to really want this for my birthday tomorrow?

[Moominlandmidwinter]

A bloody day off. I don't mean off paid work, as I'm on maternity leave. I mean I would like for the cleaning, cooking and washing up to be done, and for the house to be lovely and tidy without me having to lift a finger.

I haven't stopped for days, I somehow got roped into hosting a NYE party for DH's family, and true to form, he did nothing to help clear up, despite promises. I've spent the last two days catching up.

Maybe I'm just feeling a bit down about my birthday, as it's a truly shit time to have one and always a bit of a let-down. I'm a bit secretly disappointed, as was hoping DH would arrange a baby-sitter, and take me out. But he's told me that he's planning on taking me and the 4 DCs out for a meal. This is a lovely gesture, but to be honest, it would probably just be stressful. I'm being an ungrateful bitch, aren't I?

tell him you would rather not all go out for a meal, and explain what you would rather happen. You are not at all unreasonable in your wishes!

Hope you have a nice birthday

If you go out for dinner you won't need to cook at least! Did you tell him you wanted a day off or a babysitter?

That's a good point, noblegiraffe. My only concern is that DD3 is going through a phase of displaying bad table manners and makes a terrible mess when eating. She's 5.

I have told DH not to bother with buying me a present, just to take over for the day. I did tell him I was hoping we'd be able to go out on our own for a couple of hours. My DM did offer to babysit, but I don't really trust her to look after my 3 month old properly. She was holding her the other day and lost her grip on her and narrowly missed banging her head on the table. She's ill and only weighs 5 stone, I don't think she could handle 4 DCs ( whole new thread).

No one can make you do anything. Just don't do it.

I really should be careful what I wish for. DD2 has woken up with a sickness bug. Birthday is now officially cancelled!

Ha! Its my birthday tomorrow too, and last year, at the end of the day I thought actually, what I want is a day in the house by myself. This xmas, my present from the kids (3 and 1) was a "voucher" for exactly that . DH will take them away at about 8-9 am and bring them back at 5ish for dinner, bath and bed. Am just looking for a date to do it as it expires at the end of Feb! Happy Birthday for tomorrow x

Moomin - sorry to hear that your DD is unwell - I hope that it's just 'one of those things' and not the noro virus :(

Your birthday is not cancelled, it's postponed! This time, tell DH exactly what you want, a babysitter and a grown up, stress free, dinner out after a day at home alone. He can take the kids out for the day then book a sitter!

A day to yourself is more valuable than anything. Last year I went away with my sister for a couple of nights, just shopping, eating, drinking, catching up with old friends while Dh looked after DCs, it was lovely to remember what it was like before being a wife and mum, I love my family dearly but felt so refreshed after a couple of days away and appreciAted them more when I got back.