A little advice needed

[glittertree]

Hi everyone I have posted here before but didn't get too many replies...I really need some advice I don't know what to do ....my mother in law has a terminal illness understandably she wants to spend as much time with her grandchild...but without sounding heartless she wants him every day the thing is I want to do things with my child as well and I feel I have to step back because she expects him to be doing these things with her....then she comes out with snidey comments if I do things with him such as oh it does you good to get out with him(as if I don't do anything at all) then she gets huffy if I do go out with him because she wants him....she spends most afternoons and evenings at our house ....the thing is I feel suffocated and I feel mean if I feel annoyed with her.....it's got to the stage he is starting to call her mummy what do I do am I being unreasonable ....she is dying but I am struggling with snide remarks such as did you feed him enough etc? And I need my time with him...sorry if its a ramble

YADNBU. Sorry to hear about her being terminally ill, but you still need to bond with and parent your child, and make sure he knows you/DH are his parents. Otherwise it's going to go from loosing his gran, which is upsetting enough, to him feeling like he's lost his mum if he's starting to get confused.

While it must be very hard for her, she has had her chance to raise children, and now it's yours, and she has the chance to be a grandma, come over and spoil him, accompany you on some day trips so on, but not to be regularly taking him alone when you're not happy about it.

Again, it's very sad that she is terminally ill. But i think people loose perspective a bit, any of us could die at any point, but we don't change how we act. A terminal illness doesn't mean they will die within that time frame.
My uncle passed away 2 weeks ago from cancer, after doctors predicting he had weeks, possibly months left in April 2011 when it was found to have spread.