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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

How to get shut of facebook pest?

33 replies

HANIEL · 31/12/2012 08:58

A guy from work keeps messaging me on facebook and being really suggestive. I already deleted him once but then he messaged me saying he was sorry that I deleted him etc and asked what he did to upset me. I was like FOR GOD SAKE, DOES HE NOT GET THE HINT. How do I stop him from hounding me. If I deleted him on fb then surely he shouldn't be able to message me. He just doesn't give up. I am married with two kids. Why is it that if your friendly with some men a few times, they then think they have the right to think you are romantically interested in them.

OP posts:
FiftyShedsOfGrey · 31/12/2012 16:24

I don't agree Sally, and for me it is akin to going onto a thread where someone is asking for advice on say...the best way to cook noodles and posting "noodles are the work of the devil, all your problems could be solved by not cooking noodles"

Pointless and a bit aggressive IMNSHO

fortyplus · 31/12/2012 17:10

I'm over 50 and happy to recognise that social media is a useful tool. Most companies, councils etc have facebook and twitter to communicate.

Anyone who advises others not to use it is just a dinosaur. Your great granny probably wasn't too impressed with the new-fangled telephone when it first arrived. People managed perfectly with letters and personal visits before that.

LilyVonSchtupp · 31/12/2012 17:18

OP being sexually harassed by colleague (for that's what it is) is NOT a "FB problem" Sallying Hmm

Report to HR and take screenshots OP.

Sallyingforth · 31/12/2012 17:48

The point I am making is that this isn't an isolated incident - it's just one in a very long line of problems related to FB, and the only way to avoid them all is to avoid FB itself.
Lumping FB together with responsible sites like MN is just plain wrong since offensive material on such moderated sites is immediately removed.
And comparison of FB with a revolutionary medium like the telephone is just ridiculous. Email provided full communication with friends and business before FB was invented, and continues to do so.
I have specifically NOT told anyone not to use it, only that this is the only way to avoid all its problems. It's an individual choice that anyone can make.

manicbmc · 31/12/2012 17:51

But you can avoid this kind of thing on facebook by deleting/blocking and having your security settings high.

I'm quite sure it's possible to get an offensive PM on MN.

If you get any kind of harassment in life, whether it's online or in rl, dealing with it is best.

FelicityWasSanta · 31/12/2012 17:54

But the problem is sexual harassment- that existed well before FB.

It emphatically is like saying if you don't want to get electronically scammed then delete your email account.

Which while it does have an element of truth in, it entirely ignores the wider benefit of email....

Santasapunkatheart · 31/12/2012 19:21

Facebook is no more evil than the telephone, or letter writing. The former was viewed with suspicion when it was first invented too. I have never had problems with Facebook but even if I did, it is easy enough to solve. Like life, you chose your friends and your interaction. I also find it odd that people take about getting 'real' friends. All my friends on Facebook are writers or people I know personally. Some live in far-flung countries. It is a brilliant way of keeping in touch with people. It takes less time and costs less than conventional means.

I think that reporting for sexual harassment is important. It is not acceptable behaviour. But problems like that can occur in all ways of communication.

So Facebook is not the devil. As a writer I give workshops on the correct use of social media - Twitter as well.

Don't forget that when railways began, people thought they were the work of the devil.

We all have to move with times. No one forces anyone to use social media but used correctly, it is valuable resource. I have found friends (old ones) and also got work.

Hope it sorts itself out, OP. He sounds like a creep.

lovelyladuree · 31/12/2012 22:20

How friendly were you? You saucepot.

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