To be fed up with too many toys and too much stuff in the house...

[Maffy]

Sorry if this sounds really unappreciative/spoilt, but our DS and DD are very lucky to receive presents, practically throughout the year, and our house is cluttered with stuff, much of which is hardly used or needed.

I have a clear out reguarly but feel very guilty getting rid of stuff (to charity etc) just to make room for new.

I tried really hard with family and friends before Christmas to suggest one ideal, small gift, but several still bought slightly ill-suited 'big presents' - including a toy drum kit from a friend of a distant relative...

We really cut down on presents to our children this Christmas and they were still delighted, but we feel really mean compared to others. I'm not brave enough to return presents to sender either.

So does anyone have any advice how to stem the flow of toys and stuff into the home, please?!

I could spend months listing on ebay the stuff in our attic, but cannot find time!

before Christmas I took some lovely stuff to local womens refuge and they were very grateful

Can you ask some of the over-generous ones whether they would be prepared to give your DCs money for their accounts to go towards car/university/house when the time comes?

If they really are getting stuff all the time, then I would make a one in one out policy. They can open the new thing, and if they want to keep it then fine, but they have to choose one thing to take to a charity shop. I would do this in front of the giver, especially if there are repeat offenders, and perhaps they will stop buying them so much stuff.

suggest specific gifts if you can. books? Subscriptions to magazines? paying for lessons (ballet or swimming etc)? Clothes? Expensive day trip (walking with dinosaurs at the O2 arena, seeing a London show such as lion king or start a savings account for them

Also like the idea of giving gifts to local charities working with children.

I sorted through dds room today and she has endless jewellery,hair stuff, stationary and about ten thousand lip glosses. She has a birthday soon I feel like asking for none of that please.
Re toys I have dd aged 10 and dd aged 2 so I can't even get rid of dd1stuff cos dd2 will use it.

Trouble is that you don't know what's in the presents till they've unwrapped them,and as they then know they've got whatever items they are,it's a bit tricky to spirit them away!

I do a clear out to the charity shops before Christmas and birthdays,and I try to buy all practical presents such as new clothes,duvet covers,posters etc,with a place in mind for them.

I let others then buy all the frivolous stuff - at least there's less of it then.

I store them in our bin locker and bring them out/rotate them throughout the year.

Just cleared a load of stuff of DS's away including Lightning McQueen stuff in good nick, which I know other little boys would like, but I'm so lazy, I just chuck it all.

I can't believe anyone would throw good toys in the bin - surely it's not that much more effort to take it to a charity shop?

I am sick of all the stuff too - but can't throw it out due to the scarily accurate memory of my 4yo who will ask specifically for things and get very upset if I have thrown anything - even broken things away.

Lulu that's so wasteful!

Doesn't your boy ask for his toys? DS1 has a fair amount of stuff, but if I just took stuff away then he would notice in an instant and get upset at missing his stuff.

Many thanks for all your advice. I don't buy big presents for other relatives, so again feel guilty when they buy our DC expensive gifts. Apart from the wooden castle (£6 at a car boot, but excellent condition) we bought for our DS, his best present was actually a selection box!

The relatives I've spoken to about too much stuff just say they can't resist things for the children...

Days out would be a brilliant idea!

OP: I totally hear you. I feel the same re my children. It's exacerbated by the fact that we live in Africa and I look at the piles of toys they were given for Christmas and I actually feel quite sick when I see the poverty that surrounds us. Our solution was to have a huge clear out just after Christmas and we took a car load full of toys and clothes to a small orphanage near where we live. That was an amazing experience and I'm glad we were able to help in some small way. I also explained to the children that we were giving away their toys because some children had nothing and they had a lot. They are 4 and 2 and were able to understand this and helped me select what we were going to give away.

Can you find a refuge or something and take the excess there?

If you live in the North West, there is a great charity that does fabulous works for children, called Wood Street Mission (Manchester). They have a website detailing what items they need.

Any charity in any region would gratefully receive any surplus toys/books.

In terms of stemming the flow, others have made good suggestions...donations to days out, magazine subscriptions etc.