Dd is now 13, and her dad and i have been separated since she was 15months. Both of us have remarried and have had more children since (he 2xdd, me 2xds). My current DH also had a dd from his first marriage who is now 14. Between us we have come up with a system to share Christmases, by alternating them. This year it was the turn of the other parents to have the dd's so my dd went to her dads on the 21st Dec at 8.30am (collected by him), as did my dsd go to her mum. Both girls are due home tomorrow, when we will do their presents. My dd is booked in for the opticians on friday afternoon, and riding lesson on Saturday morning, a family lunch (with all the gp's) is arranged for Sunday. I go back to work on the 2nd Jan.
My XP has requested by text that he keep her until sat as his dm and ds are coming to visit on Friday and she hasn't seen them for a while. I've said no, as I now only have 5 days until I go back to work, and i want to spend some time with her. He has had her for a full week and i would have thought the could have arranged the visit earlier. His dm is married to a Muslim so they do not really celebrate Christmas in her house and his ds is single with no children or ties of her own. I don't see why they couldn't have come on either Thursday (today) or even Boxing day to spend time with her except that they (XP, his wife and their kids) have spent Christmas with her mother and don't plan to return to their own home until Friday.
I very rarely say no to any of his requests for extra visits, or swapping weekends about because it is important to my dd and to me that she has a good relationship with her dad and her half sisters. He didn't see her at all in december before the xmas week because she had dancing commitments and was on a French trip, and he and his dw were going to his works Xmas party. None of these missed weekends were my fault or my requests.
So..... AIBU to say no to the extra day?