weddings and oaps

[Hullygully]

I have been invited to a wedding where the bride has developed what must really be called a phobia about old people. (Long story)

She refuses to have any one over 70 in case there is a "medical emergency" which would spoil her day and in order to avoid an outcry she proposes to organise a coach trip for the old people to see The Lion King as a treat on the same day with a special tea at a Holiday Inn afterwards and a video link to her ceremony.

Her mother is 72 and is allowed to go because she recently passed a stringent medical, but no one else of a similar age is allowed. My mother is 73 and looked after her a lot when she was little and really wants to go. Also, she has seen The Lion King already. I think she should be allowed to go to the wedding as a fit and healthy sort of "extra" mother. AIBU?

[EldritchCleavage]

Oh, I say

Damn, I'm now stuck in Leslie Phillips mode.

[JenaiMorris]

On return from their honeymoon the bride could invite the OAP guests for a viewing of the wedding video (with her medical student relative in attendance) and present them all with a photo of the happy couple in a Lion King frame.

I fail to see the issue tbh.

[ethelb]

this is like an inverse no child wedding thread

[Viviennemary]

It is an insane idea. I wouldn't go to a wedding where that was the rule on principle. Still some people will be saying no different from not allowing lots of children.

[MardyBra]

My parents (in their 70s) didn't like The Lion King much as they didn't know the songs (having never watched the Disney version). How about Oliver, The Sound of Music or Grease. They have good foot-tappers for the old'uns. We Will Rock You could be a bit loud for them though, and they would probably think the skirts a bit short in Viva Forever.

[LadyBeagleEyes]

I think The Sound of Music would be very pensioner friendly.

[MrsBW]

You should tell her that at a recent wedding I attended, the only emergency was caused by a child who set fire to themselves. Literally. Thankfully the Best Man saw and put him out before any damage was caused - to the child at least. The Best Man got burned pretty badly.

How on earth is she going to explain to them that she 'doesn't want them at her wedding in case they keel over thanks, but it's OK as we're laying on a lovely spread for you'

Your friend is being utterly bizarre - even more so if she expects any of the OAPs to actually attend.

[shewhowines]

Won't somebody think of the poor poodle.

[Narked]

The dog wore a skirt? And the SM became Leslie Phillips?

I think I love you.



A young couple stand at the altar. The bride respendent in white. Her poodle resplendent in pink. They say 'I do'. Everyone stands to clap and the hefty step-mother moves closer to take a picture. She doesn't see the floral arrangements . She falls, in slow motion, the father of the bride's voice a long, distorted 'NOOOOOooooo!' as he reaches for her in vain. A close up of the innocent dog with shining eyes, then oblivion. A mass of floral print and flowers covers the floor. The bride turns in horror, screaming, 'Binky, NOooooo!!' As her wail fades and the scene becomes fuzzy we hear a muffled, 'Ding Dong!'

[MrsBW]

shewhowines haha!

That'll teach me to read more than the first page before posting...

[SquinkiesRule]

OMG this is hysterical, the bride is bat shit crazy. I'd boycott any of her lunatic plans for the aged. My 73 year old Mum wouldn't even want to see the Lion King or watch her precious wedding on video link. What a horrible bride.
Now we can all wait with baited breath to find out how this all pans out, and if one of the young 20 something guests has an allergic reaction to the food, or gets drink and falls and cuts their head. God forbid the bride or groom could fall ill, or have an accident. Stupid woman.
Maybe you could link her this thead and she can see how silly she looks to the rest of the normal world.

[Pandemoniaa]

I can only assume that Hully, like me right now, is suffering from scriptwriter's block and has needed Some Sort of Diversion to try and overcome it. And to give her credit, all was going really rather well until Leslie Phillips and the sweet poodle made an appearance.

[JustFabulous]

I have only read the first few posts so far but hully you really need to have a word. Seriously.

[magimedi88]

I hope no one goes to her wedding, with an ageist attitude like that.

Can you imagine what would happen if she said No Blacks or Gays at my wedding??


I suspect someone has said what I've said already but I can't be arsed to read the whole thread as it is making me so cross.

[LadyBeagleEyes]

It's always best to read the whole thread though, magimedi88

[Tee2072]

Has the bride gotten a new dog? Is she, perhaps, afraid the same will happen again?

::trying to find sympathy::

[fuzzpig]

I would really like you to employ a fellow guests as an actor, and have them suddenly discover an allergy to the provided food, or feign a heart attack, or something. If you could video it, I might just believe you :o

[fuzzpig]

(I mean a young guest)

[middleagedspread]

This thread is making me snort.
I have visions of all these mature guests walking under the lychgate in their finery then suddenly being barred from the church to get on a bus to watch The Lion King.
Perhaps someone (obviously medically qualified) could invite the other guests to complete a medical questionnaire, have their blood pressure & temperature taken before sitting down. Perhaps it's a role the ushers could take on?

[OnTheBottomWithAStringOfTinsel]

Creosoted fuck is my new swear phrase.

Also am weeping at phobia of button mushrooms

[Hullygully]

it's very difficult. the tragedy at the altar with the doggie has made her utterly intransigent, she feels almost cursed by the elderly, I'm surprised shes even laying on a treat for them, normally she just ignores them

[NippyDrips]

Waiting for the punchline....j

[HeadfirstForAMistletoeKiss]

Are you writing a sitcom?


Cos if you're not, you should

[sameoldlovebunny]

rubbish?