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AIBU?

to want my boyfriends lizard to die?

80 replies

flaggybannel · 31/01/2013 22:50

sorry, i know i will sound coldharted and i am a pet lover but i really dont like my bf's lizard!
I often go and stay at his flat for a few nights and he has this lizard that drives me crazy.
I dont like its beady eyes. It costs him a fortune for special lights for this mahooosive tank it lives in on around 10hours a day, plus its heatmat thats on pretty constantly too.
It lives on a diet of boiled eggs that it likes to leave to rot a bit first in the tank for a couple of days and poor bald baby mice that have to be kept in the freezer and defrosted. Boak. It also likes to leave these to rot before eating. It does eat fruit- when it feels like it.
The tank is so big the only place for it is in the bedroom, special light flicks on timer around 8am, tank and contents start to stink around 8.05am and continues throught the day.
Mostly the lizard spends its time sulking in its cave and watchin us with said beady eyes. My bf spends a lot of time worried about its lack of eating, shedding, pooing, exercise etc etc but its in robust health and is expected to live about 20years.
Its around 3-4ft now and expected to get bigger.
The twice it has had run of the flat while i have been there it has either ignored me or snapped at me.
Its not really a pet in my opinion as its actually dangerous to feed and should be done with some sort of steel tongs!
They are grumpy beasts and are known to dislike being handled.
Am i being u to want it to just feck off? Or to go live on a nice reptile farm somewhere?
Before anyone gets all judgey, i am well aware i have no right to ask/tell/beg my bf to get rid and wouldn dream of it either! Guess i just wanted to rant.

OP posts:

Report

TheSmallClanger · 31/01/2013 23:38

I like the texture of live reptile skin. It feels like touching an old tapestry.

Tanned reptile leather is nowhere near as nice. (Is also illegal to import nowadays).

LadyBeagleEyes · 31/01/2013 23:39

I knew someone once that kept and bred pythons and boa constricters.
They lived in a huge shed, with little drawers of eggs with little snakes coming out.
It was all heated, he was a professional, but despite all the glass cases it stank.
I couldn't wait to get out, it was claustrophobic and full of large snakes FFS.
And I wasn't even scared of them till then.

TheSmallClanger · 31/01/2013 23:41

Snakes really do hum. It's one of those smells you don't forget.

Bottleoffish · 31/01/2013 23:50

Snakes do not smell if they are kept properly and clean. I have 26 of them upstairs and there is not a whiff from them.

However, fi they regurge a meal, that does stink...

flaggybannel · 31/01/2013 23:54

26 snakes!
Will swap 5 small ones for a tegu?

OP posts:

pictish · 31/01/2013 23:56

Yuck. He'd have to have some pretty astonishing qualities for me to coorie in with one of them. What an odd choice of pet.

Bottleoffish · 01/02/2013 00:02

I haven't got any particularly small ones... plus I don't want a Tegu with beady eyes...

Sallyingforth · 01/02/2013 00:08

I think it is lovely actually. But I think it's cruel to keep it in that tank when it's fully grown.

waltermittymissus · 01/02/2013 00:20

Urgh!!! YAsoNBU!!!

ripsishere · 01/02/2013 00:42

Not my cup of tea at all, but each to their own. I do remember a craze/fashion for keeping lizards about 14 years ago. A friend of ours got a small something and was fine with the feeding and handling. Small lizard is now about 1.5 metres long and eats many more pinkies (if that's the proper name). It has gone through several vivariums and stopped her going on holiday.

ripsishere · 01/02/2013 00:42

Possible exageration, I'll reduce the length to one metre.

catladycourtney1 · 01/02/2013 00:51

I think reptiles are quite cool but I'd feel a bit weird with it wandering around the flat. Although I suppose you get used to it. Just pretend it's a cat? I mean, they're a bit similar, with the dead mice and that...

I just can't quite get my hat on with snakes, though. As much as I try to rationalise it, they freak me out. I have friends who keep snakes, and I can hold them and pet them and feed them, but I wouldn't want one as a pet. And anyone who keeps bloody spiders clearly has a screw loose somewhere.

BrittaPerry · 01/02/2013 00:51

When I was first pregnant with my first baby, DH was living with a man who had a huge lizard. The smell of that when I had morning sickness...

Illgetmegoat · 01/02/2013 01:25

I miss my old boy, he was a rescue and was a mean git when he arrived (quite possibly because he was kept in such a state) but once I sorted him out he was great fun - we used to curl up and watch tv together, I'd have a couple of digestives and he'd have a couple of... well whatever he fancied and it was all very lovely and civilised, he was a gentleman at heart and had vair posh tastes.
He used to try and encourage me out of the bath so he could get in and if that didn't work run off with my towel. I have fond memories of him sprawling over the back of the sofa and then feeling him pop his chin down on the top of my head after quietly scooching over - we had many a quiet, friendly time together. Soft as butter but twice as nice. Sir Dave le Eggetheef. I still have his paddling pool and walking harness actually, he liked to climb the shed . Big can be beautiful too, or maybe he's not a big lizard but a small dinosaur? possibly not helpful.

See I'm far too biased to say anything other than YABU! I agree with Bottleoffish my herps/tanks don't smell, maybe bf hasn't quite got on top of his appetite? Visitors don't know we have them until they see them - our dogs are much stinkier
Also, I can't remember the last time I heard of a rep keeper that only had one of anything, he is planning a breeding pair I asume? Hahahaha...ahh good luck! That way madness lies (according to DH, not me, I can't hear the voices in my hot room).

Seriously though, I hope you and the Tegu can come to some kind of amicable living arrangement. A non-patronising nod to you for disliking him but letting him be - even though you want to turn him into a handbag I think you sound lovely for not making life difficult for Bf or beast at the expense of your creep-o-meter. Reptiles are a joy in their own right but not for everyone and I am doubly cursed to be spurned as very few people want to share in my adoration of my big spiders either ; someone called my lovely Delilah a walking nightmare, but she's beautiful and gentle and sweet and floofy . I hope bf appreciates you.

Illgetmegoat · 01/02/2013 01:43

And anyone who keeps bloody spiders clearly has a screw loose somewhere.

Hah! Completely missed this before I posted - if it was only one screw Catlady I think DH would be less worried about letting me out of his sight with cash in hand and a wistful expression!

I'm more than happy to introduce you to Delilah or Margot if you would like to meet some lovely ladies that enjoy late nights, walks in the woods and snuggling on cold evenings - come to Spider singles.co.uk to meet the woman that may change how you feel about arachnids.

catladycourtney1 · 01/02/2013 01:48

Illgetmegoat Thanks, but no thanks I'm sure they're very nice once you get to know them and everything, but they put the willies up me something terrible.

bootsycollins · 01/02/2013 01:54

I would run like fuck, my god terrifying! There's no way I could be in the room if he was roaming free no fucking way. I'm also phobic about eggs and have a fine tuned sense of smell so just can't cope with anything that hums. Hats off to you, your a braver woman than me

Getmegoat I loved your story about cheeky old boy, what a sweetie. I just can't handle the reality of lizards they freak me out big time.

flaggybannel · 01/02/2013 08:10

Sir Dave le Eggetheef! [big grin] brilliant!
Its actually friendly to my bf, he has raised this thing from an egg, i think it knows am not keen and probably wonders who i think i am invading its living quarters where it has a cushy number with its 'dad'.
Just to clarify, the tank is cleaned daily of poo and general detrius, my bf is fastidious about sterilizing etc, i think its the eggs mainly making it whiff and this mulch sort of stuff thats spread on the bottom of the tank, tis not a smell you would normally expect indoors.
To the poster who mentioned they thought it was cruel to be in that tank once fully grown, let me assure you ,the tank it is in currently leaves only space in the room for a double bed. Nothing else. My bfs rooms and living space in his flat are bigger than in my house.
Plus the tank has two storeys. And a cave. And a basking area, and a waterfall, and a little pool. And half a tree log for , well, for whatever. I wouldnt tolerate anyone being cruel to an animal bf or not.
I will admit i do have ishoos with this lizard, i am freaked out most the time i am there and know my blood pressure is sky high. There have been a couple of things that make me nervous, like the snapping, and the time some mice had been left to defrost in a tub with a lid on. And i went to make toast, couldn find butter... Not what you want to find. Or the time i saw it kind of lash at my bf for not being quick enough with the egg dinner , and those eyes. Did i mention the beady eyes? It watches us. A lot.

OP posts:

Buzzardbird · 01/02/2013 10:54

Wow, that tank sounds great! I think you should move in there and let the reptile have the run of the house!

sparkle12mar08 · 01/02/2013 11:27

Well I sure as hell wouldn't be getting jiggy in the bedroom with that damn thing in a tank next to the bed! No way Jose!

Crinkle77 · 01/02/2013 11:49

Doesn't sound like the nicest of pets but it is his house and his electricity bill so he can do what he likes. Can he not keep the lizard in its cage when you are there or let it out but shut the living room door so it can't come in and frighten you?

Ormiriathomimus · 01/02/2013 11:51

I would quite like a lizard. I always fancied a bearded dragon. I don't think they are always unfriendly - I know one that likes being held and stroked.

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Ormiriathomimus · 01/02/2013 11:54

OK a tegu seems to be quite a big bigger potentially. Still nice though. Sorry

CajaDeLaMemoria · 01/02/2013 11:58

I would do just about anything for a tegu. OH isn't keen though, and the house is already fill of 10foot tanks, so I've resisted so far.

Like you said, it's likely to have years left to live, and if BF is going to get a female than breeding etc will probably take placeat some point. It's probably a good idea to try and like it - or talk to your BF about not getting another one?

Getting comfortable about them free roaming might end up being quite important, especially when there is two.

I'm so jealous that you get to live with one! I wish I could convince OH to let me.

CaptChaos · 01/02/2013 12:03

I think reptiles are marmite pets. I love them, lizards have such cute little faces and bliss out when you tickle them, snakes too.

Tegus aren't ones I've met before, but I have looked after blue-tongue and frill necked lizards and taken care of a sick goanna before now. I never noticed them smelling, however, I live with a beagle now and he apparently niffs a bit so.....

You don't like them so YANBU, but I have a feeling you're going to have to learn to at least appreciate him.

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