to expect a teacher to acknowledge me when I help in class?

[lerump]

I am a parent helper at school with several different classes, none of which my boys are in as it's school policy to help in other classes.

One of the teachers rarely acknowledges I'm there (by which I mean doesn't say a basic hello or goodbye let alone thank you) is off hand if she does speak to me and generally makes me feel unwelcome.

It's not the kids fault so I feel I should just persevere but it's getting me down. The last few occasions have been particularly bad including one where she took the class out mid session for an activity without speaking to me or telling me whether to wait for them or go home.

I don't have any problems in the other classes and I can't think of anything I've done that would cause this. She's never taught my kids so my interaction has been limited to this. Should I just stick it out?

She sounds dreadful if she is constantly loosing her temper and snatching things from your hands. I don't think I'd want parents behaving like that either. Probably just as well you are there watching!

Fakebook - oh that's interesting, I suppose it could be that. I'm very shy and I hadn't thought anyone would misread it as arrogance - did you really have this problem a lot? I'm not in the slightest bit arrogant and would absolutely hate people to think I was. I tend to find a lot of the louder parents a bit overwhelming but perhaps the teacher appreciates their confidence more.

I supppose I assume teachers would like someone who is quiet and gets on without disrupting the class - I would ask if I needed help and always try to catch her eye to say hello when I arrive but she avoids eye contact with me.

Thank you for all the opionions, I would never discuss it at school so it's useful to ask on here - I'm trying not to take it personally as I did overhear another parent on the playground being less than flattering about her so maybe it's not just me!

Instead of waiting to catch her eye, why not go up to her next time, touch her lightly on the arm, and say hello? See what she says?

Eating - I do try where possible but as I have to take younger ones into school then help afterwards in this class in another building, the children are already on the mat having register when I arrive and the layout of the room means we're on opposite corners.

She was in the corridor talking with her back to me last week so I did say hello but she barely acknowledged me and kept talking. I really do try as I think it's incredibly rude not to say hello to people myself.

I think I'm just going to have to get on with it and develop a thicker skin!

I think in that case I'd walk in, say a loud and breezy 'Hello Mrs X' and don't wait for a reaction from her, just park yourself down ready to start.

That way you are being polite, and if she ignores your obvious hello she will just look rude

I worked with a head teacher like this, it was a shame because I loved the job itself but felt awful a lot of the time I was there because of the apparent rudeness. What I started doing was just asking "is there anything I can do" because I hated sometimes feeling like I was standing around unwanted. This helped a bit because I could go off and do photocopying/laminating etc and I felt like I was being productive. It was very hard though, he seemed to have this attitude with me and a couple of others but didn't stop talking to one girl there, it really got me down! I still go into the school now to do a voluntary after school club and he is still like it sometimes when I try and say hello but thankfully don't have to deal with him too much anymore!

It's fairly obvious that she doesn't want you there isn't it? Talk to whoever arranges your classes and ask for different ones.

So you haven't got the message yet? She doesn't want you in her class. She is not your friend and doesn't want to be. Perhaps the other teachers will give you the pat on the head you crave?

pigsmummy - I know what you mean but is it up to her to go against school policy of having helpers? Funnily enough I was asked to help there as she didn't have any helpers but now wondering if this has happened and others have left before. The other classes have enough helpers already so I wouldn't transfer, just help less if I stop.

I'm not so determined to stay to prove a point regarding the teacher, just feel for the kids as many don't get reading time without helpers as they aren't heard at home.

Lovely. That was a bit nasty wasn't it!

Personally op, i would make another attempt and try to be more confident and upfront with her and if that doesn't work have a chat to the head teacher about it, particularly the losing her temper a lot thing.

wow lovely that's a bit harsh- it's not about pats on the head or thanks, just saying hello.

Don't worry about the kids, that's the school's job to see they get adequate reading time.

And it's quite unusual for a school to have so many helpers, so I'm sure they'll all be fine.

lovely sighs.

OP, what were the odds that the teacher in question would post on here?!?

Ignore the nastiness. YANBU. I buy my TAs (we don't get helpers, it is a secondary and no-one wants to help teenagers!) birthday and Christmas presents and thank you cards once a term. And I think that is fairly normal.