to question whether private education is really worth it?

[Haroldbishop]

I know some people are wealthy enough to send kids to private school without it having an impact on other aspects of their life, but it seems to me a lot of people put themselves under great financial pressure the send their kids to private school.

My question is, is it really worth it?

I went to my local comprehensive, which was pretty poor (private education was simply not an option for my family), but I came away with excellent GCSE and A Level results, went on to read law at a top university and now have a great job and earn really well. I am not alone as amongst my friends from school there is a doctor, a couple of lawyers (at top City firms) and various others that have done well in their choosen professions. I also know a couple of people from my old school who have played sport at international level.

My parents 'topped up' my comprehensive school education with a few lessons from a private tutor just before my A-Level exams in the one subject where my teacher was exceptionally dreadful, and that did the trick. They also made sure I had lots of hobbies and interests as I know private schools can often be better for sports, drama, music etc so I never missed out as a child and did lots out of school.

On the other hand, some of my parents' friends have kids who went to one of the top private schools in the country, and half of them have not gone on to do much with their lives. Appreciate that could be to do with other factors beyond the school.

I'm not seeking to criticise anyone's choice, but just really interested to hear why private education is so so important to some people that they are willing to make huge sacrifices for it in situations where they are not able to afford it with ease.

Is it the academics, the social aspects, sports etc that is so important to people?

Don't believe the education is better than state. The teaching is probably not as good. The facilities, the extra opportunities, the small classes. This is what you pay for.

There is surely some middle ground between "a waste of money" and a "must have"? I know that my brother's extensive travelling in Europe has been a great source of pleasure to him, an advantage in his career and a source of education to his son. But it's not the case that I and my children can't cope because we haven't had this particular opportunity; we'll just find some other way of learning and enriching out lives. Different things are important to different families. But most things in life are nice extras. Worth having, but not worth getting upset about.

It's worth it for us and certainly worth it for DS.

Rather than being molly-coddled and "babysat" by his teachers (as someone said above), he is encouraged to be independent in thought and action. He is sporty, clever, has loads of friends from all walks of life in and out of school. He isn't put under undue pressure, but neither is he allowed to sit and fart around all day.

He was at a state school until end Y2, I work in a state school and I am very glad we have the option of choosing otherwise as it suits him better.

"Worth" is relative to what you expect in return for your payment surely? And I feel we are getting a very good deal.

Oh Lord, the value of something cannot be measured can it? It is entirely personal.

Only the person buying that somehting can say if it's worth it to them.

You absolutely can't make a generalisation about private education being 'worth it'.

The question has to be considered on a case by cast basis. Every child and all schools are different. Some are über academic, some offer great pastoral care, others are fab for sports, music whatever. Some private schools are a bit shit.

Do you have am exceptionaly bright child not being stretched at his state school? Or a dyexic child who would benefit from smaller class sizes and a more supportive environment? Can the parents afford it without putting a strain on other things? Do you work long hours and not like the idea of your 13 year old in the house alone after school and not able to take them to sports clubs etc? Work abroad a lot? Then private school or full or weekly boarding can be a life saver.

You don't guarantee better teaching at a private school, but if you pick the right one for your child (and you can afford it!) then they will probably come out with a better experience.

About choice, isn't it? Paying allows you to exercise more choice over what kind of an education your child receives.

I think private education is great for kids who aren't particularly bright and would struggle in a normal school. I've seen such kids blossom in smaller class sizes

That's incredibly insulting 3, but I imagine that was your aim?

Given the ridiculous % of privately educated children who end up at top universities, it clearly isn't just great for kids who aren't bright.

I find (with 8 years of current experience) that state education is most helpful to those with SEN as they get most of the 1 to 1 tuition and TA support.

3smellysocks

That's funny, my privately educated DP seemed to be under the opposite impression. But then, he did go to a very good private school. His brother, who was less bright, was sent to a private school as well, a less rigorously academic one.

I managed just fine in state school in classes of 30+ plus though.

I think most children will flourish in smaller classes, completely logical. It's the workload and expected abilities at the school in question that will determine whether the small class size is of any benefit to the child in question.

I went to both and got excellent grades at both but was stimulated more and flourished at the private school

To me it's not worth it at all, I did well at the local comp and now my children are doing the same. They love school and are doing very well, they also have lots of friends in the area and are well grounded.

The day I judge the qualty of an education by how many A*s a child obtains, is the day I know I have lost any understanding of what value means.

I think its very easy for people to say its not worth it - I did well at a state with 30+ children etc but there are actually so many variables.

Some private schools are not that academic but they have smaller classes which suit some children.

I did well at a state school but way below what I was predicted when I left Junior school, it was a particularly vile secondary school though. DH was at state school (top catholic school - amazing reputation) school but was mildly dyslexic and even though they knew they did nothing to help him so he struggled.

Some areas have truly dreadful state schools and fab private schools and other areas people are fighting to go to the state/grammar schools above the private ones. Some areas do not have grammar schools at all.

It is not worth it for all children in all situations but may suit some people and that financial stuggle may be worth it - I don't think thats a given though and I don't necessarily agree that you should send your children private just because you can afford it. I think its very individual to whether it is worth it or not.

I have 1 DC at state school (age 6) and one at private (age 4). Both their teachers are incredible and I couldn't be happier but at the state school there are one or two teachers I do not consider as good as DSs teacher and I am sure I will come across the same later on at the private school too. The quality of teaching has nothing to do with state/private IMO.

I also agree with word - I think value means different things to different people.

My aim is for my DCs to reach their full potential whichever school they are at - if that is C/D's then that is fine, what I don't want is them to be capable of A/Bs and get much lower of course. It is not all about academic stuff to me either - there is so much more that is important alongside that.

I know one couple where the decision to send their kids to public school appears to be mainly for the 'showing off' factor. They never say 'ds's school' it's always 'ds's public school'. Everything with them is for show though. They choose to spend their cash on stuff they can show off about, and borrow heavily off family to keep up the pretence of wealth to their mates. Up to their eyeballs in debt though. Each to their own though. - shrug -

No point sending ch to private school if you can't easily afford it and feel bad for not being able to keep up with 'The Jones' ( eg the other wealthy parents at the private school who you might compare yourself to)

My children are state educated. In scotland, we chose GMU (Gaelic medium education) so our kids go to a Gaelic school where they learn 2 languages. They're genuinely bilingual and when they learn their third language it'll be faster than any other child.

For us, we'd never gain the same level of ed by paying for it.

Our children would be disadvantaged by private education!

It depends so much on the school & the child I think.

I went to a private primary school from the last term of year 2 upwards. My parents felt they had no choice. I had been going to the local village state primary, but apparently I was too bright for them & was becoming bored & destructive. The school wanted to move me up 2 years, but my parents weren't happy with the social implications of that.

My private primary was fantastic. Small classes, brilliant facilities, I thrived there & look back on it fondly. I then got the top scholarship to a good private secondary (all-girls), but hated it, so transferred to my local state secondary. To be fair, my secondary was a very good, ex-grammar school, and again I was very happy there.

Part of me rather thinks that private primary is definitely worth it, but private secondary perhaps not so. The vast majority of state secondaries are huge nowadays, therefore will have a top set of very bright kids. The majority of schools will have kids every year who get 10 A* at GCSE. However, I feel that if your child doesn't have a good, solid foundation academically from primary school, then basically the damage is already done by secondary school age.

I know my views are possibly not the norm (especially with regard to importance of primary vs. secondary), but this is my opinion formed from my personal experience anyway! So definitely YANBU to question!

OP, can I be cheeky and ask how old you are?

DS2 went to a state primary which we didn't feel was right for him, so we moved him at the end of year 1 to a private school. He stayed there happily til the end of year 5 and then we moved area to where the state schools are great and there is a real community feel, he also loved it there. He is now at an amazing state high school and is really happy.

With hindsight, if we hadn't been forking out for school fees, we could have moved 3 years earlier and he would have enjoyed school just as much.

Personally all I'm interested in is that my child is happy-I don't care if my dc's are the cleverest, best at sport, amazing at public speaking, I want them to be happy. At the moment this means paying for private education, although I would be prepared to reasses at any point. It's not about private v state it's about choosing the school to suit your child, and if you're lucky enough to have the option of looking at private and public schools it improves the chances of finding a best fit school. To have a child who runs happily into school and comes out enthusiastic and chatty...you can't put a price on that, it's worth every penny.

Depends on the child.

I spent my first year of high school in a private all girls school- I hated it. The bullying from pupils and staff there was awful. Persuaded my Dad I would be better off in the state school. Loved it, did well at GCSE and A-level with few provate Chemistry lessons at the end of sixth form.

I did more sport because I was home earlier compared to an hour bus ride and a 4pm finish at private school.

I got a 1st class degree. I am still in contact with many of the girls I met at private school and I have been more successful career wise and socially than all of them.

I read an interesting BBC article about GCSE results last year and it stated that less than 40% of children who did not achieve the 'average' level at the end of KS2 achieved 5 A-C grades at GCSE so I guess that does highlight how important primary education is. I know there are many other factors that can affect those statistics but that does not include children with SEN so a fairly realistic stat I am thinking.

If a child is behind going into secondary then it must be extremely hard for the school to ensure they are at the right level by GCSE so Bionic has a very valid point. Potentially secondary schools in areas where the juniors schools are not up to scratch will have much worse results than schools in areas where the feeder schools are excellent.

Interesting thread BTW! OP - lots of DHs friends went to private school and he didn't but has actually done better than most of them. It was why I was dead against private school for our DCs but other factors outside of the academic stuff changed my mind once the DCs were at school age!