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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to find books and magazines by the toilet unnecessary and unhygienic

175 replies

SunsetMojito · 13/01/2013 21:50

I have even seen a magazine rack placed helpfully beside one!
Boak!
and how long to you actually need to spend in there that you cannot manage without reading?

OP posts:
PickledInAPearTree · 13/01/2013 22:28

Thanks a LOT goths! Grin

MurderOfGoths · 13/01/2013 22:28

You love me Pickled Grin

Milliways · 13/01/2013 22:28

Please recommend me the best magazines or whatever for when I have to occupy the bathroom for the day before a colonoscopy! :)

WorraLiberty · 13/01/2013 22:29

Do you wash your hands after you've been to the loo OP...or do you just lick your fingers clean?

If its' the latter then YANBU

BlackholesAndRevelations · 13/01/2013 22:29

bogey funnily enough, no I don't picture people shitting when I go into a toilet sans reading material! Just when I see books there, I think, "so that's what you read when you have a poo," and imagine them sitting there! Smile

Bogeyface · 13/01/2013 22:29

So we are all breathing shit vapour, right now?! Even shit vapour from the man that came to fix the washing machine and didnt even use the loo?!

[Mischievous emoticon]

MurderOfGoths · 13/01/2013 22:30

Oh yes Bogey Nice deep breaths now Grin

PickledInAPearTree · 13/01/2013 22:31

I dont see the harm

You just go in, pull down your trousers and pants. Sit on bog. Pick up book.

Poo.

Read a bit

Put book back

Wipe your arse

Flush

Wash hands.

At no point do you poke your finger in your poo and put it on the book?

neveronamonday · 13/01/2013 22:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WorraLiberty · 13/01/2013 22:32

At no point do you poke your finger in your poo and put it on the book?

What if there's no pen for the crossword?

PickledInAPearTree · 13/01/2013 22:32

have you seen those lights that show up piss stains? They were using them on Hotel Inspector or similar. Piss EVERYWHERE! Even on the ceilings.

Bogeyface · 13/01/2013 22:32

According to H, Steve Martin has a theory that above the Ozone Layer is the Fart Layer. He says that when the OL goes, the fart layer will fall to earth but the farts will not return to their original owner, so we have to save the OL in order to prevent us all being engulfed by other peoples old farts :o

BlackholesAndRevelations · 13/01/2013 22:32

My dp is currently exuding shit vapour next to me in bed Hmm

Greensleeves · 13/01/2013 22:33

At no point do you poke your finger in your poo and put it on the book?

unless it turns out to have been written by Martin Amis

I would hate to be a guest in some of your houses. Shoes off at the door and no books in the john. Shudder.

MurderOfGoths · 13/01/2013 22:33

never Just for you

Note the poo particles found in the kitchen two rooms away. Hope you don't eat in your kitchen either? Wink

Bogeyface · 13/01/2013 22:34

never there was a post a while back about a man (might have been her DH, not sure) who would take a sandwich and a drink up there with him.

I am pretty laid back about all things bodily, but that was a step waaaaaaaaay too far!

MurderOfGoths · 13/01/2013 22:34

worra I fell off my chair laughing at that!

Hassled · 13/01/2013 22:34

DS3 was once found reading on the loo while plugged into his iPod. When I say "found" - I went in to check he hadn't died because he'd been there for hours and wasn't responding to discrete knocks.

Fairylea · 13/01/2013 22:35

I read on the loo. Dh thinks I'm mad but I can't go without something.... !!

And it has to be a magazine or holiday brochure. Novels etc too much concentration. Magazines are just right, especially the ads !

I don't touch anyone else's toilet reading stuff though in other houses.

It's my one odd and probably disgusting habit.

Oh well......

Greensleeves · 13/01/2013 22:35

MIL used to get constipated when dh was a kid, she would bellow for him to bring her an apple to help her shift it

now THAT is grim

WorraLiberty · 13/01/2013 22:35

Good job you weren't on the loo then Goths Grin

Hassled · 13/01/2013 22:35

:o at Martin Amis. I'd love to make a dirty protest on a Martin Amis book.

BlackholesAndRevelations · 13/01/2013 22:36

Ps. When reading for purposes of helping along a constipated poo, shouldn't it be:

Pants down, sit on loo
Read
Read some more
Poo
Wipe
Flush etc

I have never understood people who sit in their own shit vapour rather than just wiping and getting the hell out of there.

MurderOfGoths · 13/01/2013 22:36

Quite Worra then poo particles would have been the least of my worries Grin

SunsetMojito · 13/01/2013 22:37

Now those of us with over active brains are having thoughts we'd rather not have about the apple!

OP posts: