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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

re: woman unpacking my basket yesterday in shop

81 replies

FrozenNorthPole · 15/01/2013 14:14

I can't work out whether she was being unreasonable, or I was ...

I was loading my shopping onto the conveyor belt at Wilkinsons yesterday. I was in a queue of about 3 people - it wasn't busy. Had 2 big packs of nappies, some cleaning supplies and a colouring book for DD1. Shop assistant asked if I wanted a bag, I said yes (had forgotten the one I usually bring) and then shop assistant gave me a tiny bag. I explained that my stuff would not fit in the tiny bag. Shop assistant found me a larger bag and resumed scanning stuff; I resumed packing it.

At this point, the woman behind me in the queue began removing my shopping from my basket and putting it on the conveyor belt by the armful, saying crossly, "I'm in a massive hurry, and it looks like you're going in slow motion". I don't know whether she was talking to the shop assistant or me - we were both moving at a pretty average speed as far as I know. I can understand her being frustrated if she was running late but I can't imagine reaching into someone else's shopping basket and removing all their stuff.

I'm not massively offended or anything, although in her haste she did drop quite a few of my items off the edge of the belt. AIBU to be surprised by this, or was this a perfectly reasonable thing to do in the circumstances?

OP posts:

minibmw2010 · 15/01/2013 18:43

She was quite rude but you should have unpacked your basket fully before you started packing up so you were both in the wrong.

Sparklingbrook · 15/01/2013 18:44

People in a hurry at the checkout in Morrisons tend to ram the trolley up my arse.

TheFallenNinja · 15/01/2013 18:46

She would have received a full and frank assessment I'm afraid. I had some old duck glowering at me in the po queue because I wouldn't let her "nip in quickly as she was in a hurry". Having been divorced twice I'm impervious to death stares. Took my own sweet time at the counter too.

jamdonut · 15/01/2013 18:50

I was just in Aldi. I had a huge trolley full, and was starting to put it on the conveyor belt when a woman with a basket came an put the separator on, and put her basket of things on the conveyor. Before she did this I was about to ask her, as I usually do when I have a lot to unpack, if she wanted to go in front of me, but I was so annoyed at her giving me so little room to get my stuff on. I kept pushing the separator back and had to pile my stuff on top of each other. She didn't bat an eyelid. I was fuming.

specialknickers · 15/01/2013 18:51

Delighted to see I'm not the only one who slows down when hurried... Drives dh mad when I do it when we get tailgated. I KNEW I wasn't being unreasonable.

OP this lady was being really very rude. I would have stopped packing entirely and thanked her profusely for a preposterously long time

zukiecat · 15/01/2013 18:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ChaoticintheNewYear · 15/01/2013 18:53

If the OP's Wilkinsons is like mine then you can only fit a few items on the conveyor before it's full. Maybe the OP thought she would pack a few items first to make room before putting the rest on.

girlsyearapart · 15/01/2013 18:56

Yep same in my wilkos chaotic the conveyor is a pretty pointless thing there..
You have to pack stuff before you can fit anything on

RoomForASmallOne · 15/01/2013 18:58

TheFallenNinja

...Having been divorced twice I am impervious to death stares...

Quote Of The Week.

CloudsAndTrees · 15/01/2013 18:58

She was rude, obviously, but she might have been having a particularly shit day, she might have been in a genuine hurry for a really good reason.

You never know what's going on in other people's lives.

AnnaRack · 15/01/2013 19:04

I'd have gone v e r y s l o w l y , then asked to put a few items back, then mislaid my purse, then conveniently "forgotten" my PIN then tried to pay in 2p coins

oldraver · 15/01/2013 20:07

jamdonut you shouldn't of piled your stuff on top of each other...you needed to shove the divider AND her stuff back

Peacocklady · 15/01/2013 20:25

When ds was 1 he was getting restless at the till as they do and so I was trying to cuddle him and unload. A nice assistant came to help by unloading for me. A woman came up and started putting all her things on the conveyor belt when I'd still got half a trolley full left so the assistant said something like "sorry I'm just helping this lady because she's got a baby" so she huffily took her stuff off again and said "well I've got two!" I was baffled because having 2 kids doesn't mean you can hijack someone else's conveyor belt and made me feel like I was doing soemthing wrong and wasn't entitled to the help!

Nanny0gg · 15/01/2013 20:30

As I unpack in a particular order so that I can pack in a particular order I would most definitely have said something.

And then suggested she go through the self-scanner if she was in that much of a hurry.

SanityClause · 15/01/2013 20:34

I do that special, particularly if it's a road where they won't be able to pass. It gives me great pleasure is the correct way to handle tailgating, as if they ram into you, any damage will be reduced.

RibenaFiend · 15/01/2013 21:41

This thread has me itching for someone to breach supermarket (or even shop!) etiquette with me now so I can go crazy. Alas, no such luck in my life (I obviously omit enough "unhinged woman" that the rude people avoid me)

MammaTJ · 15/01/2013 21:58

I would have shown her what slow motion really was, then struggled to find my card in my purse/pocket/deep in my handbag.

Bogeyface · 15/01/2013 22:12

I didnt read that she was packing, but talking to the checkout operator about the bags.

YANBU!

shesariver · 15/01/2013 22:18

To the people asking why OP was packing stuff in a bag when stuff was still in the basket I would take a guess its because of the teeny conveyor belts in Wilkinsons.

littleducks · 15/01/2013 22:19

Im guessing it was a short conveye belt and one of those huge baskets which you pull around on wheels so you end up having to unpack in batches

Original poster

FrozenNorthPole · 15/01/2013 23:20

"ChaoticintheNewYear Tue 15-Jan-13 18:53:12

If the OP's Wilkinsons is like mine then you can only fit a few items on the conveyor before it's full. Maybe the OP thought she would pack a few items first to make room before putting the rest on."

Yes, this - and to compound it, the 'stack' of pull-along baskets was so high (higher than I normally see them in Wilkos - assume low staffing or similar) that instead of placing my basket and goods on the top of the stack, moving all my items out onto the checkout surface and thence to the very short expanse of conveyor belt (why bother with a belt?!), I had to place my basket on the silver bit before the belt (bear with me) and move my items - in several stages - onto the belt bit which was pretty much filled by the two packs of nappies alone.

Phew - I hope that made sense ... !

OP posts:

ArtsMumma · 16/01/2013 01:54

I get shopping rage too, this is the kind of rudeness that really bugs me. You are not being unreasonable. My Mum once had an elderly lady (using the term very loosely) grab some fruit out of her hands, despite there being loads of it left in the box and tell her to f- off and find her own! I guess the unhinged have to shop too!

ChippingInNeedsSleepAndCoffee · 16/01/2013 02:08

'What the fuck on earth do you think you are doing? Get your hands OFF of my shopping and step away' with a death stare!!

Rude cow.

Catchingmockingbirds · 16/01/2013 02:21

She could have asked "Do you need some help?" then offer to empty your basket for you, but she should have never gone ahead and done it herself.

Was it her first time in a shop? It must have been, otherwise she'd have a firm grasp on checkout etiquette and know not to do this.

Loveweekends10 · 16/01/2013 04:50

OMG! I would have said. STOP PUT MY THINGS DOWN RIGHT NOW. And not continued until she put them down and stepped away from my basket.
Why would she think its okay to handle someone else's stuff? Grrr!

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