To think that toddlers under about 2.5 should be supervised on soft play?

[PartyFops]

I am very lucky in that we have a really nice and pleasant soft play place near me (as I know alot of them are really horrid). I only go during school hours as my daughter is only 20 months. She is very able to climbs over the whole frame, with me helping her.

Today when we went there was a little boy who must not have been much more than 2 was left by his mother/nanny/ granny whatever just to play on his own. I saw him fall down a big drop and I checked he was OK and he happily played on, a short while later he fell again and was crying, I waited for a short while as dd was climbing up a ladder ahead of me and I couldn't just go running off, no one went to help him, so I went and got him up and he stopped crying. At this point the mother/nanny/granny or whoever she was came and got him and took him home.

This playframe is aimed at over 5s but is easy for little ones as long as they have some assistance and someone ensuring they don't throw themselves off great heights.

I felt so sorry for him and his carer was just sat having coffee and a gossip.

No YANBU. Mine are way too old for softplay but were always closely supervised. Ball pits in particular are dangerous - child going underneath unnoticed or a child jumping in on top of them. If I found (like you) that I had to help another child who was distressed but not mine, I would refer to the staff so they could tell the parents to supervise properly or leave.

Yanbu. I also think that parents/careers should keep an eye on the over 2.5s (if nothing else to check that they're not beating each other up.)

YANBU. I supervised DS1 at soft play until he was about 4.5. DS2 is nearly 5 but has mobility problems so I still supervise him and I can't imagine just leaving DS3 (aged 2) in there while I sat and had a drink unless it was one of those tiny soft plays that is really just a cafe with a slide and ball pool.

Depends. Sometimes you have to take an older kid to the loo for two minutes and it's easier to just go than fish around in the balls for the little one during which time the older one has weed on the floor. Obviously if a kid is really hurting themselves and no carer is allowed to help that's rubbish but otherwise I kind of think soft play is a good place to learn a (small) bit of independence. And I would expect to help out any kids I saw in trouble even if they weren't mine - just as I would hope others might help mine if I was rescuing the other one from the top of the slide or what have you.

So are they safe? I've never really trusted the safety element (despite having taken all of mine) I hover around the various points with a face!

I'm worried most of the time , especially when I can't see my DD!

yanbu my dd has cerebral palsy so I still follow her around soft play (much to her annoyance!) even now she's 5 but am often amazed at the age of children going around unsupervised. I've often had to help little kids up to the more difficult slides etc or pick them up after accidents as there are no parent/carers around.

YANBU about an adult being around but I don't get into the soft play area with my DDs (2 and 4) unless one of them gets into a spot of trouble and even then I'll see if they're likely to recover themselves. I do keep an eye and an ear out for them but it might seem like I'm not.

I work in a soft play area and the amount of parents/carers who don't supervise their children is shocking. They would rather be sitting drinking coffee, chatting or reading a magazine. One child stripped off naked and was running around and when we went looking for the parent he was lying in the corner on one of the leather sofas sleeping.

i think all kids need supervising in these places. Little ones obviously more so, older ones making sure you can see them.obviously there are exceptions when you arent watching them but you get the jist

However, you could equally start a thread saying AIBU to hate the helicopter parents in soft play? and everyone would agree too. DD (25 mo) is an independent little soul. I always have an eye on her but I'm not hovering around. I am not the mother with a magazine and coffee but I am not over DD all the time.

I will make a disclaimer that the soft play near me that I use is aimed at younger children and it is quite small. The living hell that is the other one... well I just wouldn't. Without dipping DD in bleach after and teaching her martial arts before.

i always seem to collect other children while there, i end up like the pied piper with random chatty kids following me and my dds round asking me for help. i have to ask them to leave us while we eat and had to repeatedly tell 1 boy i was not buying his lunch as he pulled up a chair
no parents in site.
i always get asked for a penny for the carousel. NO.

Yanbu, am really surprised someone left a child of that aged playing unsupervised.

Well it is harder if you have more than one and tbh I have never followed mine around, I make sure I sit so I can see them and if they need me then I go to them, but equally I don't jump up at every fall/trip over as often they just get up and carry on. I often call to them 'jump up you're ok' obviously if they were properly upset or hurt I would comfort them but knocks and bumps are part of childhood and don't all require attention.

YANBU. All kids need supervising on softplay, to protect themselves and others. especially when mixed age groups as the bigger ones, while able to take care of themselves, may squish the littlies.

I'm not a big fan of the larger softplay places when you can't see where they are or who they are with. all the charging around in confined spaces with strangers can often make for trouble...

My 2.9 year old is more than capable of scaling the heights of our local soft play and so long as I can see him I'm quite happy to let him do so and have done for a while. It's a big soft play but the times we go it is nearly always quiet. Tbh he's so blinking independent he gets frustrated with me tagging along anyway and is more than capable. If it was very busy and I was unable to keep an eye on him from my table then I'd follow him round, more to make sure he doesn't get his head stood on, although in my experience the bigger kids love having a little one to guide around (I do have a 9 year old dd as well so she is usually on hand to go and rescue him if needed as well.)

Depends on the soft play. Our local one has a dedicated toddler section which has sofas right next to it where you can see the entire area. It's fenced off and padded and I leave DS to play there whilst I watch him from the sidelines. He's 20mo and very physically able when it comes to climbing etc.

DD is 5 and I've not supervised her for the last year or so. Nobody's suffered an injury and if they take a little tumble they just get up and get on with it.

I do take them to a smallish one though because the biggest one scares the crap out of me - you can't see them, the frames are 5 stories high and there's too many places to lose them. They have WiFi for parents but I think they'll be 10 before I get to use it...

I would always advise supervision of pre-schoolers.One of my monkeys boys at teh age of 3 climbed up the inside of the netting surrounding the playframe and fell about 15 ft and broke his arm.

YANBU, and it pisses me off no end when parents/carers expect other parents/carers to look after their kids while they sit and read a fecking magazine. It's not the hairdressers.

On the other hand, it makes me v appreciative of the parents who aren't lazy/neglectful - who keep their distance, keep a watchful eye out and intervene when necessary. and who won't just step over someone else's kid if they've just had a nasty fall. World would be a better place etc etc.

"Who keep their distance, keep a watchful eye out and intervene when necessary" this!!

YANBU!
I make my 8 year old DD come to follow around my 3 year old whilst I sit on my backside.... She does love it and often manages to collect a gaggle of pre schoolers.

If I went without DD1 I wouldn't just let my DD2 run around on her own

I never go in prime time school holidays, awful places!

Yes, 5madthings. I know it crops up a fair bit, but it's not like the only 2 parenting choices are 'sits-on-lazy-entitled-arse-reading-magazine' and 'neurotic-helicopter'.

I think a few parents genuinely don't understand what a soft play is. Or actually any parent and child group. The basic rule is - unless you are paying someone else, or they have specifically agreed, to act in loco parentis, then you are still a parent with parental responsibilities.

There's a really lovely group near us in a gym - a parent and under 5 group - where the kids do a mix of structured stuff and freeplay romping around, with trampolines and mats etc. Good fun and good value. Goodnatured and a really nice mix of people (lot of mums and dads, probs because it is more of a 'gym' environment than a 'baby' one IYSWIM). However.... one dad turns up with his daughter (under 3), goes and lies on a mat in the corner to have a sleep. I and several others have picked this little girl up several times from nasty falls, and once when she'd managed to get out of the main door (to the lobby and carpark...), crying and asking for her mummy. Returned to father - who had to be shaken awake, ffs - who just said 'uh, right, thanks', told her off and went back to sleep.

I know the staff were aware and I think they've had a word now (haven't seen dad or daughter for a couple of weeks now), but it gave them an awkward situation to handle.

Depends on the child, the soft play setup, the number of kids playing on it etc etc

My dd is 2.8 and we go to soft play all the time. We prefer to go to a couple of smaller ones where it's easier to keep an eye on the kids, but we definitely sit and have a hot drink and flick through a magazine. I'm watching, and listening, and I do go to them if they're hurt or intervene if it looks like they're in trouble with another child, but I'm not going to helicopter around them constantly. We stopped going round with dd about a year ago (making sure she stayed in the under 3's area) but since being over 2 she goes in any area and is just as independent as her older brother, if not as fast. In fact the only issue we've ever had was with her randomly smacking other kids when she was under 2 but she's grown out of that now.

The only time we worry now is when the place is heaving with kids, especially older ones as they whizz around playing manhunt type games and taking over certain sections of the play area so the smaller kids can't get down from the upper level. Oh and the bloody idiot "fun!" dads who fling themselves around the play area at top speed to try and keep up with their 8 year old and end up kicking toddlers in the face.

Ok I fully admit to being a 'helicopter' parent when I take ds who is 2.8. There's too many naughty boys and girls and he's been hit and bitten before and I'm not prepared pay £5 in and to let them do that to my son!

There is a difference between 'supervising'and 'following' IMO. I spend half the tome playing with DS almost 2 and i also let him get on with it. But our softplay is very small and i can still see him

DS got a black eye in the baby area of soft play not that long ago. I was right beside him. So at least some supervision is required. To stop them injuring others too.

Once DS is tall enough to climb everything in the big part of our soft play I will leave him to it a bit more. At the moment I follow him. He's 21mo. We only go first thing in the morning though, when there are never more than 5 children.