to think this reply to an invite is rude?

[Ilisten2theradio]

DC has a party coming up. Due to where it is (not at home) there are very limited numbers.
The mum in question must be aware of this.
Party is for 2.5 hours. The child has told DC "I am coming but only for the last 45 mins"
So AIBU to think the mum should have talked to me and said X really wants to come but we have this prior commitment earlier in the day" and felt around the subject.
IMO this is just plain rude. Surely you accept an invite or you refuse it. You don't say only coming for the last bit.
This mum has done similar to DC before too!
How do I handle it given I will need to pay for this child at the party?

Maybe the child in question really wants to come. It wouldn't bother me TBH.

Stop invitiing them to future parties.

i am sure they will pay in kind for their entrance fee via a gift.

Forget about it, they are rude, limit engagements with them in future.

I think if mom called you and explained then that's fine.

To just not call or message through the child is rude but its AMA Ing his many people are.

Perhaps the Mum is intending to speak to you but the child mentioned it first?

If not, just say something like "Oh your DD mentioned something to mine about 45 minutes?" and then take the conversation from there.

Personally, I'd probably say "Oh that's such a shame but due to limited numbers, it might be best if she leaves it this time".

Sorry amazing!

The last 45 minutes is usually food, cake and party bag. That family has got the party thing down.

Yes, it is rude. They could have said "oh dear, we have a prior engagement so we would only be able to come to the last hour or so..." and given you the opportunity to agree to that.

Thing is, if you then decide to invite someone else it could be argued that it is quite rude to invite someone as second best ....

How much are you paying for each child?

Rude if there's no explanation forthcoming.

Lljkk - lots! does it matter though? its the principle I am annoyed about mainly. I think its not on. As I said had the mum talked to me I probably would not feel so put out. I didn't want DC to invite the child but couldn't talk DC out of it. I am being deliberately vague as don't want to be outed.

£6 would be a lot to some folk and £9 would be a pittance to others. Yes I think it's rude, but I also wonder if you can rely on word of one child to another about the first child's plans, and if you are paying say £200 for the party than an extra £10 more or less doesn't mean much anyway.

TIP In your situation I have NOT paid for the ? child upfront and only paid if they actually turned up. Usually someone else who promised to come & is normally reliable doesn't make it, so at least I don't really end up quids out.

It is rude. Some people really do want to have their cake and eat it, don't they? The bottom line is, the child cannot be in two places at once, and needs to decide which event they would prefer to devote all their time to.

If the child had done the same thing before to your dc maybe they have another family birthday on the same day, and the mum thinks she mentioned it to you last time? (I'm trying to give them the benefit of the doubt).