19

I think I am impressed that you have carried on sex of any sort after having a steamy-mum-dream.
Impressed, or horrified. One of the two.

My ex had a sex dream about his mum once. She was almost 70, wore blouses with lacy collars, you know, like those collectible dolls, and she had a wispy beard. Slight smell of pink wafer biscuits at all times.

And if that doesn't put you off your five a day I don't know what will.

Thanks for the congratulations! I'm 31 weeks now.

Mitchy1nge · 07/02/2013 13:20

ah not long before you can resume your disgusting activities then

I haven't masturbated properly once since starting this thread Hmm turning a vice into a virtue must take all the pleasure out of it

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Mitchy1nge · 07/02/2013 13:21

'mummy is just having a quick frig' Grin

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ComposHat · 07/02/2013 13:28

I'd been feeling unwell, so I went the Doctors and the Doctor told me: 'I'm very sorry Mr Hat but you are going to have to stop masturbating'

Why is that I asked?

'Because it is rude when I'm trying to examine you'

[Cymbal Crash]