To want dc2 to be summerborn for financial reasons?

[hellohellohihi]

Obviously I know you can't plan these things too too much, but if our next baby is born in July or August 2014:

• my bonus will be included in my mat pay calcs

• dd will be almost 3 and will get funded childcare places so her nursery costs will be lower, minimizing the cost whilst I'm in mat pay.

• by the time dc2 goes to nursery dd will still have a years worth of funding

• dc2 will require a year less childcare due to being one of the youngest in the year

Am I being naive/foolish for crossing my fingers for this?? Obviously this is based on numerous assumptions but I just wondered if I'm the only one who tries to "engineer" their pregnancies to maximise their financial situation?!?!

Oooh one other thing I've thought of is that my mum got pregnant very easily as well. I spent all of my teenage years and early twenties having it drilled into me that "fertility is hereditary - some people can afford to take chances and will get away with it - you won't".

The mental adjustment from "pregnancy happens if you are not vigilant every single second" to "sometimes it is hard to get pregnant even if you really want to" is enormous and I don't think I ever really made it.

Oh I know was incredibly lucky with my pregnancies, I have had two miscarriages as well but have always got pregnant the first month oif trying or in ds1's case after no it taking precautions once. It means I am extra careful now and I thank my lucky stats how blessed I am.

And its not relevant but as I was so lucky I chose to donate eggs in the hope of passing on that luck and giving someone else the gift if a child. My egg recipient is pregnant with twins :) having gone through the donation process I can only imagine how difficult ivf etc is.

Some people are lucky and that's all it is, luck but if you are fortunate enough to conceive easily it doesn't hurt to try and plan a pregnancy, I think all of us are happy whatever but if a certain month makes sense for whatever reason it can't hurt to try for it.

I felt exactly the same as the op - my first dc is a summer baby and I wanted another summer baby so that there would only be 3 rather than 4 school years between them, because I expect my children will be fairly bright and ready for school at 4 and to save a year's childcare costs. However things don't always work out like that and I am (touch wood) expecting a September baby who would have to be over two weeks early to be in the year above. This thread has actually showed me that this is probably a good thing!

Mummyto we found that's not necessarily true! Its about your combined fertility - my parents conceived my sister within one month of TTC, two months with me. DH's parents conceived two of three of them by 'surprise' and one easily. It took us over 2 1/2 years because we had male factor fertility problems due to him having a previously undiagnosed health problem. We didn't expect it to happen immediately but never imagined it would take as long as it did.

Having hung around the Conception boards for two years now, I have been amazed at how many people post about quick/unexpected conception with DC1, only to struggle with DC2. Various factors contribute to fertility and while I appreciate it sounds wonderfully ideal to 'plan' pregnancies, not everyone has that luxury,

Black holes - I think you're probably right.

Frankelly

Katie- I didn't think you we're boasting

It was more phrases such as 'Got it bang on.' Thus implying that to conceive exactly when planned deserves a round of applause. This is probably me taking things to heart because of my own experience but I didn't plan to be so efficient and go through menopause before the age of 30 and it's made me feel as if I've somehow failed. I know this isn't true but it's how I sometimes feel.

On a different note, research has shown that summer born babies are happier than people born in the winter months.
www.huffingtonpost.ca/mobileweb/2012/10/23/summer-babies-ceos_n_2006347.html last paragraph. Something to do with circadian rhythms. That said, having taught for years and still working in education, summer born children don't tend to do as well academically as older children but I do think that other factors can contribute. I think that, provided the right support & right opportunities are given to children, all will achieve their potential.

5Madthings- I remember you saying you we're donating a while ago. I think you're marvellous!

*were, obv!

I was youngest in year at school. Never a problem.

I have two dec dcs and if I have third really want spring or summer one so older ones can just run about in garden/park for entertainment. Much harder entertaining toddler in winter as still need to get out to burn off energy.

I'm a Feb baby, best time to be born in my opinion

Used to have half term off from school, never had exams and when I was 18 the majority of my friends could come out to celebrate etc.

A summer birthday would be nice though.

what sage said.

my baby is due in august and I def would not have planned it that way as I'm convinced august babies are disadvantaged. However after bloody ages ttc I'll be thrilled with him/her (touchwood) regardless.

Sage I'm not smug nor want a round of applause. I was very surprised to conceive in my first month. Astounded. I waited to start trying until it would be in my preferred window. I was lucky. I shared my experience with someone trying the same. I also deliberately included the choice of a friend who wanted a different outcome so as not to upset people who made the same choice as her. I don't know how it would be possible to answer the OP with experience of planning without it being very clear that conception happened quickly.

Oh what the heck, just to add that my baby had a dire 20 week scan. Had we taken some of the medical advice we were given, and things had turned out differently, I would have then ttc whenever we could think about trying again. I'm not obsessed with the timing, it was a starting point that worked out well for me. But he's fine, thankfully.

I didn't realise August babies were so damaged and never amounted to anything!!
FFS.

Have to say my oldest is 4 and just missed school ( sept) can read & write, add, subtract and really should be at school. Imagine his advantage over a summer born.

He will be a full year ahead.

The cost savings are short lived.

Fwiw, he wasn't planned.

It may seem that summer borns are 'behnd' but that might only be in comparison to the other children n their class. Most decent teachers make sure they're on track for their age, not in comparison to the others. Don't sweat the school thing.

Oh gawd, I wish I hadn't read this thread. It's something that's been bothering me for a few weeks now.
I'm 9 weeks, expecting DC3 on 2nd September, but as DS1 and DS2 were both 3 weeks early, I'm expecting an August baby.
I'm totally thrilled to be expecting and completely planned, but I hadn't fully realised the disadvantage of being an August baby or how long lasting the statistics are. I feel so guilty now and I am worrying myself over this so much. I know it's pregnancy hormones as much as anything, but it's something I can't get out of my mind.

I'm a summer born and the worst thing about it was starting infants in Easter after everyone else had already made their friends and been there ages. I still cite that as the reason I've felt 'out on the peripheral' for my entire life! I don't know if they still stagger it like that. It evened out educationally and if anything I was better off because my mum was teaching me to read and write at home. My birthday is perfectly placed but my parents weren't the type to have us do outdoorsy stuff...

My baby is due at the end of June and I think I've (accidentally) timed it brilliantly. I'll have my mat leave over the summer and can be outside lots walking off that baby weight (DC1 was born end of Autumn and it was horrendous weather). Less childcare costs as you say. Great for birthdays. Super duper roll on June!

I think in the days when you went to school and when you left that was it, you had what you had then it was tougher on summer born children.

These days, maybe they don't do quite as well at school as autumn born children but they have the advantage of selecting a post-school pathway and if it doesn't suit them then they can change routes because they almost a whole year 'in hand'. If they are well supported then they have a better chance of not having to spend their lives doing something that doesn't suit them.

It really isn't a clear cut thing any more then the number of children one has or the age at which one has them, different things suit different families and a lot of it is down to chance so just do what works best for you.

My sister is August 29th. Ten GCSEs, 3 A Levels, BSc, Masters....only anecdotal I know.

These threads mystify me. Surely you just want a baby? . But then again, I can't imagine just planning a baby, conceiving the baby and having the baby.Just seeing two lines on the stick seems completely unachievable and complex.

sheeplikessleep - bless you... if it's any consolation I'm a July baby and together with a lot of my July and August peers stayed on for A-levels and went to uni. I was a high achiever even at primary (one of those annoying ones who was always getting certificates and raced through the maths books). I do think it's down to the stuff my mum did at home with me though, rather than anything to do with school. I'm not boasting because I'm definitely not a high achiever now!

Lots of March and earliers didn't even stay on for GCSEs. I really don't think it matters when you were born by the time it starts to matter, iykwim.

yanbu, Darn sight better reasons than many.

OP - in the scheme of things birthdate is nothing. How your child grows up is more to do with who they are and the support you and your partner give them. Statistically September / October borns might do better on average than July / August birthdays but for your individual children that is not that big a deal I'd say.

Some people don't like having August birthdays. I'm early January and never liked it. It's not really ruined my life though :)

I have two spring babies for what its worth (not planned in terms of timing as we'd been trying for a good while with DD and hadn't actually started trying at all with DS ) and it's a lovely time to have a young baby going out everyday for walks and sitting with baby in the garden. So there's more to consider than being old in the school year and if you want to try for a summer baby as it would make things easier financially easier there nothing wrong with that (remembering that nothing in life is guaranteed!)

Iworship - I really hope that I can help to counterbalance it too. At least I have the situation where DS2 starts school next September, so I have 3 years of just me and DC3 at home (in school time) before he/she starts school. DH keeps telling me that it is what it is and he/she will be absolutely fine.

DS1 is in reception and born in October, is on of the oldest in his year. He's settled in so well, was totally ready for it.

I hope also being the youngest of 3, our new baby will be confident and bolshy enough at a young four when he / she starts, with all of the older kids who will be head and shoulders above!

Hortaiia why was your brother disadvanted?