Not allowed nuts in school

[pingu2209]

A friend of mine is really concerned about a letter home from school and subsequent conversation. Her dd is very fussy and will only eat peanut butter sandwiches. It is a long battle for her and the doctor is very concerned about her weight as she eats very very little. Has to be white bread, no crusts etc. I would go as far as to say it is an eating disorder - she is 9.

Her eating has to be tackled and the mum is getting help. So far the specialist help has said that it is a good idea for her to eat peanut sandwiches as this is pretty much all she will eat and will give her nutriants etc. They said the key is to increase the types of food, rather than take away what little she does.

But the school has said nobody is allowed any nuts, inc. peanut butter sarnies, in school as there are a handful of children with severe nut allergies - that could kill them.

My friend is at a loss. She asked whether her daughter could eat her sarnies away from the allergic children. The school has still said no, just incase there is peanut butter on her fingers etc that the allergic children could accidentally get it on them.

Who is being unreasonable?

Monkeynuts. I agree. This thread has shocked me. The selfish posters have shocked me.

You will find most parents of nut allergy sufferers dont want bans.

For Op
Anaphylaxis Campaign advice for schools

mushroom soup causes flight diversion admittedly it was contact, not airborne. I have heard of a reaction due to cheese in the inflight meals, think it was the reheating that caused the problem, rather than lumps of cold cheese. Don't know if that one is true or not.

I don't think I am especially selfish, I just don't want people telling my ds he is in a safe environment when he isn't. He needs to be vigilant and is at an age when he thinks that the HT sending a letter home actually means people will comply/remember/be as vigilant as me. I would be surprised if the amount of nuts in the school would go down by much if there was a ban. It's not a priority for other parents, they forget or don't care or can't understand the letter or can't read the packets etc.

The school are being unreasonable. There are two types of eating issues here, and the school need to find a way to take care of both of them.

The daughter eating lunch separately, then washing her hands and brushing her teeth if necessary, but she certainly shouldn't have the only food she is able to eat for lunch ruled out.

Ithinkofhappy thank you! You have given me some hope that anaphylaxis may not be inevitable should another reaction occur, something I have become v phobic about. It wasn't guesses, this was the information from the Allergy Consultant I saw in my teens. I can only think this was based on the research at the time and as my reactions have followed this pattern I have never thought to question (Google) it.

Nevertheless assuming the BBC Allergy page is correct and 'there's no predicting how a person may react', surely that is more reason to be vigilant.

Andro I feel for you, it must be tough. I never realised in RL how allergy sufferers were perceived. This thread has been enlightening.

All these people talking about peanut bans not being supported - surely they do at least reduce the risk? There is a ban on peanut butter and nuts at my daughter's nursery so I am happy to comply. If there wasn't a ban and I didn't take nut allergies seriously, I would send my DD in with all sorts of nutty treats and make a few poor children ill. Epi-pens would have to be adminstered, hospital dashes and medical aid would be required repeatedly and on a daily basis.

If they are not in place then the risk of your severely allergic child being in contact with nuts increases dramatically. Think of all the sweets/chocolate bars and so on filled with nuts?

Surely it's all about reducing risk?

but the mind just boggles about how someone with an allergy so severe will get through life. to the poster who wrote this, the answer is with extreme difficulty and it is a constant source of worry and anxiety for everyone.

A ban doesnt change anything as you should still act as if nuts are there. Its other peoples mistakes and complacency that leads to reactions.
Recent death of a boy was due to his family assuming that every branch of a chinese takeaway used the same recipe for ribs, unfortunately this branch used nuts and clearly had it on their menu but because of they had ordered the same thing from other branches they thought was safe.

bruffin, that's terrible.

The ban (in schools) IF adhered to does stop reception age child offering another child a peanut butter sandwich. That happened to a friend's 4 year old (very seriously allergic to nuts), thank goodness they had the common sense to say no.
Having seen a child (not the same one) crying because they were scared to eat lunch in school in case there were nuts in the meals and there Mum was not there to check the food, I would support a ban on nuts.

the life of someone with a nut allergy is more important then the faddy eating of your friends child. Your friend is being unreasonable.

Read the anaphylaxis campaign advice. Its all about education.
When my ds was 4 he was more than capable of saying no and asking. He disappeared in Burger King one day. I found him at the till telling them he couldnt eat his burger because of the sesame seeds on the bun

Op, you say in a later post that your friend's child will only eat less than a handful of foods, so presumably it's not just peanut butter?
And she hasn't actually been diagnosed with an eating disorder, the doctor just told her mum she's underweight?
Why is your friend pandering to this, to the point of potentially putting other children's lives at risk? .
If it was a genuine MH issue she should be getting professional help for her, not assuming her fads should be taken as seriously as someone with a genuine allergy.

bruffin, but how do you know that lives havent been saved it by?
As well as remaining constantly vigilant.
[I am not saying that I agree that all schools should have a blanket ban. To my mind,it depends on the actual children with nut allergy in each individual school. And even then, there may be ways round certain things]

Okay someone asked me a few pages ago what I, as OP, should suggest the school does. Obviously my opinions count for nothing in real life. I know of 1 child with a severe nut allergy, but I am sure there are more children, I just don't know how many.

Please please do not assume that my friend's daughter is a faddy eater, it goes way beyond that. I am very worried that she has actually got a full blown eating disorder. I can see this going down hill very fast and as she has so little fat on her, her life could also be in danger. This is a mental health issue, not a faddy eater issue.

As the eating disorder specialists have told my friend that as little fuss as possible should surround her daughter's eating and meals, and as they have also said that the girl should continue to eat the very few things she eats and work at getting her to eat more things, the suggestions of the girl not eating the peanut butter sandwich or to eat it in isolation and then have a full face and hand wiping session after - I think the specialists would be horrified. (I say this having had an eating disorder throughout my 20s).

I think the specialists should speak with the Head Master by phone (as they are unlikely to come to the school). They need to press upon the Head that the girl needs to eat her peanut sandwiches with all the other children and EVERYONE needs to wash their face and hands. My friend's daughter would be the only child allowed to have the peanut sandwiches though.

The children with the nut allergies need to be either sat well away from my friend's daughter, the hall is large. Or they need to be sat in a separate room. Clearly I think the former is preferable.

The school already have some sanitiser dispensers at every door to the hall so all children could be made to use it before they leave the hall and told to go wash their hands.

I have no idea whether the girl is in the same class as anybody with a nut allergy. She is in year 5 but the boy I KNOW has very serious nut allergies is in year 6 - but the school has mixed year groups and do have year 5 and 6 classes.

I thank my lucky stars that my children are human dustbins and are not allergic at all.

I don't think any school can put the health of one child above another, and at the moment they are. They can't see the seriousness of my friend's daughter's health. However, the experts can enlighten them.

How do you know that lives have been saved. If it was a way of saving life surely those that advocate for people with allergies would support a ban, but they dont for good reason.
How do you know that the complacency of a so called safe places havent led to more deaths.

Your friend INBU - the allergy foundation don't advise nut bans and they should know what they're talking about. Also the reaction sems extreme when you consider that some kids have severe dairy allergies but schools seldom ban dairy. Ask the school how they cope with dairy allergies and kids bringing cheese sandwiches to school.

This child is not simply a faddy eater and has a genuine eating disorder. Not eating lunch may not kill her instantly but sounds like it could have severe implications for her health and shorten her life. As someone who had eating issues myself at that age I know how important it is for the child's lunch to be fuss free.

Monkeynuts

Your friends child could eat other food but chooses not to, no matter how complicated that choice is, she could physically eat other foods. Speaking as a parent of a child who was anaphylactic I was often amazed at the ignorance of some people who think these allergies are in some way negotiable.

Someone with a mental health issue surrounding food does not just choose to have anxiety every single time they come across food, it is not a choice, and you are wrong that she could physically eat it if she wanted to. Have you got, or do you know anyone that has a genuine phobia?

In the same way that I am lucky enough never to have witnessed anaphylaxis, you are lucky enough not to have witnessed a fully grown intelligent adult shake and sweat have a full on panic attack because they are about to try a potato.

So speaking as someone who has, I am very disappointed at the ignorance of some people who think food phobias and eating disorders and mental illness is any way negotiable.

Really Monkeynuts, your selfishness and unwillingness to even try understand a genuine problem has astounded me.

bruffin. That is the problem with all health and safety. How to measure the amount of lost lives and injuries that havent happened as a result of policies and procedures put in place.

People with allergies dont always support a blanket ban so that as many people as possible are not inconvenienced. My own other reasons are in my post of 21.33pm.

bruffin again, sorry.
How did you find out that your child has outgrown peanut allergy?
How can you be confident that your 4 year old is going to be continually vigilant, each and every time?
And, I wanted to reiterate on something you said, either on this thread or the other one, so that people are clear.
In one of your posts, you said that airbourne nut allergy is a myth. Then, either on here, or the other thread, you qualified it by saying that some airbourne allergies are a myth in certain circumstances.
Just felt that should be resaid, else someone not reading all the threads, may well go away with a very wrong and potentially dangerous idea.

amillionyears - it has caused a flight to be diverted, I should know...I was the one who reacted! Nothing the airline could have done (they had already checked the meals on board and there was nothing planned that could have caused a reaction), it was a boy who had brought cheese on board and started to throw food around. I accidentally ingested it and the flight had to divert - it was scary and embarrassing in equal measure.

Or at least, I'm one who has reacted on a flight!

You were very unfortunate!

My ds was tested again when he was 12. Peanut allergy came back clear and he has eaten peanuts since. His other allergies have not cleared up. Apparently they used to think peanut allergy was for life but recent research shows about 20% grow out of it.
My ds was very good at asking, i was always being asled if ds could eat this or that because he checked first.
Being a teenager is a different story.

Schools can be controlled (to a degree) how would you control a work place environment?

I could have a peanut butter cookie in Starbucks and touch something else in the shoppping mall after.

The majority cannot bow to the minority continuously. I'm all for inclusion, but when you have to exclude the majority, then there is something very wrong.

I can understand why the allergy experts don't support a blanket ban but I don't see that there can be any other way.

Like it or not, people aren't vigilant and often can't be bothered checking properly.

I say that as someone whose sister has coeliac disease, granted it can't kill her but the disease is such that with every exposure to gluten the inflammatory process worsens and her symptoms become more severe.

I have lost count of the number of times that staff in restaurants have "assured" us that a certain product is gluten free/prepared separately from gluten products and my sister has spent the next few days vomiting, in terrible pain and with her mouth full of ulcers because there was some contamination from somewhere.

The severity is such that she must have different toaster, chopping boards etc so not even a trace of gluten can come into contact with her food. She has to have this at work and home (she doesn't even store her lunch in the communal fridge at work) and it affects every aspect of her life.

So while education is the best measure in an ideal world, sadly there are always people who can't be arsed don't put education into practice.