Am I being over sensitive? Relatives comment touched a nerve.

[Catchingmockingbirds]

I had a miscarriage last year, a day after my scan. Dp and I were devastated but decided to keep trying and assumed it would take quite a while. We were really lucky and conceived straight away and I'm now coming up for 5 months pregnant.

Dp's aunt asked DP tonight over the phone how I was. I'd had a bad day (bad sleep last night, last day of school holidays, trying to get everything organised, hyper DS, dog kept getting under my feet, etc) so was a bit annoyed and DP replied with 'she's a bit annoyed today.'

His aunt then stated "well she better stop getting annoyed or she'll have another miscarriage."

Was she being unreasonable by saying this or am I just over-sensitive due to hormones and only miscarrying a few months ago?

I think Aunty has just relegated herself to the "Fine" category of friends and relations.

:o I think you're right!

Yes she is a twat who doesn't deserve anything but 'fine' from now on. Remember that and you'll feel better! Don't let her twatty comments bother you, she's not worth it.

Some people suffer Foot-in-Mouth-Disease, it doesnt mean she isn't concerned for your well being.

I think you are over reacting to be upset about it, especially upset enough to post about it. She probably just meant that you shouldn't get too stressed, but worded it badly.

Don't make it into something it's not, especially if you rarely even see this woman. It was nice of her to ask aphid you are.

Congrats on your pregnancy OP! I'm in a very similar situation to you, I had a missed mc last year that was devastating, but now 5 1/2 months pregnant. (Yay!)

I've had similar comments , one of my work colleagues knows my history and keeps trying to talk to me about a book she's reading that suggests that there is always a subconscious reason for mcs and morning sickness etc. apparently they suggest that 'on some level' the woman isn't ready for the baby.

I told her I disagree and don't like the presumption that the 'blame' falls to the mother in this theory but she keeps trying to talk to me about it. I think she is trying to make it a positive, suggesting that now I am 'ready'. But it's very upsetting for me to hear her theories.

I think people forget how emotionally fraught pregnancy and generally having babies is ( especially when it was a while ago like your aunt).

So even though your aunt probably was well intentioned, she, and all people should be more considerate of how their comments might be received.

Yanbu. Wishing you a healthy and happy final few months of your pregnancy

2013 is going to be a good year