to think I'm not bu over missed party

[ghoulelocks]

DS was invited to a friend's birthday and I RSVPed in plenty of time, however I went into labour over 4 weeks early and that morning gave birth. I didn't think to text from the labour ward with all the stress of early baby/ gbs and pph! About a week on I sent a text offering to either drop present off or for boys to meet up and apologising for missing the party. I got a snippy reply about how bad it was for her ds as half the people didn't turn up etc.

Now I know from experience how annoying it is to book a party at avenue and have no shows, but surely I couldn't have done more?! (and also to secretly think she's daft for expecting lots of people to come to a party the day after new year...)

Did you mention in your text that you had some pretty extenuating circumstances?

If she thinks youmissed it because you couldn't be bothered, I can fully understand why she was snippy.

She feels bad for her ds's lack of friends at the party but you have a perfectly good reason why you didn't think to get your ds there.

I'd look at it from her perspective. She's really disappointed for her son that so many people didn't turn up to his party.

You didn't think to text from the labour ward which is fair enough for you, but for her the result was the same.

It was just unfortunate that your child was one of the many who also didn't turn up.

And as for being daft for expecting people to turn up to a party the day after New Year, presumably these people knew the date when they accepted the invitation so the date is irrelevant. She's not daft for expecting people to turn up to a party they said they'd go to.

Congratulations on the baby!

Perhaps she forgot it was you IYSWIM. Could you not text back a joky reply like 'Aw, sorry for DS but I bet I had the best excuse!'?

I did say in the text why I missed it, back2two I did think it was as valid as excuses get. She's probably heard through mutual friends too as it was a fairly dramatic waters everywhere at work start and the story seems to have done the rounds!

I've just sent back: 'So how do you want ds to get his present, I can drop it by or we can meet up'

I think it's unfortunate that you seem to have borne the brunt of her natural irritation about so few people turning up. Because yes, YANBU in concentrating on giving birth rather than the party!

However, I think YABU in complaining about the date. If she'd had enough acceptances to make the party viable then I can understand her going ahead with it. The 2nd January, for many people, is a working day.

how very dare you go into labour early

some folk cant see past their precious children tbh I would forget about it and let her rant on to herself, congrats on the new baby

How are you now OP?

Sounds as if you might be the only one to apologise so she has taken it out on you.

I don´t think 2nd Jan was particularly bad for a party though.

We´re some people back to work then?

Op don't worry, there is nothing you could ave done, and if you had told me that you went into labour early iwould have been fine about it as you can't help that. I would have been not so pleased about excuses such as I forgot, too busy etc

YANBU....bloody hell, I think you had more important things on your mind! Seriously, if giving birth is not a good enough excuse then god knows what would be.

Congratulations :)

I agree with diddl - you're the only one to apologise, so she's taking it out on you.

Perhaps she was just having a moan in general and didn't mean to come across as snippy. You can't tell tone of voice (or see accusing glares) in a text.

Diddl ... My office were back on the 27th, I would have been but had that day off as was working the Saturday.

I think she just needed to vent, I would put it out of my mind.

Congrats, hope baby is doing well! She is being very silly to direct her annoyance at you. Forgive her silliness and move on

PS if I go into labour four weeks early there'd no chance giving my apologies for any missed commitments will be my first thought!