ro be cross with dh

[tenby84]

Ds aged 8 weeks wasn't planned. Dh accepted it and things are ok except i kind of feel oblidged to pick up slack. Ie i do 99 percent of care 24/7. Ds is breastfed.
However, we do have 2 older ds and of course they need attention too.
Tonight i was washing older ds hair when baby ds started crying. Dh was upstairs on pc but did not attempt to help me with older ds or baby. In the end i had to ask him and he grudgingly helped.
Later on i was having a shower and heard baby ds cry. He just left him in moses basket.
I could have lost my cool at that point but just picked ds up. He didn't need feeding. All he wanted was a cuddle.
Aibu to be cross.

No, of course YANBU.
Was he like this with the other dc when they were little?

I think you need to tell him to pull his finger out and get a grip TBH!

You need to talk to him.

Why are you feeling guilty about having ds3? I presume your DH was a enthusiastic participant?

Sometimes contraception fails, it happens so unless you coerced him into having another child you need to tell him he needs to pull his weight and pitch in with childcare, that includes bathing and cuddling and entertaining etc etc etc.

I think you need to have a discussion with your DP about this, sooner rather than later.
You can't do everything, planned or not they are all his children and he should be taking responsability for 50% of their care.

And if he's so averse to having further children, he needs to look into a permanent contraceptive solution.

Would never bath them but otherwise was more hand on.

And if he's so averse to having further children, he needs to look into a permanent contraceptive solution
Exactly, and then he needs to man up and take responsibility for the ones he already has!

Wow, he sounds like an absolute arse! I would of ripped DP another arsehole if he had left any one of ours to cry.

He needs a bloody good kick up the backside!! Then give him one from me, too.

tell him to stop being such a prick & look after his baby- ok, so you carried & gave birth to ds3, but he helped make him (& i bet he participated fully with that ) - favouritism is not on, the older boys will pick up on it & the baby won't be a baby forever, he'll grow up & know his dad doesn't treat him the same as his brothers.