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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to think that this Lady is trying to con me?

35 replies

Madratlady · 02/02/2013 13:15

Quarter to 5 last friday afternoon I backed into the neighbor's hairdresser's car, a people carrier. Completely my fault for not noticing a car the size of a small bus. Hit it straight, back bumper to back bumper. I immediately moved my car forward, got out and checked for damage (none on either car that I could see), and knocked on the neighbor's door. The hairdresser came out, looked at the car with me and agreed she couldn't see any damage. I apologised and drove off.

Monday afternoon I got a note through the door saying she had looked at the car 'in better light' on saturday morning and there was some damage to the bumper, and could I contact her. DH said it seemed weird as it wasn't dark when it happened and there wasn't any noticable damage then, and said to wait and see if she contacted us again.

Friday she knicked on the door and asked why I hadn't phoned. I asked to see the damage on the car. She pointed to a scuff on the side of the bumper (not where I'd have hit the car). I'd have been willing to contribute to work on the car if she was really that bothered about a little scuff. But then she said the rear light was damaged (no visible damage) and that the pannel between the rear door and the back of the car had been buckled outwards but 'the garage managed to bang it back in'. There's no way I'd have missed damage that major at the time that it happened, and the bit that was supposedly damaged didn't have a mark on it anywhere' She then said that she 'just wants the car back to how it was'.

I said I'd talk to my DH and be in touch.

AIBU to think that she saw a young driver (I'm 22 but look younger) ho was flustered after bumping the car, and decided to try and get some money out of me?

I wouldn't be surprised if her next suggestion was that I just give her some money rather than going through the insurance, as she's not mentioned insurance at all. I also thought you were supposed to report damage to your insurer straight away and before repairing it yourself?

She also said that she had a quote for repairs and would get some more quotes, but when I asked how much it was then she backtracked and said that they hadn't actually got back to her yet.

It just seems a little odd to me.

OP posts:

nickelbabe · 02/02/2013 13:16

tell her to go through the insurance.

if she's conning you, she won't make a claim.

retrocutie · 02/02/2013 13:18

Yes, tell her to go through the insurance.

LittleChimneyDroppings · 02/02/2013 13:18

If it happens again, take a photo. Then theres no room for error. But in this case tell her to go through the insurance. Sounds like a con.

Original poster

Madratlady · 02/02/2013 13:23

DH is going to phone her tomorrow and talk to her.

I don't think she would be able to go through the insurance if she's already got it repaired herself?

It just doesn't add up, I imagine it'd cost a lot to have a buckled panel straightened out to perfection, so if it was that badly damaged surely she'd get it fixed through the insurance?

Also, as DH pointed out, I hit the other car at less than 5mph, it just wouldn't have caused the kind of damage that she is claiming there was, especially without marking my (much smaller) car at all.

I would have no problem sorting it out through the insurance if I had actually damaged the car of course!

OP posts:

attheendoftheday · 02/02/2013 13:28

I would go through your insurance.

To be fair, you did hit her, and it is possible for the rear light to be damaged without externally obvious damage.

andubelievedthat · 02/02/2013 13:29

been nearly conned with that old one ! Q?> do the marks on both vehicles match/line up?(i am speaking to my bloke right now re this) how much damage? caused by what speed ? >unlikely

HoHoHoNoYouDont · 02/02/2013 13:29

Ask to see the receipt for the repair she's already had done and check the date.

pigletmania · 02/02/2013 13:30

Next time take pictures, yes Ecco what everybody else has said

HoHoHoNoYouDont · 02/02/2013 13:31

She's def trying to con you. I really despise people like this.

babanouche · 02/02/2013 13:41

Yep, I agree she's taking the piss. You agreed at the time there was no damage. I don't think she's got a leg to stand on. I'm not sure about going through the insurance though because at the end of the day you hit her and they just want an easy life and to make money. I think you'll suffer.

Marmight · 02/02/2013 13:41

But then she said the rear light was damaged (no visible damage) and that the pannel between the rear door and the back of the car had been buckled outwards but 'the garage managed to bang it back in'.

Def trying to con you. That 'panel' is part of the body shell of the car. If that is damaged, there would be a very likely chance that the boot floor would also be damaged, as they are welded together. Also very unlikely that the 'garage' has fixed that as well. Ask to take a look at her (metal) boot floor.

Also bumpers are plastic and crumple far easier than metal.

Tell her to sling her hook.

Good luck with getting this sorted.

Original poster

Madratlady · 02/02/2013 13:50

Andubelievedthat - there was no damage to my Polo, but apparently I had badly damaged her people carrier. I agree with you she will next suggest cash. I honestly think she saw someone much younger than her who was shaken up about bumping her car and decided I would be a push over.

HoHoHo - Good point about the receipt, I didn't think of that.

I realise now I should have taken photos, I was too busy freaking out about bumping into another car, I've only been driving a few months and I'm always very cautious.

I'm glad other people agree that it is probably an attempt to con me. Unfortunately for her I'm not stupid. I'm a little worried she could get nasty though.

OP posts:

manicbmc · 02/02/2013 13:58

She won't have a receipt because there was no damage to the side of her car. Tell her to go through insurance (she won't because she is trying to con you).

If she mentions cash, tell her to fuck off.

WhereYouLeftIt · 02/02/2013 13:59

Definitely sounds like a con to me. There is no way a panel could have been buckled whilst the bumper remains intact. Bumpers take the impact and spread it along their length, for the impact to have reached the body the bumper would have had to take enough force to break it.

shesariver · 02/02/2013 14:00

madrat if she gets nasty then simply phone the Police.

andubelievedthat · 02/02/2013 14:01

probably?please update on this when appropriate, not just cos i am nosy, its the sheer bloody nerve of some people tacking the piss !i am no expert ,but my fella very much is and, a polo reverses into ,at slow speed and seriously damages a people carrier? WTF ! (and now i am off to lie down in a darkened room)best wishes.

GregBishopsBottomBitch · 02/02/2013 14:50

If there was damage to a people carrier, then the polo would have damage too, i got hit on my back bumper at a 5mph, by a people carrier, i had a Fiat Punto, neither car had damage at all, shes definately trying to con you.

Hobbitation · 02/02/2013 14:56

My neighbour reversed into me in the drive (!) with visible damage and he offered to pay for it. I went out and got three quotes for the work and showed him - it itemised what work would be done so he could see I was not having all manner of other work done on the back of it.

I would at least ask for a breakdown of the work carried out. And if she gets funny about it, say "here are my insurance details, we'll take it from there then shall we?"

SpicyPear · 02/02/2013 14:58

Con. Tell her you want it to go through insurance. Don't accept any responsibilty for damage or repairs that she is unable to show evidence of. If there is a next time, take photos.

ivykaty44 · 02/02/2013 15:01

Op you need to contact your own insurance company and tell them what has happened, you should do this after any accident regardless of whether you are claiming.

Then if she tries to claim let your insurance sort it out - that is why you pay a premium for insurance.

If you ever hit another car or vehicle or road user - get your camera out and take snap shots of the area - that way there is not any dispute later, also take photograpsh of the number plate of other vehicles and the surronding area - these can be sent to insurance companies.

I had a man in carpark try to say that when my door blew against his car (which it did, but no damage) that my door had made a dent on his rear offside wheel arch - my door couldn't reach and I took photographs and sent in to my insurance, we never heard a thing.....he was all talk until I got my phone out and took snap shots

nickelbabe · 02/02/2013 15:09

what ivykaty said.

Hobbitation · 02/02/2013 15:12

Op you need to contact your own insurance company and tell them what has happened, you should do this after any accident regardless of whether you are claiming.

It may put your premium up though, esp if under 25. Even if there is no claim.

BCBG · 02/02/2013 15:18

OP, just tell her that you have contacted your insurers and that if she wishes to claim she should do so - give her your policy details. Then contact your insurers and ask that the claims handler makes a note that this may be a fraudulent claim. They will then (if she does contact them) ask for an engineer's report before settling. That will be the end of the matter if the claim is fraudulent as she won't submit one. Exactly the same thing happened to me, except that I wasn't aware of any bump (don't believe there ever was one) and so was only contacted when police contacted me to say it was alleged that I had failed to stop/report an accident. DH spoke to the insurers who advised us exactly as I have stated above. The claimant contacted them once I had passed my details through the police, and they requested an engineer's report. It was never provided because the damage had never been done. If you follow your insurer's advice and tell them you believe it may be fraudulent you will be fine. Whatever happens, NEVER hand money over in lieu of insurance costs - it opens up a whole can of worms regarding liability.

TeenyW123 · 02/02/2013 15:20

Mention tat you hope her insurance covers her for business use. She was at 'work' when the bump happened!

Teeny

andubelievedthat · 02/02/2013 15:32

contact your own ins. co. and your next years policy goes up, even if this goes absolutely into the bin .if u are an honest person as u seem 2 be , and if she cannot come up with any reasonable/legal proof re repairs done so far/damage done by you, tell her to go take a flying fuck to herself you are not in the market of being taken for a financial ride>if u refuse to reply to your own ins. co. letters re this, should any arrive, it goes no further.what next ,? she has "distance" whiplash?

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