To ask you to share your most cringeworthy faux pas?

[superstarheartbreaker]

And make me feel better about mine in the process?

I had a friend over with her daughters on Friday night. We were drinking wine and watching films whilst the girls went to bed. I was a bit tiddled. I started talking about this girl who I envy as she has amazing hair whereas mine is shite. I said rather bitchily "Well her face isn't anything special...a bit like yours and mine but her hair is amazing!" Oh my goodness I wanted the ground to swallow me up! To which my very good natured friend replied "Oh so your saying I'm not pretty now!"
She is actually very pretty.
Things got worse in the morning when I was describing the horrid basin haircuts that my mum used to cut for me; with a fringe. Yes my friend has a fringe! Can you tell I have hair issues?! I sound so shallow but I am not obsessed with appearance any more than the next girl. I did sound like a bitch.
The most annoying thing about the fauz pas of course is that the more you try and explain yourself out of it, the deeper hole you dig! Please share with me yours. I am still cringing now.

I once asked a friend if she'd like all of my monsoon clothes as I'd lost weight and they were too big for me...

At the time my brain thought I was being generous. I was actually saying she was fatter than I was.

Tact and diplomacy have never been my forte.

I remember a doctor coming to see me when I was ill at home (they used to do that you know ) and asking me how my 'stools' were as I was having tummy pain. Not knowing this was a posh word for poo I thought he meant the ones at school that I sat on and went on to describe what they were made of (wood) and how hard and uncomfortable they were. As it happens I had appendicitus so he thought I was just a bit delusional and in my defence I was only 5 but I still remember this as an adult and cringe

Saying to my friends who had invited me round to see their nearly finished new kitchen, "it'll make such a difference when you paint the walls".

They already had (a barfy salmon pink colour which I thought was just the new plaster on the wall)

Blind date, set up by a friend of a friend. Guy was already sat at the table, didn't get up to greet me when I arrived, which didn't give a great first impression.

Asked the usual questions about hobbies, job etc. Every question I asked about what he liked doing was a form of, 'I don't go out much, I just tend to stay in and watch TV'.

So when the bill arrived, I told him that it was nice meeting him, but I was interested in meeting someone with a bit more 'get up and go' about them.

About 5 minutes later, he excused himself to go to the toilet, reached down for crutches, that were concealed on the other side of the table and this was the first point in the evening where I realised he only had one leg.

On the one hand, cringe but on the other, I was annoyed that he'd not somehow highlighted this whilst I was going on about things like, "I'm trying to get back into hiking and camping, would be great to know more people to do this with, interested?"

(Ex) SIL was showing me her wedding photos. Her adult bridesmaid was wearing a hideous huge clunky tent of brown flowered cotton trimmed with orange 'lace' made of string.
'Look what I made her wear.' said SIL
'Haha, you were making sure she didn't outshine you.' I said.
Icy pause - then
'No, I said, look what I made for her to wear.' said SIL.

Still cringing years later