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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To let dd 8 read all the Jacqueline Wilson books?

48 replies

PolkadotCircus · 23/01/2013 14:15

So dd has just turned 8 and loves JW.She's a prolific reader and loved the JW aimed at younger readers. Not into censoring books so because she wanted to I said she could read the rest.She's just read Cookie and dp was a bit shocked,thinks we shouldn't let her read the others.

Ok it's a book re dv and the dad calls the little girl ugly,chops her rabbit's head off and hits the mum but for some reason dd loved it and that is real life for some children.

She's quite sensible and we chatted over the issues ie I said the daddy was a bit poorly. However she has been asking about it -a lot.

So should I let her read the rest or not? Oh and if anybody could give me a heads up re content of the most gritty I'd be very grateful.

OP posts:

Neighbourhoodwatchbitch · 23/01/2013 14:21

I'd let her read the books if she enjoys them. I read them all at that age and absolutely loved them! I haven't turned out bad or rude for reading them! I've still got them in my loft!

floatyjosmum · 23/01/2013 14:29

Tbh I have a few issues with them, dd who is 8 next week knows not to ask me so asks exp instead!

I have issues with the 'dumping ground' for kids in care and also the more recent one where the mum went on holiday with the new boyf and left them home alone so they hid in the woods from the social worker!

From what you've put I've another reason not to like them!

cory · 23/01/2013 14:29

I think you have handled it very well, letting her discuss the difficult issues in a positive way. And that particular book is a very positive one in many ways: it shows the mother and her daughter breaking away from a destructive relationship and going on to form a new life for themselves through their own work (with the hint of a healthier new relationship on the horizon). Definitely a good model.

Some of JW's books are a little more disturbing- you might want to have a quick read through yourself first. Vicky Angel is about death and a controlling friendship that goes beyond death- 8 might be a little young for that. Love Lessons is about a teacher having a relationship with an underage pupil; again, you might want to think about that. Kiss, though a beautifully written book imo, may also be a bit mature: it is about teenage love and more specifically homosexuality and contains an episode of self-harming.

Original poster

PolkadotCircus · 23/01/2013 14:31

You've just made me feel very old[ grin]

I wasn't allowed to read Enid Blyton,must ask why one day but they seem a whole world away.

Tis not rudeness I'm worrying about but upsetting her and her view of her safe little world.However surely she is old enough to know the world isn't all hearts and flowers?

OP posts:

Original poster

PolkadotCircus · 23/01/2013 14:33

Oh thanks Cory,I'll avoid those for now.Are those the grittiest then,do you think the rest would all be fine?

OP posts:

StanleyLambchop · 23/01/2013 14:34

I would avoid 'Lily Alone' where Mum goes on holiday and leaves Lily alone to care for her siblings, and 'My Sister Jodie'- this had me in tears as Jodie dies by falling out of a castle tower at the end of the book. It is seriously tragic. I personally do not like the JW books but my daughter did enjoy them, with the two mentioned above I did not know what they were about before she read them, or else I might have tried to persuade her to read something else.

Original poster

PolkadotCircus · 23/01/2013 14:36

Stanley,what happens at the end of the Lily one? Will defo avoid the tower death one!

OP posts:

DeWe · 23/01/2013 14:37

Dd2 loved JW last year (she's 9) and read through most of them. However I did remove the Girls in Love series, mostly because the one I flicked through was talking about being too fat and the main character was getting anorexic, which I didn't like the idea being planted in dd2's head really. That's the only onse I've removed though.

Interestingly dd1 can't stand them and wouldn't read them at all, and she reads almost anything you wave at her, dd2's much more picky.

cory · 23/01/2013 14:40

Agree with Stanley, My Sister Jodie is really sad.

The Lottie Project is more suitable to her age and quite positive. Double Act is also fine. Also Sleepovers. The Suitcase Kid should be fine if she can cope with Cookies.

Original poster

PolkadotCircus · 23/01/2013 14:43

That's another one off the list then. She wants to read Whalesong but it looks as if the mum is in a coma-does she make it?

OP posts:

StanleyLambchop · 23/01/2013 14:43

Polkadot- If I remember rightly at the end of 'Lily Alone' social services do catch up with the children and they get taken into care, just as Mum arrives home, I think it ends with Mum vowing to get them back and be a better mother in the future. Not a happy ending, but at least no death or anything!

Original poster

PolkadotCircus · 23/01/2013 14:44

Has read Sleepovers and Double Trouble,we've got The Lottie Project so I'll dig it out.

OP posts:

Arcticwaffle · 23/01/2013 14:47

I've encouraged my 3 dds (aged 8-12) to leave the grittier JWs for secondary age, my 8yo hasn't read them, but I don't put very much effort into stopping my dds reading them. One thing I do notice is that though the subject matter is quite gritty and my dds are quite sheltered in some ways (we live in a nuclear family, no drug addicts or DV or homelessness as part of our daily life) they have quite a few friends whose lives are not totally different from a JW book. Their aunt died of cancer, a friend has a mother in prison with drug addiction, another friend was neglected as a baby and then adopted. So I find it quite a useful way into discussing these things.

My sweet and innocent 12yo, who still seems years away from teenagerdom, is currently trying to support her friend (who seemed equally sweet and innocent til lately) who is rapidly developing anorexia and self-harming. These problems are all around and maybe if they're going to experience them, either at first hand or vicariously, then JW is a gentle introduction.

cornflakegirl · 23/01/2013 14:52

My DS is 7 and he really likes them too. We actually listened to Cookie as an audio book in the car on holiday last year, and I didn't have any trouble with it (the dad doesn't actually chop the rabbit's head off iirc, just leaves its cage open so it escapes and a fox or summat gets it - although still upsetting for the little girl). I thought it was a really great story and gave a very positive message for dealing with controlling behaviour and poor self esteem.

DS has just finished reading the Hetty Feather trilogy and really enjoyed them.

I think if you look on the JW website there's a section that tells you what ages the books are aimed at, which might help if you want to filter a bit.

My parents let me read (pretty much) whatever I wanted when I was growing up and although I read some weird stuff I don't remember being upset by it. It was only ever the slightly dodgy films that gave me nightmares! Obviously this won't be the case for all children, but I'm hoping that I can basically let DS self-censor - he's reading the Harry Potter books at the moment, and I've told him to stop if there's anything he doesn't like.

QuickLookBusy · 23/01/2013 14:53

YABU

Some of her books are very suitable for an 8 year old. Some are not. I think at 8 still need to monitor the books she reads carefully.

When my dd read GoodNight Mr Tom aged 9, she had terrible nightmares about the baby dying. If I'd known about the baby I would have left it for a while, or been able to warn her about it.

She still hasn't forgiven me and she's 22

Hullygully · 23/01/2013 14:53

I have never censored anything and I found that both my dc self-censor, they just hand books back to me and say that it's a bit old for them.

Primrose123 · 23/01/2013 14:56

I think they're more suitable for older children myself. My DD enjoyed some of them at that age, but I did feel that some of them were too old for her and told her she could have them when she was older.

If it's any help, these are some of the books she loved:

All Enid Blyton books ( I know some people don't like them, but I explained to her that they were written a long time ago, and she could see the snobbery etc. herself)
The roman mysteries by Caroline Lawrence.
The Lady Grace mysteries.
My story books, fictional books written as diaries about women or girls from different times in history.

Primrose123 · 23/01/2013 15:02

My DD also loved all the Harry Potter books, and is still a huge fan at 15. A couple of years ago I heard a noise from her room and went in to find her in tears (and she hardly ever cries). I asked her what was wrong, and she said to me, "Dumbledore is dead!" She was devastated!

Thewhingingdefective · 23/01/2013 15:31

YANBU. Your daughter, your decision. Just be ready to discuss any of the issues raised in the books. In fact, read them yourself first before you decide whether they are suitable for your child.

If you have no qualms with your DD reading them then it's really nobody else's business.

KittyLane1 · 23/01/2013 15:32

I think it is great that your dd is reading a lot! My parents never censored what I was reading and let me read books like a boy called it etc at that age, even Bernard Hill and Bram Stoker because that's what I liked, and have turned it into a career. So for me, I would let her read anything and everything and you will notice how much her school work and vocabulary improves because of it x

mummymeister · 23/01/2013 15:36

i dont like censoring books for my DC's either but neither do i want them to have to read about all the crap that goes on in the world just yet. i am not a fan of JW - tracey bloody beaker on tv started that but thats a whole other thread. There are so many more age appropriate books for an 8 year that arent all fluffy and lovely flower fairy type things that it is worth going into a good bookshop and having a chat with a keen member of staff. My girls at 8 loved Mallory Towers, JeremyStrong, Roald Dahl to name a few. FWIW though i do think you have dealt with the issues up until now really well.

BeanJuice · 23/01/2013 16:21

There are a few which might be a bit mature and others which will be fine.

I never really liked her books myself when I was younger if I'm honest!

badtemperedaldbitch · 23/01/2013 16:29

I don't have her books in my home, there's nothing she writes about that I feel is relevant to my dd who is beginning to feel that she's not normal cos her parents are together!

Personally I find her to. Each a hypocrite, complaining about how kids talk to adults . The interviewer said 'but you write characters like that'

She said something along the lines of.... I might write like that but it doesn't mean that I agree with it!

ll31 · 23/01/2013 16:55

But badtetc does ur daughter not have right to choose her reading material?
Also be honest which of us isnlt a hypocrite sometimes

fuzzpig · 23/01/2013 17:08

I wouldn't. Loads of them are fab but some are (in my library at least) classed as teen fiction rather than junior fiction, implying that they are not suitable for DCs as young as 8. Can't remember exactly which ones but I think it includes the girls out late/girls in tears series?

Obviously not as clear cut as that and you know your DD best, but maybe it'd be worth googling synopses first if there's any you aren't sure about.

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