To wonder why some people couldn't be grateful for what they had?

[ilovesooty]

Many posters complained about their presents, or their families, or the way their children behaved. The fact is: you had people around you to spend Christmas with. I drove 100 miles plus on Christmas Eve after work and stayed in a hotel to see my mother in her care home on Christmas Day. My sister who lives 15 miles away went to see her on Christmas Eve (cop out) and didn't invite me for Christmas dinner. I drove back on Christmas afternoon and didn't get a Christmas meal at all.

However, I had a lovely evening by myself, spent today with friends (that was my Christmas) and I know that many others will have been worse off. AIBU to think that many people are complaining about trivial things?

Do I win a medal for the most dramatic Christmas? (joke)

Well you have userped me on the podium

I hope he pulls through love and you get other Christmases with him (that include you looking at the contents of a present with a totally bemused expression your face thinking "there is a prize AIBU thread in this one").

I'll miss MIL's presents if she doesn't get through this. She wraps up her old bits of broken jewellery for her DILs. Not very surreptiously. While doing lunch. And then handed them out right after having made a massive fuss about giving out massively expensive pressies for "actual family". It was the one time of year that me and SIL bonded a bit, our eyes meeting, hosted by oh so careful, quasi expressionless faces.....that spoke volumes. And twitchy lips.

I swear this waiting is the worst kind of suspense ever. I leap like a scalded cat everytime the phone rings, given that it is gone 2 in the morning, terrified it's the hospital about to bring my husband's world crashing down. But it keeps on being some insomniac fax machine that is determine to mate with my non fax phone like its life depends upon it.

Thank you all - I hope the new year brings better things for all of you.

Oh - and I'm back at work in the morning and grateful for it. I love my job.

Thanks, Yes he is another one for the odd gifts, it's probably a generational thing. They mean well ( I think).

Take care everyone. Life is shit and great too, I have great hope for dad. I feel calm and feel he will pull through.

xx

I hope he does, Molly.

Well said OP

What can be difficult varies for me. My stepdad died Christmas 2009 but it was a great Christmas (he died at home) because we rallied together. One of my stepbrothers went AWOL for 7((!) hours on Christmas eve and we started to worry until he sneaked in and we realised he'd bought all of our presents in Sainsburys. They were awful in a really funny way, my stepdad found it funny when we took it in turns to go up to his room to tell him what we got

This year has been utterly perfect. I'm happily married with a newborn DS and I fought off my inlaws so DH got an hour alone with DSSs after he picked them up from his ex. BUT things are more disjointed and I posted as I had a problem with MIL.

One year was technically awful and the other amazing but where I sought a bit of support was wholly unrelated.

Sorry I have nothing else to whine about other than how shit christmas presents are - you see my mum has been dead for the past 37 years and my sister is a completely mad bitch who would probably try and carve a guest rather than the turkey!! So now I whine about the small things and forget the big things.

(puts things into context doesn't it!!)

A counsellor once told me off for saying "but I know there are people worse off than me". She said "you don't have to be destitute or on the street to feel a bit cheesed off". Perspective is important and being glass half empty isn't great but if I hadn't composed a very long post in the early hours of Boxing Day (couldn't post it-would out me) about the minor woes of my family Christmas then I think I'd have internally combusted. I don't think people always have time to type that as a disclaimer - best to assume that with "trivial" posts. That said-I know what Christmas is like without family so hugs (unmumsnetty)

My Christmas was generally very good, although I didn't see any family (totally our responsibility for emigrating). I've no problem with anyone moaning really, different things upset different people for different reasons.

The year when I discovered dh was having an affair because I overheard him telling his OW how miserable his Christmas had been (it was at his sister's house and he had given every impression of having a wonderful time) as he hadn't been able to talk to her for a couple of days was pretty grim.

But put into perspective perhaps thinking of my lovely mother looking after my father this year for his last Christmas as he has terminal brain cancer, and now can't even say Happy Christmas to his children, or reliably say yes when he means yes.

I think you should take happiness where you can, and acknowledge the things that upset you too. Sometimes trivial things are just silly and should be forgotten as soon as they happen but other times they are symptoms of much deeper unhappiness that shouldn't be locked away.

I hope all those that had sad Christmasses have better years to come.

I'm not sure if I understand the premise of the thread...no one else is allowed to complain, but, erm, you are?

We've all got stuff to moan about. It's what life is like. Of course it varies in terms of severity and so on, it sounds like you had a hard time, and compared to others, it was alright - same here. Crap in some ways but okay in others.

I just don't really understand what you're saying unless it's an effort to get people to realise they don't have the world's biggest problem, but I think most of us realise that.

"that it would have been nice to be part of a family at Christmas, however shit it was"

fuck no - my xmases have been wonderful since I stopped visiting family for them. I'll never spend another with them now even if it means being totally alone