Airing dirty laundry on fb can be a good thing?

[ShephardsDelight]

I have seen over the years and one fairly recently,
messages of peoples public walls often sent by a gf/wife of someone who has been cheating to the other woman or their partner (just ime I've never seen a man do it). Basically along the lines of 'Thanks for ruining my marriage!' or something.
My first thought is in airing something like that in such a public place! and also if the wife/gf making herself look like she a soap star wannabe or something.
But I also found myself thinking, good on them!!!!
Often the worst thing about cheating is the humiliation, "who knew before me' etc.So maybe a good dose of humiliation to the cheaters is a good thing??. I was told my opinion is wrong and thats its never a good idea under any circumstance, am BU?

I have a (now ex) "friend" who did something really nasty recently, she then set about bullying my via fb.
I didn't rise to it, I'm an adult 40 not a teenage child having a strop.

She's shown her true colours in more ways than one, as a result she has lost my friendship of 18 years.

Apparently I'm frumpy and me and my DH are "shit people"
These are the shit people who took her in for several months when she fell out with her parents etc etc.

I now understand why 7 of her friends are no longer talking to her....

Sadly though, seeing this childish crap on fb has made me utterly determined to never speak to her again. She's going to be very lonely one day

I find that the people that do this on FB are generally the type of people you can well imagine seeing, screeching and toothless, on Jeremy Kyle.

No it's never a good idea imo. There is someone I was acquainted with, who aired ALL her dirty laundry on FB, but later on down the line, certain aspects of her tale of woe did not add up, if this was pointed out to her, she'd have a rant and block whoever the offending 'hater' was.

I've blocked the loon now, as I don't take kindly to people who have a smear test and have some abnormal cells lasered off, and then proceed to detail the horrors of her 'cancer', and how she almost died to FB. Haven't had anything to do with her in a long time, but have heard on the grapevine she's been out recently to 'celebrate being in remission for over a year'.

Makes me angry just thinking about it.

The one time I kind of did, I did it in an obscure way.

I finally found out my so called best friends had been slagging me off to anyone who would listen, even calling SS to report me for 'abusing' my DC.

I put my status update 'Right, that's it, I have had it with two faced people, I am only going to bother with REAL friends from now on'. No names or circumstances mentioned, yet the female of the couple defriended and blocked me and the male of the couple rang me the next day to tell me my status had upset her. She must have recognised herself then!

Yabu.

Witnessed this on twitter. My ex bf from years ago was with a woman for 3 years, seemed that he'd FINALLY settled down which was good after years of being a serial monogamist and breaking girls hearts (mine no exception).

Just before Christmas he decided to cheat on her with his best friend. Leaving his gf of 3 yrs, who knowing him he'd probably promised the world to, heartbroken. But interestingly he got away scot free. What happened was she started bitching at this woman on twitter and the woman did the same back. So they were ripping one another apart and neither said anything about him aside from both going on about how much they loved him and his now ex posting endless heartbreak quotes..

It WAS interesting to watch as an observer. I feel very sorry for anyone who is cheated on and also feel sorry for the ow/m sometimes too because if they didn't know their beau was actually with anyone that must be devastating. However the person who has cheated is by far the worst person involved and always seems to get off lightly, especially when its a man who has cheated ime.

Sorry, I did go off on a tangent a bit there. But as interesting as it is to watch I don't feel its ever good to air dirty laundry online. Just because it is private and should be dealt with privately. Its very undignified to start slating the ow/m or your ex with all your friends/family and theirs watching. But it would be nice if the woman who has been cheated on would stop having a cat fight with the ow and go at the guy for a change .. Not online for nosey bastards like me to see of course

A younger family member is superb for airing dirty laundry on Facebook - oh the life of a teenager! On the other hand I got a lifetime supply of brownie points from her mum for being her friend and posting vaguely sensible comments :)

Exactly Hegsy, we're 15 months in ttc DC2. Not getting anywhere so we'll be going through the exact same thing. No doubt I'll tell a few people, I have nothing to be ashamed of imo, but will I posting blow by blow accounts, no chance!

YABU it is horrible and undignified and FWIW partners and husbands ruin relationships too, I have a facebook friend who i hide because she was WAYYY oversharing , it is like going out in the street and shouting in the street and scrapping

No, I think it is horrible and attention seeking. My Dd and other children in her class were accused of bullying a classmate on fbook (ok no names were directly mentioned but some initials were plus initials of teachers). The school and teachers and all other children confirmed that this was NOT the case and that the child who had accused Dd and others was in fact the child at fault who had admitted lying to get attention from her parents. The worst thing of all was seeing some other parents dive in there and make nasty comments. It was one of the most horrible things we have ever experienced.

Even before that I thought that kind of comment on fbook was totally inappropriate. I completely lose respect for people when they do it. Like you Hegsy I have been having serious health issues but wouldn't dream of putting it on fbook in a self pitying way. I cannot bear it.

There is one exception, my friend's Dd is very ill and she updates people on fbook because it is much easier than phoning round everyone. That is different imo.

'cherrie' I have seen parents jump on kids all over facebook it really is uncalled for I have also seen parents mentioning names on facebook these are adults acting like or worse than teenagers

Agreed mrsJay thankfully the school found out and threatened the parents with legal action if she continued to do it. Not sure how that would have panned out but it did put a stop to it. I put it to this parent that it was ironic that she as an adult was basically bullying 9 year olds via fbook while wrongly accusing them of bullying her own 9 year old. Absolutely horrible.

do agree that its HIGHLY entertaining though....

some people i have on fb i only keep on there to laugh at their jezza style dramas

I read a full spate of comments from one old school friend whose partner had cheated on her...for the third time. She was going on about being betrayed and how she was better off and every day is a better one and so on. This went on for about a month or so before she took him back and it went straight back to lovey-dovey comments about how much she loved him and how they were going to get married (!!)

It was embarrassing. She looked like a complete doormat.

I did recently witness an amazingly detailed break up on twitter. Quite an amicable break up at first then more and more juicy and unpleasant details and increasing hysteria. all very entertaining but GOD the lack of dignity.
the really freaky thing though was reading these comments addressed to the ex WHO ISN'T EVEN ON TWITTER.
that's just WEIRD right?

Oh yes, once I unfriended my bullying (ex) friend she came out with even more vile stuff.... She really ought to check out her privacy settings.. She was so nasty, used my initials in her posts and not a single person replied.

Technically I don't know they were posted, but I do.. Lost me a lot of sleep due to my anger. But I have remained unusually quiet: I value my dignity

I had somebody fall out with her mum spectacularly it was awful but it was those cryptic messages and mud slinging, really personal stuff, I hid her for a while