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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to have left London and be loving being a country-bumpkin / to be old before my time

34 replies

FingoFango · 09/01/2013 13:08

DP and I left London for the countryside last year, aged 29. We don't have kids yet.

I am loving tramping round in my wellies, horse riding, growing things in our lovely big garden, sitting by the open fire in our cozy local pub, dog walking etc......and in the summer it was even better with BBQs and bike rides. I have even taking to baking, listening to classical music, and I have even invested in a sewing machine, which are all things I would never have done a few years ago.

A lot of my friends seem to think this is unreasonable behaviour and makes us middle-aged before our time and can't understand why we no longer want to be in London getting drunk the whole time.

AIBU to be old before my time?

OP posts:

throckenholt · 09/01/2013 13:10

nope - you have just chosen not to follow the herd and make your own choice about what you value.

valiumredhead · 09/01/2013 13:10

We did the same 5 years ago and have never looked back!

Went to London last week and tutted at a siren that woke me up during the night

atthewelles · 09/01/2013 13:12

It sounds lovely OP and a lot nicer than sitting in traffic jams, shouting to be heard in overcrowded pubs and clubs and spending your Saturdays wandering around busy shopping centres looking for a 'nice top' to wear out that night.

Original poster

FingoFango · 09/01/2013 13:17

Thank you, yes we love it but some of our friends think we are strange.
Might be time for some new friends ......

OP posts:

WorraLiberty · 09/01/2013 13:30

Really?

Your friends think you are strange so you're going to get new ones?

Now that really is strange!

Surely it's just down to what floats your boat and theirs.

RedToothbrush · 09/01/2013 13:35

Why is that 'being old before your time' rather than just simply having different interests?

Isn't it just a form of snobbery, and yes, immaturity on the part of your friends simply for not respecting and understanding life choices rather than being age related in any way?

LRDtheFeministDragon · 09/01/2013 13:40

YANBU!

That all sounds perfect to me, and I am slightly younger than you. I don't live in the country but I can't take London. I would love to have your big garden, that sounds perfect. I don't have a sewing machine but I quilt (which I love but which is definitely aging!).

I think some people are just more inclined to 'nest' than others. If your friends are being serious, then they're just a bit different from you. Not worse or better, but what they like is no reflection on your choices.

Enjoy it all. There's no law saying that if you suddenly decide you're missing out, you can't go clubbing later on, is there?

Original poster

FingoFango · 09/01/2013 13:57

Was half joking about the new friends.....

OP posts:

MickeyTheShortOne · 09/01/2013 14:00

Hell no, YANBU. I've been a country bumpkin all my life and london is my idea of hell. Currently living in a small town and I hate it, but needs must. long live country bumpkins!! Just need my trac'orr now..

NoillyPrat · 09/01/2013 14:02

Yanbu. I do the same all the stuff as you and I'm 22. I love it If I had to pick between going to a bar/club or staying in cooking or chilling by the open fire etc, I know which one I'd pick.

PaleHousewifeOfCumbriaCounty · 09/01/2013 14:03

Sounds perfect to me!

LRDtheFeministDragon · 09/01/2013 14:06

This thread is really lovely, btw, it's making me think of all the nice things I could be doing in a very depressing January!

NoillyPrat · 09/01/2013 14:11

Ok, that sentence up there was supposed^ to say: I do all the same stuff as you.

I love being a country bumpkin. Wouldn't want it any other way

cathers · 09/01/2013 14:20

Definitely NOT bu. I left London, aged 26 to return to Cornwall just before birth of DS. Best decision ever. Sadly though I have become more distant with a few friends who still live in London due to distance, different interests, different lifestyles but the friends who have remained close have become dearer.

It's just a different chapter in your life, people are different and will become closer to you at different phases.

JessicaMLH · 09/01/2013 14:23

YANBU - please swap with me!! I'm 22, not middle aged, but I'd love to live the country bumpkin life

FatherHankTree · 09/01/2013 14:26

YANBU. Tramping around in wellies is one of the best things about living in the countryside. As long as you don't turn into Liz Jones, you'll be fine

Original poster

FingoFango · 09/01/2013 14:29

Yes I do love the country bumpkin life! I have decided to get a cat as well so I am just looking at cats on Preloved ......

OP posts:

PessaryPam · 09/01/2013 14:35

Country living is fab. Lots of nice walks and views and pubs.

ThalianotFailure · 09/01/2013 14:35

out of interest, are you a Londoner? Or how long did you live in London for?

we have been contemplating a move out of London for a while, and whilst DH has lived her for about 15 years, he wasn't born here and has lived / studied / worked in other places. I, on the other hand, have lived and studied and worked here for ever (41 years) and whilst in many ways I love the countryside (all our holidays in recent years have been in the British countryside) the idea of actually living there does fill me with fear, and I'm wondering how irrational that fear is!

Original poster

FingoFango · 09/01/2013 14:42

Thalia no I'm not a Londoner.
I have lived in London for 5 years.

I think a lot depends on your interests - do you like walking / running / cycling / horse riding / walking dogs / country pubs / country drives / admiring beautiful quaint little cottages / seeing deer running wild (all the things I love).

Would it bother you having to drive everywhere (unless close enough to walk /cycle), not having a selection of funky bars / restaurants etc on your doorstep? Are most of your friends in London? I do feel a bit socially excluded sometimes but wouldn't move back to London.

I can be in London in 90 minutes if needs be

OP posts:

TraineeBabyCatcher · 09/01/2013 14:43

I love wellies! And although I don't live in the countryside I love all the things you say. We live in a town so less access to many countryside things but I love having a garden so that I can do outdoorys stuff and gardening- even if it is on a smaller scale.
I'm only 20 so I don't think its an odd/middle age thing to do.

What I do find odd is how many people stuff in the rain and there fancy shoes/boots/uggs/heels/etc- just get a pair of wellies on people! I'm in wellies as soon as the rain starts but I find it seems to take a few days of heavy rain before others join me.

TuftyFinch · 09/01/2013 14:50

I love living in the country. I'm from London and wouldn't go back.
If I was a millionaire I might buy a little pied a Teresa.

Peevish · 09/01/2013 15:06

We just left London for the country, and while I do find life here very isolating (I go to the toddler group in the two closest villages, but no potential friendships emerging yet), I adore the quiet, the good air and being able to walk straight out the door onto a footpath through glorious fields and spinneys.

Neither of us is a Londoner born, but we'd lived there for ten years very happily - but the last month in the country has made me realise what a high price we paid in all kinds of ways for London's undeniably good things. I do miss classical music concerts and art stuff, but there's no denying that daily life here with a baby is far more pleasant.

Ephiny · 09/01/2013 15:07

I live in London and don't get drunk all the time . I even do gardening, walk the dog, bake etc. I listen to classical music too, and if you want to go to concerts, there aren't many better places to be than London.

YANBU to live where you want and have the hobbies/lifestyle you want. I don't really understand your post though.

fuzzpig · 09/01/2013 15:25

YANBU. I am as that is the life I would really love with our DCs. I really don't give a flying fig whether it is unfashionable. :)

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