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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Rude friend?

23 replies

Ganetgob · 04/01/2013 19:42

I don't think IBU, just thought I'd ask you lot.

I haven't seen quite a close friend for about 3 months. Its her birthday on Sunday. I text her this morning to ask if I could pop round and take her present and she said it was great because she was in all night. I went round earlier, she answered the door, said she would usually ask me in but couldn't, took the present from me, asked quickly if I'd had a good day, then shut the door as soon as I'd finished answering. We didn't arrange me coming in for a drink or anything, but surely it's just good manners when accepting a gift?

All very strange, don't you think? Am I right in thinking that was rude? And if not rude, then just really weird?

OP posts:

Original poster

Ganetgob · 04/01/2013 19:44

It doesn't sound as unreasonable when I read it back. Maybe it was just strange as it was about 30 seconds between me ringing the bell and having the door closed in my face!

OP posts:

hermioneweasley · 04/01/2013 19:44

You arranged to drop off a gift, not go round for a drink. I wouldn't necessarily expect to be asked in. Perhaps she was planning a shag! (with her partner, not you).

dexter73 · 04/01/2013 19:44

Sounds like something was up round at her house and she didn't want you to come in. Maybe in the middle of an argument?

backwardpossom · 04/01/2013 19:44

Erm, weird yes. Have you text her to ask if she's ok?

GirlOutNumbered · 04/01/2013 19:45

If it were one of my close friends, I would be worried as that would be out of character and really weird. I would probably text/call to check all ok.

Perriwinkle · 04/01/2013 19:46

Sounds very rude to me. Most normal people would at least offer some sort of explanation as to why they had to be so curt with you or were unable to invite you in and offer apologies (even if it was a fib!).

If anyone here thinks that the behaviour you've described is normal then they must be pretty odd themselves.

Mynewmoniker · 04/01/2013 19:48

I agree with the text suggestion.

MooncupGoddess · 04/01/2013 19:50

Hmm. New boyfriend round? Cooking crisis? Unfortunate bowel problems?

In any case, it sounds like her problem and nothing to do with her relationship with you, so I'd leave it and just text to invite her for a drink.

Backtobedlam · 04/01/2013 19:50

Sounds like she was in the middle of something. I'd assume something had suddenly cropped up rather than she was being rude.

LauriesFairyonthetreeeatsCake · 04/01/2013 19:53

Too weird to automatically be 'rude'.

NewYearNewNagoo · 04/01/2013 20:22

I would be concerned rather than upset by that.

In your opinion, had to interrupted a row or something, er, fun?

PumpkinPositive · 04/01/2013 20:24

Sounds like she was getting a good seeing to.

Nancy66 · 04/01/2013 20:24

bit rude - if it wasn't convenient she should have said before letting you go round.

not the worst thing in the world but still a little thoughtless

HecatePropolos · 04/01/2013 20:25

I'd be concerned. Seems like something was up.

Original poster

Ganetgob · 04/01/2013 20:42

I've text, nothing back yet. She had tights on so I doubt she was getting a good seeing to! Maybe an argument. I'll update as soon as I know!

OP posts:

DeWe · 04/01/2013 21:17

If she said she'd normally ask you in but couldn't, I wouldn't think that rude at all. She's explained that she can't at that point.
If she normally asks you in, I'd be concerned something was up.

I wouldn't think popping round with a present was anything but dropping the present off myself.
If you wanted a chat/coffee then I'd expect you to have asked along the lines of "Can I drop your present off at XX time? Would it be convenient to come in and have a catch up too as it's ages since I've seen you."

Original poster

Ganetgob · 04/01/2013 21:34

It was weird because she would normally ask me in, thats what usually happens. Anyway, turns out her and hubby are having a massive row so I'll let her off!

OP posts:

Mia4 · 04/01/2013 22:16

Sounds a bit odd, YANBU to be wondering and a bit confused but it could of been any reason: arguing with someone, about to have a good hard shag with partner, mid self pleasure...she was obviously busy

I once did something similar to a friend of mine, i was waiting for my DP to come home who'd dressed up for my birthday, unfortunately she kept trying to chat until she saw my DP pulling up in his car, complete with fireman's outfit and I flashed her my stocking.

RobotLover68 · 04/01/2013 22:20

I was about to say massive row - my DSD phoned us to drop in for a cup of tea - she was most put out when we said "not a good time" (we were having a big row)

MammaTJ · 04/01/2013 22:23

She was making whoopie?????

Badgersnatch · 04/01/2013 23:45

Is she having a party that she hasn't invited you to?

jessjessjess · 05/01/2013 01:55

Maybe she was dying for the loo?

Damash12 · 05/01/2013 02:02

If this was me I'd think it was def rude or something odd going on. Text/call and ask if ok.

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