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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be annoyed ex is using pics i took on a dating website?

22 replies

emilysheart · 19/01/2013 23:04

so a week after we split up he's back on a dating site using pics took at things we did together 1st one was a group thing i didnt mind so much but told him i think its abit out of order then another goes up from a dirty weekend we had. i feel like its wrong lto use these to advertise for someone else and cheapens wht we had somehow aibu?

OP posts:
TheFallenNinja · 19/01/2013 23:05

Forget it, move on.

lowercase · 19/01/2013 23:08

ive seen wedding photos used on dating sites !

you dont own the person, or the pictures.

i agree with ninja. move on.

WorraLiberty · 19/01/2013 23:09

As long as you're not in the photos I don't see what the problem is.

How do you know about them anyway, unless you're on the same site?

anothershittynickname · 19/01/2013 23:09

YABU for the reasons stated above.

And how do you even know?

ParsleyTheLioness · 19/01/2013 23:10

I think it is in bad taste, and YANBU. However, it shows on one level that is a good thing he is an ex...

Original poster
emilysheart · 19/01/2013 23:25

i know he was on there because i found out he had joined it when we broke up once before and i searched him this time the whole thing has been a long mess and i am every bit the bitter ex and need to move on just seems wrong to me the guy has hundreds of pics of himself just hurts he is using those i guess thanks x

OP posts:
TheDetective · 19/01/2013 23:28

He's a twat. Good riddance.

But YANBU to be annoyed. But YABU to let the bastard get to you. Allow yourself to remind you why he is your ex, and then move on. He isn't worth the emotion.

Easier said than done, I know.

Piemother · 19/01/2013 23:28

Exh did this. Not that I'd even want to look this time around abut I wouldn't be surprised.
You just have to laugh it off and think if him as a bullet dodged because they really are if their ethics are that poor Hmm

WorraLiberty · 19/01/2013 23:30

You need to let him and this go

And stop stalking looking for him on the internet.

namechanger11111 · 19/01/2013 23:40

My ex has done this too. The picture is over 8 years old and from a distance. I told him he'd get done for false advertising and he put a more recent one up too.

I wouldn't worry about it don't waste your energy.

Original poster
emilysheart · 19/01/2013 23:45

thank you i am trying to move on we tried to stay friends but really that has just prolonged it all. i will vow to myself now not to do any more stalking lookin at him online

OP posts:
HopAndSkip · 20/01/2013 10:53

It is tacky and cheap of him to do, but don't let him know its getting to you.

SueDoku · 20/01/2013 11:59

You might mention that copyright of photos is held by the person who took them - so he's breaching copyright law if he uses the pic without your written permission.... Just a thought...Wink

chocoluvva · 20/01/2013 13:43

Aww :(

That must be horrible for you.

Easier said than done I know, but well done for deciding not to look at his online stuff.

Good advice from HopAndSkip.

OkayHazel · 20/01/2013 14:41

I think the best advice here is stop stalking your ex. It will only end painfully.

Angelfootprints · 20/01/2013 16:49

1 week and he is on a dating site already- yanbu. Good riddance I say.

DuckworthLewis · 20/01/2013 16:59

Yup, been there - YANBU, it does feel like such a slap in the face, doesn't it?

If it makes you feel any better, for me it was about 5 years ago and despite being a snotty, sobbing mess at the time, now I really couldn't give a flying fuck.

Guide26 · 20/01/2013 23:07

You're not being unreasonable, my ex has done this with so many photos I've taken of him, he was quite a lonely man and only really had photos done when I took them of him so every photo hes got online are the ones that I've taken, the best bit is where he lies and says it someone else behind the camera lol or puts a caption saying something like out with his new gf and its a pic I've taken a few years ago.

I think its quite a sad thing to do really, I personally look at photos and they remind me of the times that photo took place, I wouldnt want that hanging over a dating profile but I guess everyone is different!

Catchingmockingbirds · 21/01/2013 01:12

It sounds to me like he put that particular pic up for a reaction. You complained that he used a pic taken on a group night out so then he uses a picture from a dirty weekend? Don't give him the reaction he's looking for, just try and move on and remember why he's an ex.

Original poster
emilysheart · 21/01/2013 16:36

thanks SueDoku i did mention the copyright actually but i dont think he gets it? this has made me realise what a cheap nasty lowdown punk the guy is after seeing things thru rose tinted specs for so long i realise he has been playing some weird games for a while and maybe just wants the reaction so im done not giving him the satisfaction

OP posts:
OTheHugeManatee · 21/01/2013 17:47

Don't stalk your ex on dating sites. Simple.

VBisme · 21/01/2013 18:06

Sorry, that can't be nice, but why were you looking in the first place? It was never going to make you feel good.

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