To ask dd to contribute....

[impty]

Dd2 has lost her PE kit. Secondary school so will cost £60 to replace. She also gets £15 pocket money a month. Should I ask her to contribute for a replacement kit?
She is upset about losing it but she does lose stuff a lot!
Am torn... wwyd?

If she loses stuff a lot and you think she needs to learn the value of things you could get her to pay half over 3 months, so £5 a month...

There is so much lugging around of stuff, and swapping of bags in secondary school, it's not hard to lose track. A bit harsh to make her pay - maybe suggest if it happens again you'll expect her to help replace it.

Surely if you put a bit of pressure on the school got DD to search around and retrace her steps it might just turn up?

Ds's Games kit is a fortune too - he knows he has to replace whet he loses, funnily enough he keeps good track of it

Has she looked in lost property? I'd wait a week before buying new, they usually turn up if labelled.

Lost on Friday, so she's hunting for it this week. Fingers crossed it turns up. I've rung school and its not in lost property.
I'm sympathetic to her losing it....its annoying to lose stuff. But want to get her to be more careful too!
So I'm in two minds. I am tempted to withhold this months pocket money, but feel that might be a bit mean. She did lose it accidently after all.

I like Banana's idea.
She should pay half - some contribution each month - you decide.
Really hope it turns up though.

Bit harsh. It happens. Personally, if she's not retrieved it by about Wednesday, I'd go into school myself. IME (and ds, in particular used to lose LOADS of stuff) secondary schools have MASSES of lost property, but usually no time to sort it out. Ask if you can rummage yourself, and then, if still not found, ask if there is any you can have, in exchange for a small donation for school funds. ds's school had a whole wall full of wardrobe sized cupboards, from dcs who had left years ago, or kit that was not named, and they'd had over a year. They were always very happy to let parents take stuff (for free) - although I used to like to give them a fiver or something for school fund or PTA funds or the like.

How on earth does it cost £60 in the first place though ?

Art, music, science are the usual offenders. Rooms with side benches, lots of moving round and lots of stored junk.

DDs managed to hide in the dark est corner of music for almost two weeks. she was surviving on very limited spares.

I am also refusing to replace games kit due to a whole set vanishing on the bus and DD not telling me in time to ring the bus company.

I made my ds pay £12 for his PE shorts that he lost. He has plenty of money because he is tight as anything, and likes to save all the birthday and Christmas money he's ever been given, and it's not like he goes without anything so I refuse to feel guilty.

He hasn't lost anything in the year and a half since I made him pay for these shorts, so it did the trick and it doesn't seem to have left him with any emotional scars.

Shorts, polo with school logo, trackie top with school logo, football socks school logo, football boots, shin pads... £60+
I have tried to go in before about a coat. Receptionist insisted no coats there. Teacher over heard and said yes there is, pulled out dd's coat!!
So unless I leap over the reception desk I may not be able to rummidge.
Still hoping it appears though...i suspect if it does it'll be a week after i buy a new one

She came home with it today! She was warned that if it hadn't turned up she would have had to pay for some of it.
I will do this if there's a next time.
Plus i hadn't mentioned it to Dh yet, so she owes me! Dh would have needed to lecture her for hours...
Smiles all round

Yeah impty - really glad she's found it and hopefully learnt a lesson.
You were good not telling your DH. I would have been fuming too much to keep quiet!
Bless her - all's well that ends well.

very glad it turned up. Full sets are ridiculously expensive.

Our skorts are lovely, but they are £18 and no cheap alternative and the new hoodies are pay extra for names.

It adds up very quickly and is ultra annoying if it hasn't been pinched, but is just sat under a bench somewhere and no ones been arsed to take it to lost property or read the name tapes and drop a note to the right tutor group.

They have an electronic message system so it can't be that time consuming.

replace it with second hand stuff? Make her pay 1/3

Absolutely make her contribute. I made my 8 year old contribute £5 towards a new PE kit after she lost hers. She had a week to find it and then she had to donate £5 from her Christmas money towards trainers.

Oh she found it, that's good.

It is annoying when they lose things. But it isn't always their fault if somebody else picks something up by mistake. My DD lost brand new track suit bottoms first week of secondary. They had been quite expensive. Teacher said take a pair out of the Lost property. And I said they might be somebody's but we did anyway. I think the original ones turned up in the end. But as for paying out. No. I don't think I would ask them to. As a child who was always in trouble for losing things.