in worrying about how much junk food my toddler always seems to want?

[loveroflife]

Ds (2) is of a normal weight but is always wanting junk food. I don't give it to him, but that doesn't stop him wanting it.

Today, he threw a tantrum at a toddler group because I wouldn't let him have another digestive biscuit. He has one once a week at the same group. However, whatever group we go to he always hangs around the biscuit tin shouting and pointing at them and quite frankly it is becoming an issue.

I do try and hide the biscuits but that's not fair on others who want one!
One biscuit for him is never enough, but my theory is if I totally deprive him he will go beserk when he has them at friends etc.

He also throws tantrums in shops grabbing packets of crips and chocolate bars (even when in his buggy, damn those till point displays!) and it's a real battle to grab them off him and say no.

He also always makes a beeline for other children's snacks but ONLY if it is crisps, biscuits, crackers etc. He would never try and steal a grape or a piece of apple!

DH and I can't eat anything 'naughty' in front of him because he gets so upset and wants a crisp, piece of chocolate etc. We don't have junk food on display and make a point of eating fruit in front of him and sticking to healthy choices.

Yesterday, I met a friend and her ds for coffee and and ordered ds a sandwich - however, friend and I had cake and again he was shouting and pointing at it until I did on this occasion cave in (ashamed) and give him a bit because so many people were just staring at us in horror.

This is what he had today and is pretty typical of his diet.

Awake at 7am - Milk
8am - Small bowl of shreddies and fruit smoothie
10am - box of raisins
12pm - 3 Fishfingers and peas (ignored the peas) and half a slice of wholemeal bread
3pm - Cereal bar (low sugar)
6pm - Lasagna and veg (ignored veg) followed by plum fromage frais.

He will have some milk before bed at 7pm...

Am I doing anything wrong? Feeding him too much or little? He doesn't like fresh fruit and veg despite enjoying it when we started BLW'ing. I now have to give him his fruit via a smoothie every morning and sneak veg into spag bol etc.

Does anyone have any advice? We can't go ANYWHERE without it becoming a real issue....

So give him another digestive. You are doing exactly what you don't want to do, making it an issue so he wants to gorge on it.

It won't kill him to have 2 digestives rather than just one.

And of course he wants it, don't you?

If he eats well 99% of the time, let him have what he wants the rest of the time.

I have done, but he wants more and more and more. 2 becomes 3, 3 becomes 4.

He almost has no self control and wants the crisps/chocolate in shops EVERY occasion we go out...

Sounds pretty normal to me.

Be careful not to make things into "forbidden fruit" though as that could have the undesired effect of making things worse. Everything in moderation is a much better message than "good food and bad food"

He won't understand why mummy is allowed cake and he isn't either! I know if there was cake nearby and I was given a butty I would want the cake instead to!

If you know he has this 'issue' why would you want to eat things you forbid him in front of him?

I'm not surprised people were staring at you in horror. You and your friend get cake and none for him?

Nice!

So CaptChaos everytime you have cake you give it your kids as well do you?

You ate cake in front of a two year old and were surprised he wanted some? A bit of cake is fine, you are making big food issues here about what foods he can't have. Lighten up. What does your dp think

Why wouldn't you? If its good enough for you why can't your child eat it?

Otherwise wait until he is in bed to eat it!

If course he has no self control, he's a toddler.

And, yes, every time I have cake or whatever in front of my child, he gets some too.

It's a bit much to eat cake in front of a 2 year old and expect him not to want it.

Does he have tantrums about anything else?

Everything in moderation might give you a less dramatic day to day life.

A piece of cake isnt going to kill him. I cant believe you are actually wondering if its normal for him to want cake if you have some infront of him.

Lighten up. Seriously. No food is bad for anyone. Its all about balance and moderation.

I was told raisins surprisingly bad for teeth, like toffees - the sticky sugar is a bigger to clean off properly and toddler teeth brushing is always a bit tricky. Was told to limit and give cheese chunk afterwards to neutralize mouth sugars.

I wouldn't eat cake without sharing it either.

I basically eat what he eats when he is awake and then eat more if I need it when he naps or has gone to bed.

So breakfast - we both have toast and Greek yoghurt, and an apple.
Snack - more apples and maybe half a scone or breadsticks.
Lunch - we shared a jacket potato with tuna, Philly, and green beans with olive oil then grapes and melon.
Snack on waking - apple or banana or cheese biscuit plus cheddar
Supper - sausage, meatballs, grilled burger or fish finger or breaded fish with jacket potato chunks and broccoli then warm milk

Plus water on demand and diluted OJ with meals.
But if he sees biscuits or cake at playgroup or whatever he can have some. No biggie. We don't have them at home. He is just two as well.

At supermarkets he is allowed to throw stuff into the trolley and play with a special dinosaur whilst eating a big breadstick or apple and I position him away from checkout sweets where possible.

Eating cake in front of a small child is seriously mean!

Yes my dentist says raisins are very bad for teeth and should be avoided as an every day snack. Cake is better for teeth!

Lover probably, but then I also wouldn't basically tease a small child with forbidden foods.

I would also give him a crisp if I was eating them, or a piece of chocolate, because eating things in front of a toddler and not allowing him any is mean.

Really? I don't want him getting into the habit of having cake and biscuits all the time. He's only 2....

We have a running joke in our house that we have to pay a 'Bear Tax' (DD 18 months being known as the little bear) on all food items. Currently we judge it to be at about 25%, and yes we do share everything with her, I wouldn't dream of eating something as delicious as a bit of cake in front of her and then expect her not to want some to so I would always give her a bit (or wait until she's out of the room to scoff it).

I think it's completely normal. Every toddler I know tries to help themselves every time I give her something too, whether it be grapes or a chocolate biscuit. If you don't want your toddler to eat anything sugary or salty or whatever, I'm afraid you're going to have to cut it out of your own diet altogether too and keep the poor guy hidden from all other children until he's about 8!

It does seem that the issues are around your own behaviour about food, your son sounds like a normal 2 year old

"Well I would replace the high-fructose, low fibre smoothie with milk. I would replace the raisins and the high-sugar processed cereal bar with eg an apple slice or two or some carrot batons or some orange segments. I wouldn't give the sweet fromage frais unless the veg were eaten."

He refuses all fresh fruit and veg. Seriously. That's why I've resorted to the smoothie. What else can he snack on if he won't eat any fruit or veg sticks except from breadsticks and carbs? He won't eat cheese chunks and doesn't really like meat either - won't eat roast chicken, ham, etc.

Ok, well, you come over here and I'll eat things you really like in front of you, but not allow you any. I will, in fact, just get sneaky about eating it. I'll then give you stuff that you don't really like.

All in the interests of you eating healthy of course, not because I like torturing you or anything! He must have learned the behaviour from somewhere.

If you don't want him to have cake don't eat it in front of him

YABU. Have my fruit and veg phobic 2 year old for the day and you will see how lucky you are