in hoping I'll be able to start wohm again when newborn is 4mo?

[sweetieaddict]

I'm nearly due to give birth and am hoping when the new baby is about 4mo to start working from home again in the evenings.

I currently am a SAHM to my 2 year old but work from home in the evenings when he is in bed and probably one day at the weekend when dh takes over.

Am I being totally unrealistic to take 4 months mat leave and hope that I'll be able to start working from home again at night?

I obviously have no idea how it's going to work with two dc and a brand new routine, so maybe am looking at this with rose tinted glasses?

Potential issues are:

Newborn not sleeping through from 4 months as ds did
I struggled with breastfeeding with ds and gave up at 8 weeks, but am really keen to establish and stick to it with the new baby. However, if I am feeding on demand how am I going to be able to work in the evenings?
Exhaustion from sleepless nights and new addition.

I've worked really hard to gain new clients over the last year and am worried that too much time off could result in them looking elsewhere. How does everyone else manage? I don't earn enough yet to pay for day childcare, hence working in the evenings.

I started WFH when DD was about 4mo. My fabulous DM comes and spends time with DD while I do as part of what I do involves phone calls/Skype but if she can't come DD sits by me and plays while I work. You never know how your baby is going to be but I feel as if I have the best of both worlds by not having to leave DD but keeping my business going and earning at the same time. Yes, there are tough times when her sleep is a bit rubbish but the way I see it this is my life now and I feel it is working really well. If I were you I wouldn't want to lose those clients!

Also just to add that 4 months was about the time my DD started going to bed at 7pm so even if your baby doesn't sleep through you might get that period in the evening when he she is having the longest stretch of sleep to do your work.

Will your DP be there in the evening? If so I think it'll be fine. He can take care of baby while you work in another room. You might need to break off for to feed the baby (or have got baby to take expressed milk) but by 4 months most babies are less fractious and will sleep at least for part of the evening I'd say.

My DC didn't sleep through until 3. She also didn't sleep from 7pm until she was well over a year. I did WOHM from 9 months though. If your DH is helpful it will be fine. If not you may struggle but I may be easy. All babies are different...

Until fairly recently a lot of women only had 3 months maternity leave, and coped fine. I'm sure it will be ok, but it may require persistence and support.

Thanks for the responses.

Yes, dh will be here so that's a good idea.

I suppose I am most worried about extreme tiredness, I was on my knees with breastfeeding during the night and when swapped to bottle with ds noticed a huge difference - he slept for longer as did I!

I know I will be very tired looking after both of them in the day and then working at night, then feeding throughout the night but I don't really have a choice if I want to keep my hand in.

However, I'm sure there are many mums who manage far more.....

I understand your worries but it sounds realistic to me. I started WFM in the evenings when DD was 3 months (not every evening). It was fine as she slept 7-11 (and only woke another once in the night) and I needed some brain stimulation by that point! By 4 months I guess you won't be breastfeeding on demand and certainly not during the evening. Good luck!

It sounds manageable but tiring to me. Is your 2 year old old enough for pre-school? That might be an idea for a two or three mornings a week so you get a the relative peace of only having a baby rather than having a toddler running around too.

Yes, he'll be starting at 2.5 but it's afternoon sessions and a little walk away.

The sessions are for 3 hours so if I drive I could squeeze in a couple of hours (if newborn sleeps!) before picking him up again.

If I walk though (really hoping to for fresh air and weight loss) it won't really be possible as I'll have a coffee in a cafe or walk around the shops with dc2 and then walk back to pick him up.

It seems like the evenings are the only viable option when I can get going in peace (ahem). I could give both dc to ds one day at the weekend though?!

Well at least pre-school will give you a little bit of a break, but the hours are quite short, especially if it's not v local. Working one day at the weekend plus some evening might work. How many hours are you hoping to work?

mixed feeds? breastfeed during the day, bottle while dh is there... mixed feeds saved my sanity.

Evenings are the best option and weekend days. Do you need to put in lots of hours, or just a few a week? If DH supports you, you will be fine.

It's great you have your own business and the hard work will be worth it.

I've just noticed that I wrote: "I could give both dc to ds one day at the weekend though?!"

That should read to dh not ds - he might find it pretty hard to manage that!

See, the tiredness is seeping in already....!

On my list of 'things to do' is research the combined feedings as I did think if I can get a bottle in early with expressed milk it's going to free me up a lot.

At the moment, I work every evening 7 - 11 and one weekend day and it's knackering but vital. I'll probably just throw myself back to similar hours and see if I crash and burn.

DH is amazing, my rock (vomit) and without him I really wouldn't be able to manage. Although he is getting rather sick of ready meals now, so I'll have to do some batch cooking for the poor man....

To be honest except for night time wakings (which is obviously a big except!) it probably won't be any worse for you than it is now. There will be extra work for your DH settling the baby but that's OK; you do that while he works so fair's fair. I think finishing at 11pm is not too bad since you don't have to be up early for school or pre-school (obviously the kids may different ideas but that's what CBeebies is for). If you manage it now I think you'll still be OK.

When is your baby due OP?

Oh for goodness sake. I went back to work when both of mine were 4 months or less. So did/do many other people. What exactly do you think will happen? Extreme exhaustion? Welcome to parenthood.
I'm continually aghast at the extreme wimpishness expressed on these threads. Is it a generational thing? I sincerely hope my daughters have a bit more about them when it comes to their turn.

WhatDoIKnow - We're you working evenings and looking after two under 3 during the day? OP's position is rather different from working and using childcare and getting the evening (relatively) to yourself. I'm sure she'll cope as she has so far but she's entitled to discuss how she can best make this work for her and her family.

Just a point about bf... Sounds like you switched to ff around the time of a growth spurt which when bf is very tiring - once you get to around three months it gets better. Worth bearing in mind.

Don't know how that rogue apostrophe got into my last post...