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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think 'posh' and 'rich' are two completely different things?

114 replies

Floogel · 11/01/2013 11:48

being wealthy does not make you posh, IMO

OP posts:
Bonsoir · 11/01/2013 13:53

They voted for Hollande Angry

Hammy02 · 11/01/2013 14:06

YANBU. I used to work with someone v.posh. generations of public school education, corderoy trousers, shooting at the weekend on parent's land etc. But he was always skint.

mummysmellsofsick · 11/01/2013 14:12

It's all about the accent and vocabulary...

EmpressMaud · 11/01/2013 14:14

Quite right.

PessaryPam · 11/01/2013 14:14

YADNBU. They are totally different things and these days they overlap less and less.

seeker · 11/01/2013 14:18

"The posh rich I know, love their smart cars and expensive clothes every bit as much as the new money. And they're not very interested in the rules IYSWIM"

Really? is it possible that they are not quite as posh as you think they are? Grin

becstarlightstarbright · 11/01/2013 14:21

I have a posh accent (went to public school, upper middle class upbringing) but am far from rich.

I'm never prejudiced about whether someone is posh or not, or whether someone is rich or not, but I do have quite the cat's bum mouth when it comes to ignorant people - posh or not. I don't mean lack of education, I mean rather the wilful trotting out of nonsense - racism being the most obvious example. When I hear ignorance, I think 'commoner' and according to DH I come over all patrician and superior, and my accent goes a bit Mitford. When I see money I think 'well played, good on you' as I assume they earned it. When I hear a posh accent I think 'Did you hate your school as much as I did?'

PostBellumBugsy · 11/01/2013 14:29

becstar - I can't believe you think they've earned their money - inherited surely to be properly posh! Wink

I can't remember who said it now (probably Nancy Mitford), but you can tell they are not one of "us", because they had to buy their own furniture (as in it wasn't handed down through the generations).

wordfactory · 11/01/2013 14:32

Seeker - I think in this as in many things you are out of date. Prince Charles drives a Rangie and an Astie lol! And the car park at my sons school is like the back lot of Top Gear.

becstarlightstarbright · 11/01/2013 14:37

Ah no, if they're really properly posh all the money went on trying to keep up the estate and on the taxes, they haven't inherited a bean!

That 'bought his own furniture' quip was Alan Clark talking about Michael Heseltine. Alan Clark was proper posh and looked down on Michael Heseltine - who was public school, wealthy family and rich - so we'd call him posh. But to Alan Clark he wasn't. I was talking to an aristo once about class and said that there must only be the Royal Family that are immune to being thought of as 'not posh enough' by some little faction above them. And he say 'But my dear they are so TERRIBLY middle class!'.

wordfactory · 11/01/2013 14:38

Ah yes. The poor posh do like to play the 'I'm posher than you' game. There's nothing like a poor snob is there?

wordfactory · 11/01/2013 14:42

bec from what I can observe, as an impartial arriviste, the younger generation of posh are far less concerned about pedigree and background and rules then the older generations were.

I think too many of them have seen that pedigree and background and rules are no protection against the big bad world.

PostBellumBugsy · 11/01/2013 14:47

Of course, thoroughly unreconstructed Alan Clark!

Yes, I know the Spencers thought the royal family to be terribly nouveau, as they'd been aristos for more centuries. It kind of disappears up its own fundament, when you start going along that route though.

However, it does make me think that the meaning of the word is still very much defined by the social placement of the person using the word!

Viviennemary · 11/01/2013 14:49

Rich is a fact that can't be denied. Posh isn't always. I'm not usually philosophical at this time of day. Grin

TwinTum · 11/01/2013 14:52

I am from a working class (or possibly lower middle class) background (depending on whether you ask my mum or dad). My grandparents were clearly working class. I am wealthy (good job through education). DH is similar, but probably more lower middle class background. My family consider me wealthy, but not posh. My children, on the other hand, are definitely considered posh by my family (not in a bad way - they love them dearly). They go to private school, have "posh" accents (they have grown up in London whereas my family are from an area with strong regional accent), the trappings of a well-off middle class lifestyle (holidays overseas, big house, a nanny(!) etc) are just the norm for them. So the question is how many generations does it take to go from being merely wealthy to posh too (not that I care if they are considered posh or not so just a question).

Clearly if "posh" is equated only with upper class my offspring will never become posh (unless they do a Kate Middleton and marry into the upper class, in which case I might have posh grandchildren). However, there is no doubt that some people at least (e.g. my family) see "posh" as extending beyond the upper classes and they do still make a distinction between weathly and posh (since they do not see me as posh, just my children). So maybe it is a relative question as someone above said.

grovel · 11/01/2013 14:53

My FiL was posh but poor. He said the secret to happiness was simply to condemn anything he could not afford as vulgar.

TwinTum · 11/01/2013 14:54

Also, is Kate Middleton posh (and was she before she married) or just wealthy?

becstarlightstarbright · 11/01/2013 14:57

wordfactory very true! I think a lot of these distinctions will disappear as the generation before dies off. I do find it quite entertaining, and part of me regrets its passing. But then the other part of me looks at the front bench of the government and thinks 'bring on the revolution!'

Viviennemary sums it up beautifully.

LoopsInHoops · 11/01/2013 14:59

Hmm, this and you other thread combined would make excellent easy-written article fodder. Call me suspicious...

GregBishopsBottomBitch · 11/01/2013 15:00

People who are posh and not rich i refer to as "Hyacinth Bucket",

But Posh and Rich are totally separate.

RuleBritannia · 11/01/2013 15:04

PostBellumBugsy said, "I can't remember who said it now (probably Nancy Mitford), but you can tell they are not one of "us", because they had to buy their own furniture (as in it wasn't handed down through the generations). "

Ooh! Ooh! I have some of my parents' furniture and some of my grandparents' china! The table I'm sitting at now was my parents' Utility table.

EmpressMaud · 11/01/2013 15:06

I thought Hyacinth Bucket was supposed to be working class, given her background?

seeker · 11/01/2013 15:07

"People who are posh and not rich i refer to as "Hyacinth Bucket","

I suspect that's because you don't get the programme- the whole point is that she thinks she's post but isn't.

It's a typically nasty snobbish English programme- laughing at people who don't know the rules. And doubly nasty because the makers must have known that most people would miss the point- so they could laugh at their audience. Very horrid.

blondecat · 11/01/2013 15:14

No

Outside of the US and Australia you can be posh but poor and rich and definitely not posh

LoopsInHoops · 11/01/2013 15:14

Anyone else think we're providing fodder for The Wright Stuff? Hmm

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