To still be feeling like this?

[Raspberryyogurt]

ExFiancé left me 7 weeks ago just out of the blue walked out on us, We had recently planned to TTC. I had to move back in with my parents which hasn't been the best of times.

I have a 16 month old DS and 2 days after my ex left I found out that I am pregnant with DC2.

He refuses to pay anything towards DS and I have only just changed the details over for CB to be payed to me as he refused to hand the details over and has kept the money since the split for himself.

I had my first midwifery appointment last week to be told that I will be consultant led and have extra scans, tests and be closely monitored which has scared me a bit as I just want the baby to be healthy but I can't help but worry. I have my first scan next week so I just hope that everything is okay.

Ex sees DS once every week/two weeks by choice.

I can't help but still feel completely devastated, I can't sleep at night, I cry everyday because of it and I worry about what will happen in the future while ex goes out when he wants, wherever he wants with no emotional attachment to me or DS or our baby. He has a car and I have been left without one as I needed to sell it to pay for a move whilst we were together.

He told me that he isn't interested in knowing anything about the baby as he would 'Have to talk to me' to find out so he just wants to see him/her when they are born. This broke my heart.

I am still completely in love with him, Please tell me this will stop.

I don't know how much more I can take, I just want him back.

Of course you are not being unreasonable in still feeling devastated, your life has been shattered at a time when you are most vulnerable. My heart goes out to you.

Thank you panda.

It is getting harder everyday rather than easier. :( I love him so much and just want him to come back to me.

How awful. Has he given you any explanation of why he's left or why he doesn't want to speak to you? (Don't feel like you have to write it on here, but I'm just thinking if he hasn't given you any kind of closure that'll make it harder). I can't even imagine how you must be feeling but of course YANBU to still be devastated. It will take time, but it will stop. I passionately believe that things work out ok in the end - even when you feel like you're at your lowest & can't imagine it getting any better, things slowly start to turn around until one day it is history & the hurting has gone. And once this absolute wanker (sorry - I know you say you love him, but no good man would walk out on his pregnant fiancee & child) is out of your head & your heart you will find you are a much stronger person than you ever realised . x

He has refused to talk to me since he left, I have been asking for an explanation and he ignores me.

I am 20, i feel as though my life is over already. I love DS more than the world and i will love this baby equally as much but i cant help but feel as though i will never feel happy like i used to with him ever again.

It's completely normal to still be feeling this way. You are recovering from your ex's actions and awful behaviour and your life has changed drastically in a short space of time. It will take time to recover from this, but it does get better. It won't always be like this.

I hope this doesn't sound patronising but at 20 you have so much ahead of you and so much potential for happiness. The feeling that you won't ever be as happy as you were with this man will fade. You will be happy again. Your life is far from over.

There is a charity for single parents called Gingerbread:
www.gingerbread.org.uk/

If you need information or support they have lots to offer.